The Fixed Trilogy: Found in You(91)

At the same time, I now realized the extent of my failures in our commitment to each other. While he would stand by me through anything, I had pushed him away with secrets and lies. And when I had believed that he had resorted to his past behaviors, when I believed he had manipulated me—I’d only gotten highly pissed. He’d been sick in the past, just as I had, yet I’d blamed him instead of offering understanding.

I fell to my knees with the weight of it all. Tears stung at my eyes. “I don’t know how to do this.”

“Do what?” He collapsed in front of me an arm’s length away. So near but, without his touch, so far.

“Have a relationship.” I swiped at the tears falling down my cheeks. “I keep f*cking it up. I kept things from you. I accused you of manipulating me. I didn’t try to compromise about David.”

“I don’t care about any of that.” He nudged an inch closer, his expression desperate. “Just don’t give up on us. Please, don’t give up. I’m a shell without you, Alayna. I can barely breathe when you aren’t near me, when I’m not touching you. Right now, it’s all I can do to hold myself back from taking you in my arms.”

“Why are you holding back?” My need for him was astounding.

“Because I don’t want to resort to sex to solve this.”

“You listened. You always listen.” I choked back a sob.

“Alayna.”


Like always, the sound of my name on his tongue ignited me, and coupled with the distance between us, it increased my want, increased my anguish. “I need you, Hudson. I need you to touch me and bring me back into sync. I’m so far out of tune with you and it hurts—like part of me is missing.”

A weak smile crossed his lips. “You get it then.”

“I do.” I finally did understand it—how the physical connection between us was vital. It brought us closer, united us at a level so deep that our words and actions became meaningless in comparison.

His hand reached out, but he dropped it before touching me. “Are we…okay?”

“I’m not giving up, if that’s what you’re asking. I’m so lost without you. Find me, Hudson.”

“I already have.”

Then we were in each other’s arms, our lips crushing in a kiss that tasted of hope and love and salty tears. His hands on my back lit my body on fire. I needed my shirt off, knowing the feel of skin-on-skin would be my only salve.

Hudson recognized my urgency. Or perhaps it was his own desire that moved his hands to my buttons as I worked to undo his. Our kiss remained unbroken as we shed our shirts, then my bra. Then, with great reluctance, I let his mouth go so he could blaze a trail to my breasts. He cupped them both, first nuzzling and licking in the spot between them before moving his attention to one nipple. He tugged and sucked for long minutes until I was writhing and gasping. By the time he’d moved to the other nipple, I was aroused and near climax.

I’d been so immersed in Hudson’s adoration that I’d missed when he’d unwrapped my skirt until I felt his fingers on my clit through my panties, pushing at the bundle of nerves like it was a release now button. And it was—I was already on a hair-trigger. One simple swirl of his thumb and I was tumbling over.

Hudson held me upright as I spiraled into my release, his other hand ripping at my underwear so that by the time I began my descent, I was completely naked.

As my vision returned, I saw him fixated on the moisture between my legs. His eyes were scarred with lust, his expression wild. So hot. It was so hot. No one had ever looked at me like that before him. No gaze had ever come close.

It was too much in every good way. Too much and not enough. I needed him inside me. Craved his cock pushing into me, filling me. Completing me.

I clawed at the waistband of his pants, too insane with desire to productively work on their removal. Hudson took over and in a flash had lowered his pants enough to expose his hard, thick beautiful shaft.

I was already climbing on top of him when he stopped me with a curse. “Hold on.”

He stood and kicked his clothes off, the ache of his absence made dull with the sight of him stripped. That’s how I loved us best—completely naked, no barriers between us.

He fell back on his knees in front of me. My hands immediately grabbed for his pulsing cock. A trickle of pre-cum glistened on his crown, and I spread it down the length of him.

He groaned. “Come here.” Hudson kneeled up slightly and urged me to wrap my legs around him, my feet braced on the floor on each side of him in a squat. Thankfully, my sandals were platform. They gave better support.

His tip throbbed at my core and I clenched in anticipation, all thoughts of shoes flying from my mind. With gentle expertise, he pushed up and in. I slid down him, taking the length of his cock inside my wet core.

God, oh, god, there weren’t words—the ecstasy, the intensity, the absolute feeling of wholeness, of completion—it was perfectly indescribable. Perfectly perfect.

He bucked into me, and I threw my head back with a gasp.

“Watch, Alayna.”

His command drew my focus back to him. I followed his gaze down to the place where we were joined. He pulled out of me to his crown, his cock covered in my juices, then pushed back in, his rhythm steady and mesmerizing.

“Watch my cock pushing in and out of you.”