The Lost Man(59)

‘You’re sure that’s what you heard with Cam and Harry?’ Nathan said. ‘You’re not trying to cause trouble?’

‘No. No. Why would I?’

‘Have you told anyone else? Bub or anyone?’

‘No.’

‘Why not?’

‘Bub and Harry seem pretty close.’

‘Harry’s close to everyone here.’

‘Not you as much. You’re kind of –’ Simon shrugged. ‘Anyway. Look, I didn’t know Cameron well, but he was good to us. And I like to think I’m a good guy.’ He looked at Nathan. ‘I suppose I’m taking a punt that you are too.’

Nathan hadn’t known what to say to that. Finally, he had turned and followed Ilse outside, leaving Simon staring after him.

Ilse had already been sitting in the passenger’s seat with the engine running. The air conditioning was a relief as Nathan climbed in. They pulled away, heading down the long driveway. The house was far behind them before they’d opened their mouths.

‘Ilse, I found something from Cam –’

‘What was up with Simon –?’

They had spoken in unison. Ilse frowned.

‘What did you say?’ she said. ‘Something from Cameron?’

Nathan pulled the card from his back pocket and she had practically snatched it from him. He had kept his eyes on the road as he explained where he and Xander had found it, along with the framed family drawing. Long minutes ticked by as Ilse sat and stared, her head bowed and her hair falling into her eyes.

‘Ilse –’ Nathan said finally.

She cleared her throat and dropped the card on the seat as though she suddenly couldn’t bear to touch it anymore.

‘It’s okay. I’m okay. I don’t know what to tell you. Every day –’ She gave a tight shake of her head. ‘Every day, I feel like I understand my husband even less.’

They hadn’t spoken again until they reached the herd.

Nathan stopped the car a fair distance away to avoid causing more stress than necessary to the calf and its waiting mother. They got out and Nathan threw open the rear door, rummaging through his equipment bag. He found a couple of pairs of different-sized wire snippers and turned to find Ilse standing a short distance away, watching. From the way her eyes flicked to the side, he could tell she hadn’t been looking at him, but past him. Into the back of his four-wheel drive, where they had been together, once upon a time, a million years ago. Nathan slammed the door and started towards the calf. The animal watched warily as they approached. The mother stiffened and flicked her tail. The rest of the herd eyeballed them.

‘I heard that was how the stockman died,’ Ilse said quietly. ‘Trampled in a stampede.’

‘Really? No –’ Nathan started, then stopped as the calf started to bellow. Its mother swished her tail, her muscles quivering. ‘Keep an eye on her, though. She’s not going to like this.’ He handed the wire snippers to Ilse. ‘Are you right with this?’

‘I’ve done it before. Just tell me when.’

Nathan approached slowly, letting the animals get a good look at him. For all the use that was. The cattle were so free range they were almost feral. They never got used to seeing people. The mother eyed him up as Nathan got closer to the calf. He could see that the wire was not too tight around its leg. A bit longer and it might well have pulled itself free. For now, though, it was stuck. Behind him, he heard the mother snort.

‘She okay back there?’ he called.

‘Yes,’ Ilse said. ‘Keeping her distance still.’

In the dust a few metres away, Nathan could see the telltale tracks of a passing snake. Almost certainly long gone now, but he still took a good long minute to check around nonetheless. Antivenin was expensive and had a short shelf life, so the medical centre in town did not keep supplies.

‘What happens if you get a bite?’ Nathan had heard more than one backpacker demand in disbelief.

Nothing good, was the answer, not with the kind of snakes that called the area home. Nathan liked to live by the rule of thumb that if he got bitten, he would die. End of story. As satisfied as he could be with that, he stepped towards the calf.

‘I’m going for it now.’

‘Okay. Say when you’re ready.’

In a single movement, Nathan put his arms under the calf and heaved. Before the animal knew what had happened, he had flipped it on its side and wrestled it down, lying across it and using his weight to pin it to the ground. It was stunned, then opened its mouth and bellowed its outrage into his face. It kicked and struggled, and he leaned into its body, using his knees and elbows to pin it so it could barely move.

‘Got it,’ he grunted, but Ilse was already there, crouched by the rear legs with the wire snippers in hand.

He could feel the heat coming from the calf and hear its heart pounding in its ribcage. It struggled and kicked out.

‘Shit,’ he heard Ilse say.

‘Did it get you?’ He leaned in hard until the animal was subdued again.

‘I’m okay –’ He heard her move. ‘I’m going to try the smaller cutters. I don’t want to catch its skin.’

Nathan was straining a little to hold the calf. It was only a couple of months old but it was strong. It would weigh in heavier than Ilse, and Nathan reckoned he might only have about twenty kilograms on it. It didn’t matter, though. He was stronger and that was enough to make it do what he wanted. It lay still. Nathan listened to the frightened thump of the beast’s heart. And all at once, before he could stop himself, he thought of Cameron.