Park Avenue Player(107)
Speaking of the devil, Hailey waltzed into the living room. My eyes widened when I got a look at what she was wearing—a cutoff shirt.
“Where do you think you’re going dressed like that?”
“To the movies.”
“With whom?”
“Kelsie.”
Somehow, I was skeptical. “That’s it?”
“And Evan.”
“Evan?”
“Elodie knows.”
I looked at my wife. “Care to explain?”
“I’ve met Evan and his mom. He’s a nice kid.” Elodie shrugged. “I told her she couldn’t go alone with him, though. She had to bring Kelsie along.”
This can’t be starting already. “How old is he?”
“Fourteen,” Hailey answered.
I thought back to the chronic masturbator I had been at that age and cringed.
“Go put on a different shirt,” I ordered.
She huffed, but she returned to her room. It was a rarity that she didn’t argue with me.
After Hailey left for the movies, Elodie and I continued hanging out with our son on the floor. He had one of those playmats with toys hanging from it, and he was now kicking his legs around. Both of us were concerned because the poor little guy hadn’t pooped in days. We were on what we’d dubbed “poop watch.” If he didn’t go tonight, we planned to take him first thing in the morning to the pediatrician.
After about an hour of floor time, we noticed baby Ben got the look on his face that usually meant he was about to push something out.
“Oh my gosh! This might be it!” Elodie beamed.
Ben’s face turned beet red, and it looked like his eyes were bugging out of his head. He grunted.
“It’s happening,” I said.
And then came the sound of the explosion.
Elodie picked him up off the floor and ran to the nursery to assess the situation.
Several seconds later, I heard her yell from down the hall. “Ben made the motherlode! The motherlode!”
I ran to the room and said, “Let me do the honors.”
“No, I’m just so relieved he did it that I don’t even mind changing it.”
She handed me the dirty diaper, and I disposed of it in the pail.
Elodie got him changed and dressed in a clean sleeper. She handed him to me, and I lifted him up in the air as we danced around with him. This was what my life had come to—dancing in celebration of a bowel movement. I wouldn’t have had it any other way.
We returned to the living room with our freshly changed son, who surely must have felt lighter after that.
Baaa. “Ben made the motherlode!”
“Did you hear that?”
Elodie walked over to the bird’s cage. “Huey, what did you just say?”
He was silent.
Just when she’d given up and turned away, he squawked. Baaa. “Ben made the motherlode!”
“Oh, man.” I laughed. “Are you serious?”
“You think it will stick?” she asked.
“Well, his last saying only lasted an entire decade.”
I hoped Anna was looking down right now and laughing her ass off.
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Acknowledgements
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We are eternally grateful to all of the bloggers who enthusiastically spread the news about our books and persist even as it becomes harder and harder to be seen on social media. Thank you for all of your continued hard work and for helping to introduce us to readers who may otherwise never have heard of us.
To Julie – Thank you for always being one click away. We are so lucky to have your friendship, daily support, and encouragement.
To Luna – Our right hand woman. We know we can count on you for anything and appreciate your friendship and help so much.
To our agent, Kimberly Brower – We’re so excited for the year ahead and are grateful that you will be there with us every step of the way. We are so lucky to call you a friend as well as an agent.
To Jessica – It’s always a pleasure working with you as our editor. Thank you for cleaning up our manuscripts so nicely.
To Eda & Julie – Your eagle eyes and attention to detail is so appreciated. Thank you for helping make Hollis and Elodie the best that they could be.
To Elaine – An amazing editor, proofer, formatter, and friend. We so appreciate you!
To Letitia – Thank you for your patience with this one!
To Brooke – Thank you for organizing this release and for taking some of the load off of our endless to-do lists each day.
Last but not least, to our readers – We keep writing because of your hunger for our stories. We love surprising you and hope you enjoyed this book as much as we did writing it. Thank you as always for your enthusiasm, love and loyalty. We cherish you!