The Perfect Child(15)
The concern left her face. “Well, if that’s the case, then I don’t think we have anything to worry about. Nothing is going to happen with them there.”
We stared at Dylan’s and Caleb’s backs as they played together, listening to their giggles and squeals interspersed with the occasional mad shout.
“It’s all so unfair,” I said. It was the one thing that struck me over and over again about Janie’s situation. None of it was her fault. All she’d done was be born, and we didn’t get to choose our parents.
“It really is,” Hannah agreed.
Both of us came from great families. I was an only child, and my parents had given me everything. Dad had worked full time as a civil engineer, and Mom had stayed home to raise me. We’d never struggled financially. The worst thing that had happened to me in my childhood was when our Little League team had lost the state championship in eighth grade. Hannah had had an ideal childhood, too, except she also had a sibling. We’d talked about it all the time during our engagement. It was one of the main reasons we stayed in Clarksville, Ohio—we wanted our kids to grow up with the same innocent childhood we’d experienced.
But neither of us had done anything special to have such easy lives. We’d just been born into them in the same way that Janie hadn’t done anything to have such a hard one. All I could think about when I spent time with her was how she’d done nothing to deserve what she’d been through. Who was going to make it up to her?
NINE
HANNAH BAUER
“Janie, can you put these on your face like this before we leave?” I asked.
Janie had limited sun exposure because she hadn’t been allowed outside the trailer and the windows had been covered. The doctors had given us special sunglasses since her eyes were so sensitive to the light. I showed her how to put them on before handing them to her. She twirled them around in her hands like she was still unsure what to do with them. Finally, I just helped guide them onto her face. The sunscreen was next, and Christopher lathered her with so much that we couldn’t rub it all in, but we weren’t taking any chances with her getting a nasty sunburn.
She plodded along in flip-flops between the two of us, holding on to our hands as we walked out the back entrance of the hospital. She still had a hard time walking upright despite all the work with her physical therapist. She wanted to walk on all fours even when you held her hands, so it felt like we were dragging her along, and I was glad Christopher had brought our car around earlier. Janie waved and smiled at all the nurses we passed, excited to leave the hospital even if it was only for a few hours. I was glad we’d stuck with our plan rather than letting fear make the decision.
One of the valets was waiting by our car when we got to the east exit. He hurried to open the doors when he spotted us. Allison had lent us an infant car seat because Janie was too small for a booster seat. Christopher had taken it to the fire station the previous Saturday to make sure it was installed properly.
“No! No! No!” Janie screamed, shaking her head wildly when I tried to set her in the seat. She arched her back and kicked defiantly. I tried to hold her down, but she bucked against me. I didn’t want to use force because I was afraid of hurting her, so she easily wiggled free from my hold. She toppled onto the sidewalk, howling. Christopher and I knelt beside her. I reached out to touch her, and she jerked away.
“Honey, we really want to take you to the park and play, but you have to get in the car.” Christopher’s voice was calm and steady. He pointed to the back seat. “That is a car seat, and all kids ride in car seats. It’s the safest way for them to ride in the car.”
She scowled at us.
“Do you want to go to the park?” I asked. I felt like such an idiot for not considering how hard it might be for her to be restrained given her history. I made a mental note to be more conscientious about her past in the future.
She nodded.
I reached out and rubbed her arm briefly before putting my hand back passively at my side, not wanting to frighten her any more with my touch. “I bet it’s really scary for you to be locked into a car seat.” Her lower lip quivered. Tears filled her eyes. I reached forward and grabbed the passenger-side seat belt. I gave it a sharp tug, pulling it toward us. “See this belt? Everyone in the car has to wear one.” I pointed to myself as I spoke. “I’m going to drive the car, and I have to put my seat belt on too. How about if Christopher sits in the back seat with you? Would you like that?”
She shook her head, but Christopher ignored her protests. He crawled over her car seat and sat in the spot next to it.
“See, it’s not so bad,” he said, patting the car seat. “Why don’t you let Hannah put you in your seat? I’ll be here with you the whole time. We can ride together.”
She looked back and forth between us. We stood there in silence for a few more minutes before she finally got in. I clipped her into her seat and jumped into the driver’s side, eager to leave before she threw another fit. She stuck her lip out in an angry pout, but after a few blocks, her face transformed as she stared out the window. She pointed to everything. “What’s that? What’s that?” she called out as we drove. She did the same thing whenever I read to her. I loved giving her words for the new world she lived in. Christopher and I took turns trying to figure out what she was pointing at while we drove.