Love Me (WITSEC #3)(47)

Isabelle frowned. “I don’t know. Knox is a hard person to read.”

I huffed a laugh as I flipped through the rack of clown costumes. “I’m sure it went great.”

“Is he always so intense?” she asked as she looked through mermaid and siren costumes. She was making her own costume for the party, but she had told me it was missing something, an element, and wanted to look around for inspiration.

“He’s like that with everyone. The more you get to know him, though, you learn to see past it.”

Isabelle glanced over at me, and I saw the questions written all over her face.

Smiling, I focused back on my search. “Just ask.”

“Are you—I know you’re with Colt and Creed, and no way am I judging you—” she rambled and shifted her weight from one foot to the other. “But I saw how you were at Keelan’s birthday party with Knox and at the mud run with Keelan. Are you dating them, too?”

“Yes.”

“Wow,” was all she said for a moment. Then she blurted, “I bet you have amazing sex.”

Instantly, my cheeks burned.

Isabelle laughed. “Sorry. I’m kind of jealous, but at the same time, I know I’d be overwhelmed with so many penises in the bedroom.”

“Isabelle!” I gaped.

She giggled. “If our roles were reversed, you mean to tell me you wouldn’t be curious?”

She had a point.

“Soooo,” she drawled with a grin. “Are you going to give me some spicy tidbits? I’ll share some I’ve had with Ethan.”

“You want to talk about our sex lives?”

“That’s what friends do. We share details.” She wiggled her eyebrows up and down.

Trying not to smile, I said, “You and Ethan really are perfect for each other.”

She sighed. “That man is my match, especially when we’re naked.”

I glanced around, hoping no one could hear us.

“You’re blushing like you’ve never gotten naked with your guys,” she said as she eyed me.

“I have,” I whispered. “Well, not with all of them.”

Her brows rose with intrigue. “Oh really? Who’s the one holding out?”

“Knox,” I blurted and winced. Maybe I shouldn’t have said that. Was it a betrayal to Knox to vent my frustration to someone else? Or would it be a good idea to get an outside perspective?

“Why do you think that is?” she asked, moving closer.

“I’m not exactly sure. I know he wants me as much as I want him, but something is clearly bothering him. I have a feeling that when he looks at me, he sees a broken, fragile girl. Maybe I am or was. I lost my family and up until recently, I wasn’t handling it the right way. But I am now. I’m working as hard as I can and what I need from them is to treat me normally—like I’m not broken and fragile, because if they can’t see me like that, then how will I?”

With sad eyes, she put her hand on my upper arm. “Do they all treat you like that? Have you tried talking to them?”

I nodded. “The other three have gotten better. Knox, though, I don’t know. He won’t talk to me. I’ve asked him if he wanted to take things slow and he said no, but the last couple of times we’ve kissed, things got heated and he got me so worked up, I just…I wanted…”

“You wished he’d bend you over and fuck you until you don’t know your own name?” Isabelle offered.

“Yes! And each time he pulls away, I’m left feeling like a sex-crazed teenager.”

“You have plenty of other guys to curb the horny hormones, so don’t let his rejection make you feel insecure,” she said. “And if he’s not ready to be intimate with you, then he shouldn’t lead you on like that.”

“When we’re in the moment, it’s as if he can’t help it. Like he so badly wants to forget what’s holding him back. He manages to until something jars his focus from me and he’s reminded.”

“Hmm,” she hummed as she appeared to ponder. “There are two ways you can handle this. You can continue to try and talk it out and hope you get through to him. Or, if you’re brave enough, seduce the stubborn bastard. Show him you can handle everything he’s got, because, Shi, you don’t need him or any of your guys to think you’re unbroken and strong to be that way. As long as you know it, that’s all that matters. And maybe if you believe it, then he will, too.”

I was a little taken aback as her words sank in. She was right. I shouldn’t need the guys to treat me normally to feel normal. It sure helped. But I shouldn’t have to look to them to gauge what I felt. I had to do it on my own.

“How would I seduce him?” I asked.

A big grin spread across her face. “What’s his favorite color?”

Before I could answer, my phone started ringing. “One sec,” I said to her, and she went back to sifting through the racks of costumes. I pulled my phone from my purse. The screen read Unknown. I still answered, thinking it might be Logan or Ian. “Hello?”

The line was quiet.

“Hello?” I said again, and when there still wasn’t an answer, I hung up.

Before I could put my phone back in my purse, it rang again.