Perversion (Perversion Trilogy #1)(41)

“I want you to meet my future queen,” he announces victoriously. Marco’s trying to gauge my expression, which I keep wiped from my face although my insides feel like they’re being beaten with a sledgehammer.

Why? Because the sad-looking girl who walks through the door, sits on Marco's lap, and allows Marco to kiss her on the cheek all the while avoiding eye contact with me, is none other than Emma Jean Parish.

Tricks.

MY Tricks.





Nineteen





“Get a fucking hold of yourself, man!” Sandy’s standing next to me in the garage. As I take weapons from my duffle bag to load them, he’s shoving them back in. “I’m all for a fucking shoot out, but this ain’t just about you. You got other people to worry about.”

“The only thing I’m worried about is killing Marco,” I grate.

Haze comes into the garage. “It’s Tricks,” Sandy begins to tell him, and I think I’m going to be sick before he’s even said the words out loud. “She’s with Marco.”

“Holy fucking shit. How did—never mind.” He shakes his head. “What do we gotta do?” He comes up to the table and eyes the weapons. “You gonna kill Marco or Tricks?”

“I haven’t decided,” I say, knowing that’s bullshit. “I gotta…I just…FUUUUCCCKKKKK!” I roar, throwing a handgun at the wall.

“Grim, no matter who you kill, it ain’t gonna make that feeling go away. Trust me on this one,” he says, his words heavy with regret.

Haze and Sandy remain calm. “How about we kill later and get fucked up now?” Haze suggests. “Might take the edge off.”

Several hours have passed and I’ve drank enough whiskey and smoked enough weed to render me stupid. Yet the murderous feeling lingers even through the haze. Tricks is one of them. She’s with him. When she told me I was the only man she’d ever kissed, it was another fucking lie I fell for.

Along with the fucking rest of it.

I once told Tricks in one of my letters that I don’t really get sad. I guess that was a lie, too. What I’m feeling now is deeper than sadness. It’s more like rage and despair are hate-fucking in my heart. And Sandy’s right. No matter who I kill, it’s not going to go away.

I’m still not sure I believe him.

Distraction isn’t working well for me, either. I’m on my back on my bed. Two naked girls are kissing one another over me. I have no idea how they got here. They rub each other’s tits and finger each other’s pussies, but I don’t feel anything that stirs my dick even the slightest.

It’s probably just all the weed I smoked.

Or because the girl who once shattered through my barriers has broken me in a different way, pulverizing a heart I didn’t even know I had.

The window slides open, and the last person in the world I want to see leaps into the room. She pulls a gun from her backpack and aims at the two girls on my bed.

“Get the fuck out,” she demands in a calm, confident voice. If I didn’t hate her so much, I’d almost be proud of the way she’s handling herself.

But I do. So, I’m not.

I open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. It’s still hazy. The girls scramble for their clothes and dart out the door.

I sit up. Tricks approaches the bed, setting the gun in her pocket.

“Nice gun,” I say sarcastically.

“Thanks, I borrowed it. Without asking.”

“You should go bring it back to whoever you stole it from before I get mine. If I can find where Sandy and Haze hid them…”

“Kiss me,” she blurts.

“Kiss you?” I laugh through my returning rage. The absurdity of her demand rendering me sober. “I just found out not three hours ago that you’re with MARCO of all fucking people and now you want me to kiss you?” I pull at my hair. “You’re with the fucking enemy. YOU ARE the fucking enemy!”

“Then kill me,” she responds with a desperation in her voice that cuts my chest wide open. She grabs her gun and holds it out to me.

I stand from the bed and take it from her. I press it to the side of her head. My hand shakes for the first time ever while holding a weapon.

“Do it! Shoot me, or fuck me. If it’s not you who’s going to take my body, it’s going to be him. I just want it to be you…” Her voice grows as shaky as my hand. “It’s selfish of me, but it has to be you, Grim. It has to be you.”

I press the gun harder and grit my teeth.

Tricks closes her eyes. “I’m biding my fucking time. I’ve bought two bus tickets out of town. One for me and one for Gabby. We’ll be gone soon. I don’t want to belong to Marco, because…because I already belong to someone else. I always have.”

I ball my fists and grit my teeth. “Is that something you tell yourself while Marco’s fucking you? Or did you come back to make sure you fucked everything in my life up before you disappeared on me again.”

She has the audacity to roll her eyes. “Did those girls clog your senses with all that fucking perfume? I told you. No one but you. Marco hasn’t fucking touched me! Not so much as a kiss. You’ve got to believe me, Grim. I don’t want any of this. I never did. I just want to explain before I go. I never wanted—”