Jane Doe(49)

CHAPTER 33

My mom called again. I blocked her. Good riddance.

This time in Minneapolis is really helping me work out my issues. I feel more in touch with my feelings already.

That was a joke.





CHAPTER 34

It’s Thursday and I feel like a girl getting ready for her wedding night. Instead of white, I wear black, of course. Steven’s favorite black bra and a pair of transparent mesh panties. I’ve unbuttoned my delicate dress too far again, but whenever I catch Steven’s eye across the office, I smile and look shyly down, a blushing bride.

He’s practically strutting through the day. Tonight he’ll accept the precious gift of my womanhood. If only this weren’t an office romance, he could shout it to the world.

He leaves a few minutes before I do, but he’s waiting by his truck when I come down. “Ready for dinner?” he asks with a wink.

I nod and duck my head as he opens my door. I can’t quite meet his eyes.

“I’m making burgers,” he says. “Sound good?” He closes the door on my quiet “Yes.”

We pull out and he takes my hand. After kissing my knuckles, he laces his fingers through mine and holds my hand on his thigh. I play my part by not jerking my arm back to my side of the truck.

After a few minutes I clear my throat. “I’m not very good at it,” I say in a rushed whisper.

“At what?” Steven shoots me a puzzled glance.

“I . . . I mean sex. I’m not really . . . It’s hard for me to relax about it.”

He huffs out a laugh and shakes his head. “It’ll be great.”

“I don’t know.”

“Listen, Jane.” We’re waiting in line at a long red light. He turns to me, raising my hand for another kiss. “I’m in love with you.”

“Oh gosh. Steven! Oh my gosh! I love you too. I really do. I know it’s only been a few weeks, but . . .”

“But it’s something special. This isn’t some cheap one-night stand like you’ve had before. It’s going to mean something. All right?”

Wow. Can it ever really be special with a trashy girl like me? Stay tuned.

But this is what Meg wanted. I know that. She was so sick of dating. So sick of the constant grind. She wanted someone who’d tell her it was special. Someone to cuddle in the morning. Someone to hold hands with in the car.

My hand is sweaty and I desperately want it back, but I keep right on squeezing.

“Relax, baby,” he murmurs. “It’s gonna be so good.”

I smile nervously, but I nod in agreement because I want to please him.

He glances toward my chest. “You wore that bra I like.”

This time my smile is wide and sure. “I wanted to make you happy.”

“Oh, I’m already feeling real happy, babe. Come here.” I lean in and give him a kiss, but the light turns green and the car behind us honks. We giggle like teenagers and drive out of the city.

When we get to his house, Steven heads straight out to the grill. As soon as he’s out the patio door, I grab two beers from the fridge, one stout and one light. After popping the tops off both, I drop four pills into the stout and swirl them around. It’s bitter enough that he won’t notice any difference.

When he comes back inside, I sidle up for a long, deep kiss, sucking lightly at his tongue until he groans. “Here, sweetie. I got you a beer.”

“You’re amazing.”

He’s in a great mood, nicer than he’s ever been. “I should cook for you next time,” I say.

“Yeah? What would you make for me?”

“Beef stroganoff?”

“Ick. Mushrooms.”

“Okay, then . . . fried chicken.”

“That sounds wonderful.”

I don’t know shit about fried chicken. “I promise to make all your favorites. I can’t wait.”

He clinks his beer against mine. “Drink up. We can’t have you feeling uptight tonight, can we?”

I giggle and shake my head, then take a long pull on my beer as he supervises with a pleased smile. “Good girl.”

“You’re good at watching out for me,” I purr.

“It’s nice to find a woman who appreciates that.”

“I do. I really like it. The way you take care of me.” I lean up for another kiss and he pushes me back to the counter so he can press his hips to mine for a few seconds.

“God, you’re hot.”

I take another drink of beer as he leaves me to go to the fridge. “Cheese?” he asks. He sets cheese and ground beef on the counter, then leans back and finishes his first beer. I hope he swallowed all the pills in that last long pull.

He gets us both another beer and slides mine across the counter toward me even though I haven’t finished the first.

“Maybe I could cook and you could have your dad and Rhonda over or something.”

“That sounds nice, but we wouldn’t want my dad to think we’re shacking up or anything.”

“Oh, right. Sorry.”

“It was a sweet thought. You’re going to make a great wife someday.”

“Stop. Don’t tease.”

“I’m not teasing you, babe. I’d like to settle down soon, and I’d love it to be with a girl who wants to be a wife and not just a husband in a dress.”