Pride, Prejudice, and Other Flavors (The Rajes #1)(98)

The pain in his eyes made the urge to reach for him tear at her again. But all she could do was stand there, their gazes locked.

Finally, he looked away. “I think we’ve kept Nisha’s husband waiting long enough.”

But she couldn’t let him go. Not like this. “Listen, I behaved terribly. I should never have said those things. All my life I’ve been taught that doing the right thing gets you what you want. So I focus too much on doing things and getting what I want, maybe to a point where I become callous to everything else. I get that. And I’m sorry. But I have no reason to lie to you about Julia.” She pressed a hand into her belly. “She has a talent for finding every vulnerability in you and manipulating it. She’s here because she wants something and she’ll hurt you to get it.”

His eyes softened, the anger-tinted curtain he always kept between them lifted for a moment. “You did deal my ego some good wallops, but I haven’t done any better either. So, yes, we’ve had a hard time getting around our judgments of each other. But if you can’t trust me with the truth, you’re asking me to judge someone else unfairly, too.” He took a breath, that chin dimple digging deep. “I thought being on camera might help Emma get her head on straight. And maybe it did a little bit. Neither Emma nor I meant you or your family any harm when we got involved in this. If Julia does indeed mean to harm you, I’ll do all I can to stop her.”

If disdainful DJ had turned her into a bumbling idiot, this sincere avatar of him saying those words made something inside her fall in place and click tight. She couldn’t do it, couldn’t punish him for what Julia had done. Not without knowing more.

Neel coughed outside and they both looked away from each other and at the door.

“Thank you. I need time to think this through,” she forced out. Just be careful, please.

“Emma’s probably back from her scans. And Neel looked like he needed to talk.” He paused, brow furrowed, lips pursed. “You seem to be holding so many secrets on so many people’s behalf. I imagine it must be exhausting.”

On that note he left, his words hanging in the air behind him like his clean, intoxicating scent. For a moment she was almost afraid to move, lest she step on one of the pieces of her heart that lay scattered in his wake.

He was right about Neel, though. He had looked tortured. She sent Nisha a text before asking him to come inside: “Neel’s here, what do I do?”

Nisha didn’t respond, so Trisha was pretty much on her own.





Chapter Twenty-Eight


You’re hiding something from me, Trisha.” Neel was most certainly not looking like himself. “And my wife’s hiding something too.”

Oh dear.

“What about you, are you hiding something from us?” She sounded like a complete nutjob, but all she wanted was to deflect.

Neel looked like she had ripped off his skin. He dropped into a chair. Dropped, as though his legs had given way, and pressed his face into his hands. Something about his reaction made her think about Mishka’s phone case, which made her think about ex-Barbara.

His shoulders started to shake.

“Are you crying? Neel, what’s wrong?” He was scaring the shit out of her.

He looked up, eyes glistening with fear and shame. And shame, did she mention shame? Fear was okay—it kept you from doing stupid things. But shame? Shame was not good. Shame meant a stupid thing had already been done.

“Did you say anything to Nisha?” he asked.

“About what?”

“About that bloody phone case.” British curses were not good either. Given that ex-Barbara had refused to leave England for him.

“Do you think I would tell Nisha that right now?”

His eyes widened then narrowed. “You two tell each other everything.” This was not true; she had not told Nisha about how she had humiliated herself in front of DJ under the influence of his food. “And what do you mean ‘right now’? Something’s wrong with Nisha, isn’t it? How can you not tell me?”

How could she tell him? “How could you do what you did?” She deflected again. “How?”

He had taken her niece, Nisha’s daughter, to the National Portrait Gallery with ex-Barbara. Behind Nisha’s back. That felt like a betrayal on so many levels. “Actually I don’t want to know.” If he told her, she’d have to tell Nisha. She refused to be the person who hurt Nisha.

“Trisha, please, I need your help.”

She leaned back into her desk. “Listen, I have a lot going on. I don’t have time for this right now.”

He stood and pushed his glasses up his nose with an unsteady finger. “Okay.”

Not only was his finger unsteady, but the shadows under his eyes were dark and deep.

He was trying to tell her something, and she’d made up her mind about what it was before he’d spoken.

Less than ten minutes ago she had told DJ that she regretted her callousness. Now she was turning away her brother-in-law—a man who had never done anything but stand by her—when he’d asked her for help. That was definitely callous.

“Wait, Neel. Come back. Sit down. Can I get you something?”

He shook his head but sat. “Thanks.”

“Tell me what happened in London.”