The Falling (Brightest Stars, #1)(30)

We continued our drive, through the main gate and to the commissary; the tension from last night was gone. I sighed in relief. I was definitely just tired and borderline losing it. Today was a new day, a new Kael, and a new me. I parked and he led the way to the entry door. The sun was so bright, I had to cover my eyes.

“When will you get your clothes back?” I asked him, as we entered the crowded store.

“Not sure. I can’t get a hold of anyone.”

I wondered what that meant. Who couldn’t he get a hold of? And why were they keeping his stuff from him? A scorned ex, maybe? The thought irritated me.

The cart we had chosen had a creaky wheel that got stuck on every turn. I’d handed Kael my grocery list in the parking lot, assigning him to hold on to it.

I looked at him, pressing him to say more. “Should we go back there again? To find your keys? Maybe they’re in the parking lot. It was dark.”

“We don’t need to go back there. I’ll figure it out.”

Shit. “Okay. Don’t you need a ride to get them?”

“No. I don’t.”

I felt like we were suddenly in an argument in the cereal aisle but I’d missed what we were fighting over. He grabbed a box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch and placed it in the cart. At least he had good taste in cereal. He was keeping his groceries in the seat at the front of the cart where kids usually sat while parents tried to keep them entertained and cooperative.

I ignored his rejection and kept shopping. We needed only a few things, and I was ready for our little trip to finish, since he was clearly in a bad mood. I really didn’t react well to people shutting down; it’s made me paranoid since I was young, made my mind spiral. I knew I needed to say something before my mind fully went there. I stopped walking for a second, and he halted, too.

He looked confused now. But I was getting better at reading him. Granted, it had been only two days, but still. I was cracking him open, slowly but surely.

“If I said something that bothered you, or did something . . .”

“Huh?” He cocked his head to the side and studied my face, the cart, our surroundings. “What makes you say that?”

There were people walking by, looking at us as we stood right in the center of the aisle.

An older white man passed us, keeping his eyes on Kael and me just a beat too long. I noticed his lingering stare, shifting back and forth between us, and the hairs on my neck prickled. The man disappeared around the corner. I almost mentioned it to Kael, but I started wondering if I was just paranoid, and decided not to give the rude man any more attention than I already had.

“I don’t know. I just feel like you’re . . .” I tried to explain myself. I hated that I was so easily at a loss for words sometimes.

He wrapped his hands around the handle on the cart and took over pushing it.

“If something was wrong, I’d say it. I’m just in my own head.” His tone wasn’t condescending or wrapped in a lie.

I appreciated the honesty. It made me feel like I understood what he was doing instead of making it all about myself. And maybe, unlike with my family, the silence didn’t need to be filled while grocery shopping. Kael looked at the list again and pulled the pen out of the sewn-in holder on his ACU jacket. He marked off three items, using a dash next to each one instead of striking them out, the way I always did. I found the tiniest things about him fascinating, and my thoughts began to form themselves into a little cloud that turned into a daydream. I used the silence between us as we browsed the aisles to think about how different we were, why my brother hadn’t called me, and what I needed to do before I could leave for work.

The commissary was crowded as always, but I felt less stressed over the crowd and more at ease than I had been since we’d left the house. Kael still hadn’t spoken as he put three boxes of granola bars into his part of the cart.

“I have some—”

“Not anymore.” He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand.

“You ate my granola bars?”

He laughed. If I hadn’t turned around, I would have missed it. “Mostly,” he replied, smiling a little.

Kael stayed ‘in his own head’ for the rest of the grocery shopping, and he found everything on my list before we got in line behind three extra-stuffed carts. The low prices on groceries with zero tax were worth braving the crowd.

“So many people,” I said to him as we waited.

Kael nodded, looking over at me. His elbows were leaning on the cart. “So many people giving their money right back to the government,” he said, nodding at all the people in uniforms and their spouses.

“You’re always complaining.” I heard the voice before I saw her approach. It was a soft, feminine voice to match an equally beautiful face. “Martin, never thought I’d see you at the commissary. What the hell are you doing here?” She laughed, knocking his arm gently.

She was wearing ACUs that matched his. Turner was written on her name patch. She was below him in rank; I could tell by the difference in the patches on their chests.

“Just getting some actual food,” he responded to her.

She smiled at him in a way that made me feel like I was intruding on them. Her teeth were so straight, I could tell she’d had braces in her past, and her dark brown eyes had thick, maybe fake, eyelashes sprouting out of them. They were so pretty and delicately placed that it didn’t matter if they were real or not. The color of her hair matched them perfectly. Her boots were scotch clean, and she wasn’t wearing a bit of makeup. I wished I didn’t feel so instantly threatened by the presence of another woman. I was feeling a little more sure of myself this morning, but I was sort of distracted by her beauty as they briefly caught up.