The Party Crasher(45)

  “And, Humph, I understand you used to date Effie too?” Lacey chimes in provocatively. “Popular girl! Such a shame she’s not here. You two could fight a duel over her!”

  “With all due respect, Lacey,” says Humph in reproving tones, “I’m not sure that’s a very feminist thing to suggest?”

  “Are you a feminist now, Humph?” says Joe, in a strange voice. “That’s…new.”

  “All Spinken practitioners are feminists,” says Humph, sounding offended.

  “Well, I still think you’d fight a duel if Effie was here,” says Lacey, unabashed. “Is it too late to get her here? Call her up, Krista!”

  Oh my God. She’s not going to call me right now, is she? I glance down in panic, just to make sure my phone’s on silent. But in my next breath, I realize I don’t have to worry. Krista would never do that in a million years.

  “Wouldn’t work,” says Krista briskly. “I begged her to come tonight, didn’t I, Tony? I emailed her, ‘You know what, Effie, my love? This is the last party at Greenoaks. You’ll regret staying away. You’re only cutting off your nose to spite your face.’?”

      I’m almost breathless with shock. She did not email any such thing!

  “But you know Effie,” concludes Krista. “Goes her own sweet way. It’s a shame, but there it is.”

  “Is she the problem child of the family, then?” asks Lacey, with interest.

  “I wouldn’t say she’s the problem child exactly, but…” begins Dad with an easy laugh, and my heart constricts.

  But…? But…?

  How was he going to finish that sentence?

  I’m suddenly desperate to see Dad properly. I poke my head round the side of the tapestry, but no one bats an eyelid. They’re all waiting for Dad to carry on.

  “Effie is stubborn,” he says at last. “And when you’re too stubborn, you can miss out on opportunities. You can find yourself…trapped.”

  I blink in utter disbelief. Stubborn? Dad can talk! Who hurt his leg because he wouldn’t give up on that 10K? Exactly. And I’m not trapped, I think indignantly, shifting my ankle uncomfortably.

  Well, OK. Maybe I’m a little bit trapped right now. But that’s not the point.

  “Poor old Effie!” says Lacey. “There’s stubborn and then there’s perverse. Who doesn’t come to a family party, for Pete’s sake?”

  She looks around the table with avid eyes.

  “Effie would have come,” says Bean, glaring at Krista. “If she’d been asked properly.”

      “There was a mix-up with her invitation,” says Krista briskly, “so she threw her toys out of the pram. The trouble with Effie is, she’s too emotional. It’s all a roller coaster with her. Total drama queen.”

  “I’d say the trouble with Effie is, she’s never quite grown up,” chimes in Romilly, and I glower at the back of her smug head. Who asked Romilly’s opinion? “She’s still very much the baby of the family.”

  I feel my cheeks start to blaze. What’s that supposed to mean?

  “Oh, I know those types.” Lacey nods sagely.

  “She can’t really deal with life,” Romilly continues. “She lost her job, and ever since then she’s been temping as a waitress. Can’t seem to get it together. And as for her love life…”

  Now my head is tingling. Is this how everyone talks about me when I’m not there?

  “Stop it! You’re all being unfair!” chimes in Bean, sounding distressed. “Effie’s had some really good temp work. It wasn’t her fault she lost her job. She’s just regrouping while she considers her next move. It’s very sensible. And do you want to know where she is, this very minute?” she adds triumphantly. “She’s out on a date with an Olympic athlete!”

  My eyes are suddenly blurry as I listen to my sister defending me. I love Bean so much. She can have my Rixo dress. She can have it forever.

  “An Olympic athlete?” Krista bursts into derisive laughter. “Has Effie told you she’s on a date with an Olympic athlete? I mean, we all love Effie, but an Olympic athlete? I think someone’s been telling porkies. Poor love. She could have just said she was washing her hair.”

      For a moment no one speaks. Then Joe puts down his glass with a firm clunk.

  “I believe the guy in question is an Olympic athlete,” he says pleasantly. “A gold medalist, so I understand. Isn’t that right, Bean?”

  There’s a slightly stunned silence around the table, and I see Krista’s eyes fly open in shock.

  “A gold medalist?” says Romilly, sounding impressed in spite of herself.

  “Yes!” says Bean, somehow keeping it together. “Yes, he is. A gold medalist.”

  “In the modern pentathlon, was it?” Joe adds. “Or rowing, I forget, but I do know he’s now a successful businessman and a philanthropist.” Joe looks expressionlessly at Krista. “Quite a catch.”