Someone Else's Ocean(30)

“So soon?”

“You’re judging me,” she snapped as she searched through the massive purse in her lap.

“Do you check for dead mice in there from time to time?” Jasmine thumped my shoulder and I gripped it with a shriek. “Oww, that shit hurt.”

“So did last night,” she said, wincing.

“Oh Lord. The freak came out of him?”

She nodded, managing to pry three pairs of shades out of her bright red bag. She picked through them as I started the Jeep. “That’s exactly what happened.”

“Jasmine, it’s nine in the morning. Can’t I be spared until at least noon?”

“I promise not to show you my ass.”

“That’s your idea of mercy?” I glanced at her as I turned out of the parking lot and she pushed out her bottom lip. “Okay, tell me.”

“The captain decided he wanted to role play.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, and you know me, I’m down with that.”

“Right up your backhoe,” I said with a grin.

“Are you ever going to let me live that down?”

“Not likely, please continue.”

“So, I’m expecting like dirty French maid and millionaire boss or something juicy like that.”

“Okay.”

“And I was right.”

“Sounds good.”

“Except what the captain really meant was a role reversal.”

My eyes widened. “Oh?”

Her lips were trembling as she fessed up. “He came out in heels and a frilly frock.”

“Oh, my God!” We both burst into hysterical laughter as Jasmine shook her head with her hands covering her face. “I had no idea what to do. I just stood there while his crooked penis poked out of the apron. I’m telling you as blunt as I am, I lost it. I completely lost the ability to speak.”

“What did you do?”

“I ran. I picked up my purse and RAN!”

I pulled over at a gas station and face planted into my steering wheel. “You have got to be kidding me!”

“Nope. I walked it off until I could think to call a cab and went straight to the wine bar. There I met Mark and only let him get to first base before I passed out in his hot tub.”

I couldn’t contain myself, tears were pouring from my eyes as she wiped her own away.

I sighed, my laughter subsiding slightly. “Poor baby,” I said, leaning over to hug her to me. “You are something else, lady. And you should have called me. I would have come to get you.”

“I’ll never be the same,” she said mournfully.

“It’s probably for the best.”





“This is weird,” Jasmine said, noticing the missing key from the lockbox at the Harper rental. “They should have left it at checkout.”

She knocked on the front door and when she got no answer, she looked at me with a shrug.

“You don’t have the master?”

“I haven’t been home,” she said sheepishly. “Or to the office, remember?”

“That’s right, you were up late watching the Discovery Channel.”

“Shut up, or you’re fired,” she snapped. “Crap. Let me see if I can hop the deck. This is my bad.” We walked the side of the cliff house and I stood in the driveway as she made her way toward the upper deck. There was only a narrow margin for her to get her footing on the ledge.

“Don’t! Not smart, lady!”

“I’ve got this.” She tucked her cotton dress between her legs and scaled the deck like a pro.

“I give it a six at best. Sloppy landing,” I piped as I saw her head pop up behind it.

She shot me the bird.

“Hurry up, it’s hot out here!” I ordered. The sun was beating down on the top of my head and I moved to step into the shade when I heard Jasmine’s blood-curdling scream.

“What’s wrong?!” I yelled loud enough for the street to hear.

“Koti, oh, my GOD! KOTI!”

“What’s wrong? What is it?!” I scrambled to the deck and tried to peek over.

“KOTI!”

“Open the front door, JASMINE! Please!”

“OH, MY GOD! Koti! Don’t come in!”

Fearing for her life, I risked my own and leaped to the ledge of the deck holding on for dear life. My execution was far less graceful, I went over like an old maid clinging to the top of the railing before I landed on my ass. Jasmine was still screaming as I jumped to my feet, ran around the side of the house and came to a screeching halt at her back. “OH, MY GOD!”

Eighty-three-year-old John Harper lay in a deck chair spread eagle and naked as the day he was born, his dick standing at attention for all the world to see. I covered Jasmine’s eyes. “I’m so sorry, sir. I apologize. We must have had our schedules mixed up.” I turned Jasmine back the way we came as she ripped my arms away.

“What are you doing?” I bulged my eyes. “He’s naked, come on.”

With her next words, her voice got eerily calm. “I’ll meet you out front, okay?”

“Ugh, the man obviously needs some privacy.”

“Koti,” she took my shoulders in her hands. “Honey, he’s dead.”