Reaper's Legacy(119)

“So why don’t they just go home?” I asked Em, scooting over to sit next to her.

“Who?”

“Painter and the other guy, Banks.”

“Banks will stick with us all night,” she said quietly. “He’s supposed to keep an eye on us, make sure we make it home safe. I guess Painter’s just along for the ride—maybe he’s worried after what went down with Hunter and Skid.”

“He was watching you while you were dancing,” I said. “He may not have seemed interested before, but he’s definitely interested now.”

“I could give a f*ck,” she replied, her voice flat. “Painter, Hunter … men in general. I think I’m swearing off them entirely. Too bad I can’t just flip a switch and go lesbian.”

“Pretty sure it doesn’t work that way,” I said, sighing. “Men really are a giant pain in the ass, aren’t they?”

“Speaking of, how’s Ruger?” she asked. “I hear you’re fighting with each other.”

“Um, that seems a bit strong,” I said. “I’d say we’re just not talking much, which is what I wanted. No offense, but after what happened, I don’t think I want anything to do with the club.”

She sighed.

“I can understand that,” she replied. “You didn’t exactly get a good intro. I know it probably doesn’t seem this way, but they’re actually really good guys. It’s not like this shit happens all the time.”

The car swayed, and Dancer crashed into us.

“You are boring!” she yelled in our faces. “We’re having a good time here. If you don’t sing me something good at the bar, I’m making you ride with Painter.”

Um, no. I would rather have my eyes poked out than do karaoke.

I didn’t say that, though. I just smiled politely and decided this was a sign—I’d call a cab after Marie sang her song. I had to be up in six hours, so that was probably for the best anyway. At least I didn’t have to worry about Noah—Elle had taken him, offering to keep him overnight and get him ready for school the next day. That was a huge help.

“Oh my God!” Maggs squealed suddenly. We all froze. “We haven’t done presents yet!”

“Presents!” Marie yelled, clapping her hands. “I love presents!”

Maggs lurched down to the front of the limo and pulled back a big basket full of unopened packages and envelopes. She grabbed one at random, throwing it to Marie.

“Who’s it from?” Darcy asked. Marie tried to focus on the writing, then shook her head.

“Can’t tell,” she said. “They have really, really messy handwriting.”

“Here,” I said. “Let me look.”

She handed it over.

“The tag was printed off a computer,” I said, snorting. “It’s not even a fancy script or something. You’re too drunk to read. Oh, and it’s from Cookie.”

Marie pouted.

“It’s not my fault you guys bought all those shots,” she said. “It’s not like I could let them go to waste! That’s just wrong.”

Darcy nodded sagely.

“She’s right—if you throw away booze at your bachelorette party, the marriage is doomed.”

“You say that about everything,” I accused. “The marriage is doomed if she doesn’t order the steak and the shrimp. The marriage is doomed if she doesn’t dance with at least ten guys. The marriage is doomed if she doesn’t tell us how big Horse’s dick really is. How can all of that be true?”

“I know these things,” she declared. “Am I right, ladies?”

“Hell yes,” Dancer chimed in. “Darcy knows her shit. If she says the marriage is doomed if Marie doesn’t drink enough, it’s time to start pouring shots down her throat!”

“Right now it’s time to open presents!” Maggs yelled. “Ladies, we need to focus. The marriage is doomed if she doesn’t get these open before we hit the karaoke bar!”

“Shit,” Marie said, her eyes opening wide in panic. She ripped into the bag, peeked down inside, and started giggling madly. Then she pulled out a giant double-headed jelly dildo in swirling colors.

“Oh, Cookie,” she said, sighing. “It’s beautiful! How did you know?”

We all burst out laughing, and Maggs grabbed another present. This one was from Darcy, and I shit you not, it was a giant, strap-on cock.