Indefinite (Salvation #6)(57)

Erin is surrounded by her family and friends, who are also her family. Quinn sits in the front row with Charlie, Gretchen, Ben, Natalie, and Liam. His eyes stay on mine, and I see so much love I could cry. I watch as Quinn’s gaze moves down to my belly where, thanks to this dress, you can see that I have a little bump.

At first, I thought I would hate the idea of being fat, but when that little bump became visible right before Gretchen’s wedding two weeks ago, I decided I couldn’t wait to get bigger. Quinn couldn’t make it to the wedding since he had to take care of something for work. I was pissed, but then I was grateful he wasn’t gone for longer than a few days.

“And do you promise to help guide the child through Christ?” the minister asks.

“Yes,” Mark and I both answer in unison.

Just like that, she’s baptized.

Everyone hugs, and Erin is placed back into her mother’s arms. Quinn heads right toward me. “You okay?”

He’s so overprotective, it’s nuts. I hope we have a boy because, if it’s a girl, he may end up building an ivory tower to stick her in. “I’m fine.” His hand goes to my belly, and I feel his warmth through the dress. “The baby is fine too.”

“Can you feel it?”

“No.” I laugh. “We’re way too early for that. I’m just saying it for your benefit.”

“Oh, well, okay then.”

He’s been really cute. After Gretchen’s wedding, I took a leave of absence from work because I needed to figure out where we’ll end up. I have about five months of sick and vacation time saved, and once that runs out, I’ll hopefully have a better plan.

“Soon we’ll be there, though.”

“I’m excited for it.”

I don’t know why it took an explosion to literally rock his world, but Quinn isn’t the same. Since being out of the navy, there’s a calmness to him. He’s still excited about us and the baby, but he smiles more. He’s not worried about leaving, and I hope he’s content.

The last thing I want is for him to feel suffocated.

“You seem happy,” I tell him while touching his cheek.

“I am.”

“Do you miss the military?”

Quinn shrugs. “I miss some of the guys on my team, but I’m getting to work with a new team.” He hooks his arm around my shoulders, and we start to walk out of the church.

“Well, happy looks good on you,” I tell him.

“You looked beautiful with a baby in your arms,” Quinn says and then kisses my temple.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

It felt good. I held Erin, and everything inside me settled. It’s everything I’ve wanted and now I’m going to have it . . . with a man I love. It seems like the world is smiling down on me.





“So”—Natalie grabs my hand—“you guys seem like you’re doing great.”

“We are.”

“Quinn has changed, Ash. I see it in him, and I’m so happy.”

I smile and lean back, sipping my water. “He really has. I keep wondering if maybe he regrets having a sort of instant family, but he has taken to living with me and preparing for a kid.”

She nods. “He’s definitely shocked Liam and me. I waited for a freak-out or something, but he just talks about how ready he is.”

“Was Liam that way?”

Natalie looks over at him, her eyes turn wistful. “Liam is one in a million, but he’s not without fault. When we got together, we had so much shit to overcome. I was married to his best friend, for one, and we thought Aaron was dead, so we were both grieving.”

“I can’t imagine.”

“It was hard and I worried because Liam walked into an already established family. Aarabelle was a baby, and at the same time, it was as if he were competing with the ghost of Aaron. He stuck it out, though, and Quinn looks at you the same way that Liam would stare at me.”

“I worry there are ghosts in his past too. With his shit family his trauma from serving, all these changes have to be hard on him. I mean he ended his career with the navy not even a few weeks ago and now he has a baby on the way. I don’t know . . .”

These are things I’ve worried about but haven’t given a voice to. He’s been so happy, that I didn’t want to jinx it. There are these moments, though. Times when he looks a little lost in New York. When he’s working and focused on a task—he comes alive.

More than ever, I think I need to prepare to make the move to Virginia Beach. He’s given up so much for me, and I want to show him that I’m just as devoted to making this work as he is.

“They all have things in their past,” Natalie says softly. “Losing friends the way they have changed them. It’s not something that you’ll ever get used to seeing.”

“It couldn’t have been easy.”

Quinn hasn’t said much since the night he explained a very small amount of what happened. He doesn’t talk about King or the guys who were in the accident. I haven’t pushed. Maybe it’s because things have been so good, and the last thing I want to do is screw that up.

“No, it’s never easy for any of them, but I’m glad he woke up and saw what he had in front of him before it was too late,” Natalie says with a smile. “I love Quinn like a brother. Not to mention he and Liam are thick as thieves, but I’ve always wanted more for him. I guess it’s because I have everything I could’ve ever wanted and hope for the same for all the boys.”