On the Fence(53)

He took several deep breaths. “When you were ten, you opened your window, popped out the screen, and climbed onto your roof. Do you remember that?”

I thought back, wondering why he was bringing this up. “Yes.”

“Were you scared at all, Charlie? Because I remember when we all discovered you after hours of searching the neighborhood, you were just sitting there, acting like it was nothing big.”

“I don’t remember feeling much of anything. Maybe I was a little scared.”

“Do you remember why you climbed out there?”

“No. Why, do you know?”

“Yes.”

I finally met his eyes and the look of pity there sent a jolt of fear through me. “Why? Why are you looking at me like that? Why are you telling me this?”

He grabbed my hand and held it tight in his. This made me more afraid. “Do you remember your dad and your brothers wanted to have a talk with you? About your mom?”

“My mom?” I thought back, trying to piece together the fragments of my ten-year-old memory. I remembered running up the stairs to get to my room. I remembered climbing out my window and onto the roof. I didn’t remember why, though. My head pounded as I pushed my thoughts. My dad had sat me on the couch and started talking about my mom. I do remember my head got fuzzy and my ears felt like they were filled with cotton. I had needed air. That was why I had climbed out my window. “What was he trying to tell me?”

Braden’s voice became soft, his thumb making circles on the back of my hand. “Your dad wanted to tell you what really happened to your mom that night.”

“When she got in a car accident?”

He looked at me hard. “You really don’t remember what he said? If you don’t, Charlie, it’s not my place to say. I just thought you remembered and you needed someone to talk to about it. I thought that’s why you’ve been having the nightmares.”

A gray-haired man with glasses flashed in my mind. I was sitting in a chair with my feet dangling off. I must’ve been young. He had me draw pictures. I drew rain and glass. Red rain. I squeezed my eyes shut. The image of a pale, lifeless hand filled the blackness. “Tell me.”

“Shh. It’s okay.” He pulled me against his chest, and that’s when I felt the moisture on my cheeks. I wiped it away quickly, embarrassed by its presence.

“You’re so strong, Charlie. You’ll remember. I’ll be here when you do.”

Part of me wanted to beg him to tell me. The other part, the part that was still embarrassed by the tears in my eyes, wanted to shut it out and never think of it again. Wanted to get in a car and speed away from my past. His heart beat against my cheek in a steady rhythm. Every beat drew me closer to him. Soon his hand started making lazy circles on my back. This was the definition of torture, I was sure of it—loving someone who only wanted to be your friend.

“I want to know,” I finally said. I felt like I could handle anything with him there.

“Then you need to talk to your dad.”

“He’s working a late shift. I won’t see him until after I work tomorrow. Can’t you tell me?”

“I can’t. It’s not my place.”

Another loud laugh came from the kitchen, and I felt Braden’s gaze shift to the door. I wondered if he wished he were in there with Amber. If he was nervous about Gage spending time with her. The thought was enough to sit me up straight, pushing away from Braden.

“I’m good,” I said, wiping my eyes to make sure they were free of any traces of tears. “I think I’m just really tired. It was a long week.”

“So you probably don’t want to play soccer this afternoon? Your brother organized a game.” He was trying to make me feel better. He thought soccer would help. And it normally would’ve, but right now I wanted to call my dad and find out what everyone seemed to be keeping from me. “I’m sorry. You have a lot to process right now.”

I forced a smile. “Stop reading me. It’s creepy.”

“But you’re like a book. I told you, I know more about you than you know about me.”

Our eyes met. His reference to our fence chats, thrown out there so blatantly during the middle of the day, made my cheeks go hot for a moment. And what was he trying to say with that statement? That he knew what I discovered at camp? That my feelings for him were plainly written all over my face?

Amber’s laugh brought us out of our eye-lock. She poked her head into the room. “Braden, Gage is doing it again. Come beat him up.”

More inside jokes that I wasn’t part of. I stood abruptly. “I need to sleep more.”

Braden grabbed my wrist. “Fence tonight?”

I gave the smallest nod and then went upstairs.





Chapter 33

I played with the edge of the quilt on my bed. I’d tried to call my dad several times, but he must’ve been busy, because the call went straight to voice mail. I didn’t feel like this was something I could leave in a message.

Braden hadn’t said a time to meet out at the fence. It was midnight now. Everyone was asleep. But Braden’s room was dark as well. I clutched my cell phone close and lay down, waiting for his text or for my dad to call me back.

The next thing I knew, a ray of sunlight was shining in my eyes. I sat up and looked at the clock on my nightstand. Crap, I was going to be late for my first day back to work. I searched my bed for the cell phone and found it wrapped in the covers. The screen was blank, no missed texts. He must’ve fallen asleep as well last night. Or maybe he had been out with Amber.