One of the Girls(52)

‘I was just saying I’m worried that I’m not going to fit into my wedding dress. The wedding is still four weeks away and the bump is starting to show.’

‘It’ll be easy to adjust the dress,’ Ana said. ‘If you think about that panel at the front, all the seamstress would need to do is add a strip of fabric on either side of it.’

‘I thought you were keeping the dress a surprise?’ Bella had been to the first fitting and when she’d seen Lexi step from behind the velvet changing curtain, her eyes had welled with tears. She’d stared at Lexi, saying, You’re getting married, Lex! You’re a bride! And then she’d burst into tears. ‘Has Ana seen it?’

Lexi glanced sideways at Ana. ‘We went for lunch one day and … well, it was an impulse thing … we saw the bridal shop and decided to have a quick look in.’

‘What, after I saw the dress?’

There was a pause. ‘Before.’

‘Before?’ Bella repeated, trying to understand. ‘That’s when you chose the wedding dress? With Ana?’

She nodded.

‘You said you’d found the dress on a whim, walking into the dress shop without an appointment.’

‘That is what happened,’ Lexi explained, ‘except Ana was with me.’

Bella felt duped. She’d thought she was the first person to see Lexi in her wedding dress. They’d drunk the free glass of champagne, squealing at Lexi’s reflection in the long, ornate mirror. Yet Lexi had omitted the one important detail – that she’d taken Ana with her to choose it. ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’

‘I thought you’d be upset.’

‘I am upset.’

‘Exactly.’

‘I’m upset because you lied! You pretended I was the first person to see you in it.’

‘God, I’m sorry. You’re right,’ Lexi said, shaking her head as if it had been no more than a misunderstanding. That was the thing about Lexi. She never realised how hurtful her actions could be. How important she was in Bella’s life. ‘I should’ve told you. You should’ve been with me that first time.’

‘Yes. I should have.’

Ana rolled her eyes, as if Bella’s emotions were tiresome. ‘Lexi, you don’t need to apologise for how you decide to get your own wedding dress.’

‘I’m the maid of honour! The maid of honour always accompanies the bride when she chooses her dress.’

There was silence, her complaint hanging there like a stamp of a foot.

‘I can’t wait to see you in it properly on the big day,’ Ana added.

‘You’ll be there, will you?’ Eleanor said.

Bella turned. They all did. The question was asked so sharply it was like it had been fired from a rifle. Eleanor was glaring at Ana, an eyebrow arched. Her cheeks were flushed from the alcohol.

‘At Lexi and Ed’s wedding? Of course!’ Ana smiled nervously.

‘So you’ve RSVP’d?’ Eleanor pushed, eyes glittering.

Bella looked between the two women, intrigued.

‘Yes, ages ago.’

‘Everyone on the hen will be there,’ Lexi added, trying to ease the tension.

Eleanor nodded, but as she turned away, Bella caught her whisper, ‘If you say so.’

If you say so? Fetch the woman more alcohol!

At that moment, the man in the pink shirt appeared, holding aloft a tray lined with shot glasses. ‘Ladies,’ he said, lowering it in the centre of them. ‘More drinks?’





44

Robyn

When the taxi pulled up outside the villa, Fen blinked, as if startled to see they were already back. She stepped out, the headlights illuminating streaks of dried mascara on her cheeks.

‘Let’s have a nightcap,’ Robyn said. ‘I’ll bring them out to the terrace.’

Inside the villa, she kicked off her sandals, then rooted through her bag in search of painkillers. She swallowed two with a tall glass of water. She fetched a couple of ice-cold beers and carried them out to the terrace.

Fen was sitting on the spread of cushions by the low stone wall. Lanterns dotted the ground, and Robyn settled beside her, handing her a beer. She pressed her lower back into the warmth of the stone, sighing as she felt the stretch of her spine. ‘Want to talk about it?’

‘You heard it all,’ Fen said, eyes shining in the moonlight.

‘You said not all memories here are good ones. He’s the memory?’

She nodded. ‘Pathetic, isn’t it?’

Robyn’s beer bottle clanked against flagstone as she set it down. ‘No. Not pathetic. What he did – what he said – it was awful.’

‘He didn’t hit me. He didn’t rape me. He just used words.’ Her head shook lightly as she said, ‘There was nowhere to put them, so I swallowed them whole. They never digested, just sat there, growing heavier and heavier.’

Robyn held her eye steadily.

‘He didn’t even remember me at first. Isn’t it mad that I hadn’t registered in his world – yet he took over mine? Those things he said, I let them worm into my head for years.’

Robyn reached for Fen’s hand. ‘What he feels or remembers isn’t important. You can’t control that. All that’s important is what you feel.’