The Perfect Child(16)

The park was only a short drive from the hospital, so it wasn’t long before we pulled into the parking lot. Christopher worked on getting Janie out of the car while I grabbed the cooler and bag from the trunk. I’d never been on a picnic with so little food. Usually I packed way too much, and half the food ended up going back home with us, but we could only give her safe foods, which meant our picnic was limited to greek yogurt and pureed peas. I’d gotten her menu approved by her dietician. We’d brought along our own spoons to eat the yogurt and pureed food with her so she wouldn’t feel different. Christopher had come up with the idea, and I thought it was brilliant.

“Janie!” Christopher suddenly yelled from in front of me.

She was headed through the parking lot and straight for the street. He took off running faster than I’d ever seen him move. He scooped her up in one swift movement and cradled her next to him as he walked back through the parking lot. He was still breathing hard when he got back to me. She buried her face against his shoulder, cradling herself in the nook of his collarbone. He looked petrified. I rubbed her back.

“I only took my eye off her for a second,” he said breathlessly.

I rubbed his shoulder with my other hand. “It’s okay. It happens. Remember what it was like with the twins?” The boys had been full of so much energy when they were toddlers and had had no sense of danger. They’d always been taking off—and never in the same direction at the same time.

“If we can handle the twins as toddlers, we can definitely handle her,” he said, trying to sound convincing, but we both knew this was completely different than the twins.

I motioned for him to take her to the playground equipment. “Go play with her. I’ll set this up.”

I found a shaded spot underneath a tree and spread out the blanket, enjoying being outside. Spring was so unpredictable, but it was perfect weather for a picnic in the park. I sat on the blanket, taking a minute to soak in the sun. There was nothing better than the feel of the sun on your skin after a long winter. The winters got harder the older I got, and each year, I understood more why people moved out of the Midwest after retirement.

I watched as Christopher went down the slide with Janie tucked between his legs and his arms wrapped around her. She squealed with delight. He’d been right about how amazing it was to watch her. She was beaming with happiness, the crisis from moments ago already forgotten.

“Again! Again!” she shrieked at him each time he pretended to be too tired to play anymore.

I’d never seen Christopher look so childlike. For the thousandth time, I felt the pain of everything I couldn’t give him. He had always done such a good job of being there for me—holding me while I cried, bringing me flowers, and assuring me that we were still a family even without children—but I knew it hurt him too. He wanted kids as much as I did. He’d never understand how hard it was for me not to be able to give it to him even though he tried to be strong at all times for me. I pushed the thoughts aside. No need to spoil a beautiful day.

Playing with Janie at the park was so different than playing at the park with Caleb and Dylan. She had no idea what anything was and took it all in, wide eyed. She moved like a young toddler, unsure of her footing, and her balance was always slightly off. She didn’t know how to climb anything, and we helped her through most things. Christopher had said that her physical therapist gave positive reports on Janie’s progress and was working hard at rebuilding and strengthening her muscles, but she had a long way to go.

What would happen to her? Would she be able to make up for the important things she’d missed in her development? Were there other kids like her? Did traumatized kids ever recover? I couldn’t help but share Christopher’s sense of responsibility to Janie. How would we know she went to a good home after she left the hospital and not one of those awful foster homes I’d read about in the news? Or what if she was too difficult for a family to handle and ended up becoming a kid who was raised in the system, shuffled around from home to home? What if she became a drug addict or prostitute?

We couldn’t let that happen to her. There had to be something more we could do.





CASE #5243

INTERVIEW:

PIPER GOLDSTEIN

“What did you think of the Bauers when you met them in person?” It was Luke’s turn to ask questions now. Ron had pulled a chair into the corner and was leaning back against the wall, arms crossed on his chest, staring at me.

I folded my hands on the table in front of me. “It was obvious from my first meeting with them that Chris already had a tight bond with Janie. She never left his lap and didn’t speak to anyone except him. She whispered the answers to my questions in his ear, and he acted as her interpreter.”

“We’ve heard from others that he was very good with her. Is that true?”

I nodded. “He’s a pretty huge guy—over six feet tall—but he handled her like she was a teddy bear. It was clear he was her favorite person.”

Christopher was one of those guys you would never fall for when you were a teenager because he was so nice, too sweet. There wasn’t a semblance of a bad boy in him. He was the guy you permanently placed in the friend category when you were young. But when you got older? He was the kind of guy you wanted to marry and build a life with.

“What about Hannah? What were your initial impressions of her?” Luke asked.