Love Me (WITSEC #3)(46)

My shoulders slumped a little and I moved my fingers to his hair to massage his scalp. “And why is that?”

“Because I was planning on saying it. I had this whole speech thing I wanted to say to you,” he said, pulling away from my neck to face me.

“We can pretend I didn’t say anything.”

The corners of his mouth lifted. “I don’t want to.”

“But I want to hear your declaration of love,” I said with a fake pout.

He snorted. “I wanted to say that the best thing to ever happen to me was when you moved in next door. When I brought over your mail after the first time we met, you answered the door and you had flour all over your face, and I realized right then that I was going to fall for you and there was nothing I could do about it. I think I started falling for you when you came to our swim meet dressed as a cheerleader with our name on the back of your shirt. And I knew for certain that I had completely fallen at Ethan’s party. You smiled so much that night. You seemed so happy and carefree, and it was beautiful to see. The best part about that night was that you had ended it by calling me a cockblock.” He chuckled as if he was remembering it.

“I didn’t actually call you that,” I grumbled.

“It was heavily implied, my little ballbuster,” he said, with an adoring smile. “I love you, Shiloh.”

I bit my lip to keep myself from crying. “I love you, too.”

He kissed me and we just held each other for a while.

As we got dressed, in a low voice, Colt said, “My dad really wanted us to go to college. It’s why he pushed us all into sports. He hoped we’d be good enough to get scholarships because even though his business was successful, it was still a lot to send four kids to college. He and my mom had been saving for us to go originally, but then she got sick, and my dad had to use that money for all the medical expenses.

“Creed had been the one to pick swimming and I figured, why not? It beat getting tackled over a ball or being stuck out in the heat, and turns out I was good at it. We both were. Creed was passionate when it came to the sport, but I’ve always looked at it as another responsibility because it made my dad proud.” He looked up at his trophies he had displayed on a shelf. “I needed him to be proud. Because I thought if he was proud, then he was happy, and if he was happy, he couldn’t be sad. After my mom died, he became this walking shell for almost two years. When he would look at us, there was just nothing in his eyes. No emotion. I know it sounds stupid, but I was scared that if he ever got sad again, he would turn back into that shell. So if Dad wanted me to play a sport, I’d play a sport. If he wanted me to get straight As, then I got straight As. If he wanted me to go to college, I’d go to college. If he needed me to keep an eye on Creed or make sure Creed doesn’t do this or say that or get into trouble, then I’d do it. I did everything he expected of me.”

“Then he died,” I said as gently as I could.

Colt nodded. “There was a moment after he died where I asked myself, what was the point? Why was I continuing to work this hard or strive for a goal that wasn’t mine to begin with? I felt really lost for a time. I didn’t leave the team because I didn’t want to disappoint Creed. After the gym was up and running and started bringing in money, I overheard Knox and Keelan talking one evening. They had created college funds for Creed and me and they were talking over how much they could afford to pay into them each month. Then I overheard them say that if Creed and I got scholarships from swimming, then by the time we graduated, they’d have enough saved for us to go to college without worry.”

He sat on the edge of the bed and took my hand. “I don’t give a shit about other people or if I disappoint them. It’s the ones I care about. You and my brothers. You are the ones I don’t want to disappoint.”

I squeezed his hand. “Your brothers love you and want you to be happy. I’m sure they created that college fund for you because they thought that was your goal and they were trying to do whatever they could to help you reach that goal. If you’re honest with them and tell them that it isn’t your goal, I know they will understand. Or if you do want to go to college, but hate being on the swim team, we’ll figure something else out. And by we, I mean me, too. I’ll help you look into other options to help pay for school.” I stepped closer and wrapped my arms around his waist. “I can confidently say that none of us want you to continue doing something you hate because you don’t want to disappoint us. Imagine if our roles were reversed. How would you feel about that?”

He tucked my hair behind my ear and gave me a sweet kiss. “Thank you.”





13





The next day, after school, I went shopping with Isabelle. I wanted to give the guys some time alone. Last night before bed, Colt had announced that he wanted to have a talk with his brothers. Without hesitation, they had agreed. Keelan had suggested that they go out and do something. Creed had come up with some ideas, like paintballing and going to dinner. Knox had rescheduled things workwise, so that he only had to work a half-day and would be present by the time the twins got out of school. I loved how they prioritized being there for Colt, and I hoped he saw that and it made talking to them a lot easier for him.

“How’d the interview go yesterday?” I asked Isabelle as we walked through a costume shop.