Royally Not Ready(104)

“Okay, so then what was that all about back there?” He points to the drawing room.

“We didn’t discuss how we would go about telling you.”

“I think how she did it was perfectly fine.” When I don’t say anything, he continues, “Why are you so uncomfortable?”

“Because—she’s going to be queen one day, Theo.”

“I’m aware and quite happy about that.”

“Yeah, well, she deserves to be with someone who can provide for her, someone with a higher ranking.”

Theo’s brows tilt down in a frown. “When has that ever been an issue with this family?” he asks. “That’s never been a requirement, nor will it ever be.”

“But that’s not what I grew up with.” I punch my hand through my hair. “I grew up knowing my place. My parents instilled it in me. Reminded me every day where I belonged. I’m here to serve, not to pretend I’m someone else.”

“I see, and what exactly do you think that someone else is? Because no one is asking you to pretend. No one is asking you to be anyone but yourself, and from what I can tell, that girl likes you . . . for who you are, nothing else.”

“She does,” I say softly.

“Do you believe you’re not good enough?”

“Yes,” I answer without even having to think about it. I know I’m not good enough.

Theo blows out a breath and then says, “Let me ask you this. Do you love her?”

My gaze meets his and I nod slowly. “Yes, sir. I do.”

“And have you told her this?”

“Yes.”

“Are you worried about what the staff might think? Is that the issue? Because you know I have no problem with the love you share for each other.”

“I’m afraid people will think I’m posing as something I’m not.”

“How about instead of looking at her as a part of the crown, you look at her as someone you just met. Would you think twice about being with her?”

“No, but I’m not afforded that luxury,” I say. “Because that’s not the case here. She’s going to be queen, and if we stay together, if we . . . if we marry one day, that affords me a title, a hefty title.”

“A title you are more than able to handle,” Theo says. “A title I’d be proud to see you wear. But how about this, instead of worrying about the future and what might come, focus on the now. She needs you, and I need you. Please don’t hurt her heart because you’re scared. She’s been hurt far too much.”

I nod. “I’d never want to hurt her. I love her, Theo, I truly do. But, sometimes, don’t you think love isn’t enough?”

“Never,” Theo says, straightening now. “Love is always enough. If love weren’t enough, then I wouldn’t be in a position where Katla is at my side. We’ve had our ups and downs, the history has written itself, and without love, I’m not sure we would’ve made it through all the tragedy we’ve faced. The first thing you need in a relationship is to like each other, and that’s then followed by love. You have both, so don’t be a fool and scare yourself away from that. Now, you go back into that drawing room and reassure that girl that her coming forward with the truth is not to be punished, but commended.”

“Yes, sir,” I say, standing from my chair.

“And, Keller?” When I turn to face him, he continues, “Thank you . . . thank you for showing her the true beauty of this country when I wasn’t able to. Your hard work has not gone unnoticed.”

“It was my pleasure,” I answer.

“And from now until the foreseeable future, Henrik will be staying on board as my secretary.”

My heart trips out of my chest. “Theo,” I say softly. “You . . . you’re just going to give away my job?”

He shakes his head. “No, you’ll be at Lilija’s side now. I don’t matter as much as Lilija does. I need you to stay close to her to continue to help her through this transition. Henrik is wonderful, but he’s not you. If you resume your position with me, you’d be wasted. Your responsibility now is to guide Lilija.” When I look down, he adds, “This is not a demotion; it’s a promotion. She’s our future, and I’m the past. You need to keep moving forward.”

“I understand,” I say, connecting my eyes with his. And although I understand his words and his sentiment, I’m shocked. I haven’t believed I could have Lilly, and now . . . now that seems possible. Not only that, I’ll have even more capacity to serve this country I love. This man, who has treated me like a son, has given me a blessing beyond what I ever thought possible. Fuck. “I’ll do you proud, Theo.”

“I know you will. And you’ll also make your parents proud, Keller.”

I nod humbly. What can I say to that?

I excuse myself and go back into the drawing room, where Katla and Lilly are huddled over quite a few table runners. Lilly is speaking quietly, running her hand over the embroidery work, her expression in complete awe.

Being here in the palace makes our situation profoundly different. It puts things into perspective. We don’t have our safety bubble anymore. There are eyes and ears everywhere. And I can’t be as candid as I want to be with her. Now that we’re here, now that she said she’d take the throne, everything has changed.