Heartache and Hope (Heartache Duet #1)(71)

He kisses me quickly. “Love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Rhys says, “I love you both; now hurry the fuck up.”

Connor kisses me again. “Can I message you when I get home? Maybe get that goodnight kiss?”

I nod. “Hey. No talking to girls tonight,” I joke.

“Yes, ma’am,” he says, kissing me again before opening the car door.

“You’re so whipped,” Rhys remarks.

“I don’t mind it.” Connor laughs. “Besides, she knows how to dispose of a dead body with little to no evidence. And I like breathing. It’s fun.”





Mom’s stirred twice since I put her to bed, but she hasn’t fully woken, which is an improvement from the previous nights.

It’s close to midnight, and I’m working on these stupid college applications when a text comes through.

Connor: I is home, woman. Kiss me.

Ava: Are you drunk? Come to my window. BE QUIET.





I open my blinds, lift the window and rest my elbows on the frame, half out, looking for him. He appears, a silhouette lit only by the phone he’s looking at. “Connor,” I hiss.

“One second.” His thumbs are moving, and so is he, closer and closer. When he gets to my window, he finally looks up. “God, you’re beautiful,” he mumbles at the same time my phone goes off.

Connor: I be there soon.





I drop the phone, reach out and pull him toward me with the ties of his hood. “How much did you have to drink?”

He shrugs, his eyes hooded. “Just a couple beers to take the edge off. I’m not drunk.”

I eye him sideways. “How many girls did you talk to tonight?”

“Twelve.”

“That’s an oddly specific number.”

“I made it up. No girls.” He shakes his head. Then he reaches up, holds my entire head in his grasp. With his eyes on mine, he says, a seriousness taking over him, “You’re the only girl for me, Ava Elizabeth Diana.” He kisses me, soft and sweet, and then pulls away. “Can you turn your light on?”

“Why?”

“I always wonder what your room’s like, and every time I come here, it’s dark. I just want to see… maybe I could come in? Just for a few minutes?”

Biting down on my lip, I hesitate before nodding. “You have to be quiet, okay? My mom’s asleep.”

He draws a cross over his heart, and I lift my window higher so he can fit through. I step back, watch him climb in, first his arms, then his upper body, and then he’s army crawling across my floor with his legs still out the window. When he’s all the way in, his feet hit the floor with a thud. “Connor!” I whisper-yell, my finger to my lips as I listen for any movement. I’m not sure what would be worse, Mom waking or Trevor knowing there’s a boy in my room.

“Sorry.” He grimaces. “That was harder than it looked.”

I switch on the light on my nightstand and watch him look around my room. There’s nothing in here but my bed, desk, and bookshelf. “It’s… different from what I imagined.”

“What did you imagine?” I ask, sitting on the edge of my bed.

He sits down next to me, his giant frame almost comical on such a small bed. “I don’t really know.”

“It was supposed to be temporary,” I admit, looking down at my feet, shame washing through me. “We weren’t supposed to be here this long. I guess part of me was hoping for a miracle. Maybe William would come back and save us or—”

“Ava,” he interrupts, nudging my side. “You forget we live next door. My dad works full-time and only has me to worry about, and that’s all he can afford. There’s nothing wrong with where we live, and that’s not what I was getting at. I just meant that… I don’t know. I thought there’d be pictures on the walls or something.”

Not in here, I don’t say. “Of what? All my imaginary friends?”

He sighs, rubs his eye with the heel of his palm. “Rhys is your friend.”

“Rhys feels sorry for me.”

“Karen misses you.”

I can’t help the flash of jealousy that knots my stomach. “You talk to Karen?”

“I mean, sometimes. I talked to her tonight.”

My voice cracks when I ask, “About me?”

He settles his hand on my leg, and I can’t help but think that his guilt put it there. “She asked about you. About us. And I told her how much I love you.”

His answer is perfect. Too perfect. My old insecurities come back to me, and I swallow the lump in my throat.

“Ava,” he says through a sigh. “What’s wrong?”

I don’t look up when I answer, “Nothing.”

He sighs again, this one heavier. “Are you mad that I went out tonight?”

“No.”

“Because I needed it, Ava. I need to get the guys on my side so I can… I’ve just been under a lot of stress, and I just wanted a night out, but the whole time I was there, all I wanted was to be with you, and now I’m here and...”

And I couldn’t even be there for him if I wanted to. I’m not able to carry his stress like he carries my pain. I turn to him. “I’m sorry I haven’t been there.”