The Other Woman(102)

‘You’ve just made the biggest mistake of your life,’ Adam spat at me as he was led away down the stairs.

As the door closed behind them, the three of us remained where we were, unmoving and paralysed with shock. James was the first to speak.

‘If you knew all this, why didn’t you go to the police back then, when it happened?’ he said to Pammie. ‘Why did you put Emily at risk?’

‘And the inhaler was in your house,’ I said, in a trance-like state, still trying to piece together events and remembering out loud. ‘I saw it. You hid Rebecca’s inhaler in your house.’

‘I couldn’t tell the police,’ she cried. ‘And I had to take the inhaler, otherwise why wouldn’t she have used it? He left it right there beside her. Like all the other attacks she’d had, a few puffs would have got her round the right way. People would have known that, her parents would have known that, and would have started asking questions. I had to keep Adam out of the picture.’

‘But why?’ asked James, seemingly as confused as I was.

‘Because he saw me,’ she said quietly.

We both looked at each other as Pammie bowed her head, her whole body shaking. James went to her, and put an arm around her, but she shrugged it off. ‘Don’t,’ she said. ‘It will only make things worse.’

‘How much worse can it get?’ asked James.

‘I’m so sorry,’ she cried. ‘I never meant for it to happen.’

‘Tell me. What is it?’ he asked, terror in his voice.

‘Your father,’ she sobbed. ‘He wasn’t the man you thought he was . . . he abused me.’

‘Mum . . . I know,’ said James quietly.

She looked up in shock. ‘But how . . . ?’

‘We both knew. Adam and I used to sit at the top of the stairs, trying to think of ways to make it stop, but we were too scared.’

She reached out for his hand. ‘One night, he came towards me and . . .’ The words caught in her throat. ‘It was an accident. You have to believe me. He was drunk, and he was coming for me. I was so scared. I backed away, but he had me cornered. He raised his arm, and I pushed him. So lightly, but it was enough to knock him off balance. He lost his footing and fell backwards, hitting his head on the hearth as he went down.’

James bit down on his lip and tears sprang to his eyes.

‘He was so quiet as he lay there,’ Pammie went on, ‘and I didn’t know what to do. I knew he’d kill me when he came round, so I had to get away. I had to get us all away. I ran out of the kitchen, but there he was.’

Her eyes glazed over.

‘Who?’ I asked.

‘Adam,’ she cried. ‘Sitting at the top of the stairs, watching through the banisters. He was there one minute, and then he was gone. In a blind panic, I ran up the stairs, but he was back in his bed, pretending to be asleep. I reached out to touch him, but he shook me off and turned to face the wall.’

‘It was an accident, Mum,’ said James, pulling her in to him. ‘It wasn’t your fault.’

She allowed herself a small smile. ‘You’ve always been such a good boy,’ she said to him. ‘Even that night, when I came in to check on you, you woke and said, “I love you, Mum.” I’ll never know what I’ve done to deserve you.’

‘It wasn’t your fault,’ he said again softly.

‘It is!’ She was sobbing now. ‘I’ve turned him into the monster he is. He’s never said a word, but he knows what I did. It’s why he did what he did to Rebecca. It’s why I feared he was going to do the same to Emily. I had to get her away from him.’

I sat there, numb and open-mouthed as the realization of what she was saying sank in.

‘I need to tell the police,’ she said, shaking herself down. ‘I have to tell them what I’ve done before Adam does. He was so young, he won’t remember events clearly. He’ll just say that I killed his father. I need to be there to give myself a fighting chance.’

James took hold of her shoulders and forced her to look at him. ‘Adam won’t say anything.’

She tried to pull away from him. ‘I have to go,’ she said impatiently. There was a sudden urgency about her, a need to get her story across.

‘Adam won’t say anything,’ James repeated.

‘He will, I know he will,’ she said, panicking.

‘He won’t, because it was me,’ he said.

A sob caught in her throat as she looked at him, confused.

‘It was me, not Adam, sitting at the top of the stairs.’

‘But . . . but it couldn’t have been,’ she stuttered.

‘I saw what happened, and it wasn’t your fault.’

‘No . . . it was Adam. It had to be, because you told me you loved me.’

‘I still do,’ said James, and Pammie fell into his open arms.





EPILOGUE

The daffodils are in bloom and Poppy is crawling in amongst them, much to the chagrin of her mother. She catches my eye as she scoops her up, and we laugh at her muddied knees. Poppy giggles as Emily hoists her into the air and blows a raspberry on her tummy. She looks like her mother when she smiles, she has the same kind eyes and button nose.

‘You’ve got all this to come,’ I say, as I pat Kate’s hand, who instinctively rubs her rounded tummy and smiles.