Park Avenue Player(91)

And yet I’d had no idea what she’d been going through all these years. If I had, my attitude toward her certainly would have been different. I’d been filled with such disdain for her; meanwhile, she’d apparently been suffering the majority of the time.

The sun was starting to come up by the time Elodie and I left, vowing to return in a few hours.

Tense silence filled the air during our ride home. We were both too exhausted and distraught to talk. But at one point, I needed to ask her a question, even though I knew she didn’t have the answer.

“How did she not say anything to you when you’ve been talking about me to her?”

“I don’t know, Hollis. I’ve mentioned your name numerous times. Is it possible she thought it was a coincidence and never considered that you were the same Hollis?”

I shook my head. “I can’t imagine she wouldn’t have at least questioned it. My name is not a common one, and she knew my niece’s name. We were together when my half-brother’s girlfriend gave birth, though I don’t think the two of them ever met. None of this is making any sense.”

And it doesn’t look likely that we’ll get the chance to ask her.

Elodie noticed I was driving toward Connecticut. “Where are you going? You’re taking me home?”

I hadn’t realized I was taking her home and not back to the city with me. But the truth was, I needed to be alone tonight. I wanted to be there for her. I really did. I wanted to be a better and stronger man than this, but I just couldn’t.

“I need to be alone tonight. I hope you can understand that.”

“I’m not sure I do, Hollis. I think we need to lean on each other right now, not push each other away.”

She was right. But I needed to process this without having to worry about how my feelings might impact her. Maybe that was selfish. But I couldn’t be around anyone right now, not even her.

As I pulled up to her house, I shook my head. “I’m sorry. I know I’m not handling this very well. Maybe this will sink in at some point. I’m just not there yet.”

After a moment, she seemed to soften. “I’m sorry for making you feel bad about it. I understand.”

Elodie said nothing further before she got out of the car. I waited until she was safely inside before taking off.

Exhausted, I had every intention of going back to the city to get some much-needed sleep. But after seeing a sign on the side of the road, that wasn’t where I ended up.





Chapter 41




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Elodie




It was almost dawn, and I hadn’t slept a wink. I’d been sitting up on my couch and staring into space, trying to make sense of this. Wracking my brain, I’d ruminated over all my communications with Bree about Hollis. I was desperate to figure out whether she knew my Hollis was her Hollis.

The pain in his eyes tonight was something I wouldn’t soon forget. It was clear that a part of him still loved her. And I wasn’t going to lie and say that knowledge didn’t have a profound impact on me. Then again, I loved her. So much. So how could I blame him?

Anna had left Hollis for another man. Bree always referred to the love she lost. Was that the other man? Or was it Hollis? She never wanted to talk about it.

Was it possible she’d figured out the truth about who I’d fallen in love with and felt badly for having hurt him, so she never said anything to me? Maybe she wanted to give him a chance at love without interfering, because she knew how much she’d hurt him.

That was just one theory. The questions in my mind were endless. And I knew we might never get the answers we needed.

Filled with urgency, I rushed up off the couch and grabbed my keys, which included the one to Bree’s house.

Running next door, I let myself in. I knew I had no right to trespass, but my need for answers was desperate. I also missed my friend. Being in this empty house without her was eerie. My eyes wandered over to her ever-present water glass on the table next to the chair she sat in. Knowing she might never return was heartbreaking.

I ran up the stairs and started going through her drawers and closets, in search of anything that could provide me answers. My tears fell as I kept coming up empty, more devastated with each passing minute. I sifted through all the things she might never get to enjoy again, like the clothing hanging in her closet. Concert ticket stubs littered the top of her bureau. She loved music and live shows. She might never see another one.

Life is so unfair.

My eyes landed on a stack of photo albums in the corner of her closet.

My hands shook as I grabbed them and took them back downstairs to the living room. Sitting on the couch, I inhaled a deep breath and opened the first one. It mostly contained photos of Bree as a child. In one image, she was so thin and small it reminded me of what she’d looked like today at the hospital, shriveled and childlike.

The second photo album featured photos of her teenage years. It didn’t take me long to stumble upon the one I’d been looking for: the first photo of Hollis and Bree. Anna. They were at the beach, and Hollis had his arm around her. Bree wore a bikini and Hollis had on board shorts. They looked happy as could be with the sunshine bearing down on them.

It was surreal to see them together, my best friend and my boyfriend. They loved each other. Or at least Hollis loved her. That was evident from the way he smiled at her in the next picture I came upon. They were sitting under a tree. It was a candid shot, as if someone had happened to notice the way he was looking at her. God, this hurts.