The Crow King's Wife(29)

They had all been so kind to her, and the thought of leaving some of them was as painful as a fresh wound, but this wasn’t her place. Her home was in Delvay and with every memory that returned she became more certain that she should be there rather than in Merro. And Seth isn’t in Delvay. A small voice inside her whispered as her eyes rose to scan the surrounding sky for any sign of black feathers. It wasn’t that she hated Seth, but the memory of him was painful. She had trusted him fully and considered him a friend, and he had turned on her. The anger he had shown the last time she had seen him had been terrifying, and she had no desire to be near him again.

“I need the money for travel.” Zoelyn answered quietly. She hadn’t told anyone aside from Dray of her plans to leave yet, and she knew the Blight had kept her secret. By Valor’s expression it was the last thing he had expected her to say, but he covered his shocked expression quickly. “I’m going to Delvay.” She added and swallowed heavily as her throat tightened. There was no way she could say goodbye to Jala or Valor without tears and she knew it.

Valor nodded and his gaze moved past her to rest on Jala who was still busy trying to get the portal stones perfect. It was obvious he was wondering if Jala knew and simply hadn’t told him yet.

Zoelyn followed his gaze and watched Jala for several moments before staring down at the ground. “I meant to tell you both before now, but you are both always so busy. I don’t think Jala ever truly rests. Every time I try to find time to speak with her she is busy at three or more tasks and contemplating another.”

“She can’t rest, and neither can I. When we stop we have time to think, and neither of us can bear that. She dwells on her regrets, and I dwell on guilt. So we push ourselves to exhaustion and pray that one day our hearts will mend and we can find peace.” Valor said softly as he turned to watch the mare once more. “I’m not Finn and I never will be. I know she loves me, I have no doubts of that, but it’s something that takes time. Jala never had a chance to grieve, and she still isn’t allowing herself too. I wish I could help her with it, but I can’t. I’m the bastard that failed to save him and fell in love with his Widow while doing so.”

“And the fact that he isn’t truly dead doesn’t help at all.” Zoelyn concluded quietly and let out a long breath.

Valor shook his head slowly and smiled sadly. “Not in the least bit, though I’m glad he is. Hindsight is perfect Zoelyn and given a chance to go back and do things differently I’m quite sure Jala would be living a simple life in Firym and Merro would still be in ruins. She has a lot on her shoulders and keeps reaching for more. I think she is afraid if she focuses herself on just Merro she will run out of things to keep herself busy with, and then she will have to face what she is trying to forget.” He chewed on the grass stem for a moment then pushed off the rail and rubbed his face. “And this isn’t getting us anywhere and it’s not something I want to dwell on.” He announced with a forced smile. “So back to business, if you truly want to sell her I’ll give you a hundred gold for her. Horses are selling high now, and she is better than most so she is worth it. Too many of the herds were lost in Arovan, so her colts will make the investment worthwhile. Will that suffice for travel money?”

Zoelyn blinked at him in shock and nodded slowly with a dumbfounded expression. “I was expecting perhaps twenty gold.” She admitted quietly. A hundred gold would be enough for her to book passage on a spell hawk if she could find one for hire soon. She had been expecting to have to take a ship out of Brannaford ports.

“Common plow horses are selling for twenty gold right now. Too many horses were killed during the fighting, and prices have sky rocketed on everything. Grain is high, hay is nearly impossible to find in most lands, and anything with four legs and a working body is bringing top coin.” Valor informed her with a shrug then paused as something behind her caught his attention. “But maybe this should wait until we see what this is about.” He murmured as a slight smile crept onto his face.

Zoelyn turned slowly to stare in the direction he was looking and caught the barest glimpse of metal against sunlight in the horizon. “Is that a Spell hawk?” she asked stupidly, though it was obvious it had to be. Nothing else would be in the sky and made of metal.

“Not just any Spell Hawk, I think that is The Shade. It’s well past time for him to return, Jala was beginning to fear the worst.” Valor said cheerfully as he patted her on the shoulder and smiled. “If you play your cards right you might be able to get a free ride to Delvay without having to sell your mare.”