Code Name: Nanny (SEAL and Code Name #5)(22)

Tate pulled Cara closer, muttering a graphic curse. “What did you do?”

“At first, I told myself it was a mistake. If only we could talk, everything would be fine. So I went to see him after hours at his office.” Her voice fell. “I must have made a lovely sight—eyes red from crying, throat raw. I think I stopped eating for a while, too.”

Tate’s fingers tightened. “What happened?”

“Nothing, because I never saw him. I heard him inside, but he wouldn’t open the door. I started pounding and . . . and the next thing I knew, I was sitting in a cruiser with a campus police officer, being threatened with arrest. My friendly professor had reported one of his female students was stalking him, and that she was mentally unbalanced. God knows I must have looked unhinged that night. My world was in pieces, and suddenly I had a child to plan for.”

Tate kissed her damp cheeks, his face grim. “I only wish I’d known. I’d have killed him.”

Neither noticed the roar of traffic streaming past. “And you would have ruined a wonderful career for nothing. I left school not long after.”

“I remember. One Monday you weren’t in class, and we heard that you’d transferred.”

“Not true.” After a long time Cara sighed, her face streaked with tears. “You’re not going to ask me the truth?”

“The truth is that you survived. Now you have one of the most important jobs in San Francisco and two beautiful children. I have no reason to question whatever choices you made that day, since they brought you where you are right now.” His voice softened. “Here in my arms.”

“I’m glad you won’t ask, because I did the only thing I felt I could, Tate. I have no regrets about that decision.” Cara sat up straighter. “I went to a clinic in Mexico, and I was assured all records would remain sealed.”

A car horn screamed. Two SUVs came perilously close to colliding as they changed lanes nearby.

Cara stared blindly at the passing cars. “I accept the responsibility for what I did, but I won’t cause more pain to you or to my family. Dear God, if the press blows this up, it would devastate Audra and Sophy.”

With a soft curse Tate turned her around to face him. “Someone found out.” He cupped her wet cheeks, his expression as fierce as his touch was gentle. “Someone’s threatening you with this, aren’t they?”

Cara didn’t move, didn’t speak. Her whole body felt cold. After what seemed like an eternity, she nodded. “I’m afraid so.”

“When, Cara? And why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“Because it’s my problem. I’m not going to become a liability to you, Tate.”

He cradled her face between hands that shook. “I love you. That’s now and forever, and your problems are my problems. I also love your two girls, and you’d better get used to that, too, because I’m in your life to stay.”

“You’re not listening, Tate. This could ruin you.” Cara took a raw breath. “You’re a wonderful man—even more rare, you’re an honest politician. This country needs you in the Senate and, God willing, at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. I refuse to involve you in this.” She wiped blindly at her cheeks with the cuff of her jacket.

“Let me get this straight. The wedding’s off,” he said quietly. “To protect me, so I can be a force for fairness and decency?”

She nodded.

“To ensure my future happiness?”

“It’s the right thing to do, Tate.”

“The hell it is, because I have no chance at future happiness without you, Cara. What does it take to convince you of that?”

“I won’t argue.” She sat back stiffly. “My mind is made up.”

“Do you love me?”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

His fingers tightened. “Do you love me?”

When she looked into his eyes, the pain she saw there almost made her lose her resolve. But Cara had seen enough lurid headlines to know that her secret could be twisted, blown up in a way that would shatter Tate’s political future. If she married him now, it would cause more pain and harm. She would alienate his family and staff, and one day he would wake up hating her.

She couldn’t bear the thought.

“Don’t push me, Tate. What I feel for you—what I will always feel for you—is irrelevant. I need to do what’s right, not what feels good.”

“If you think Costello is behind this, turn his appeal over to a colleague.”

“I can’t be sure that he’s the one. I have probably sixty cases on my desk now, and hundreds more already closed.” She laughed tensely. “A lot of people hate my guts, you know. I’m certain Costello will always have a vendetta against me.”

“Then I’ll hire a private investigator. We’ll fly down to that clinic in Mexico and see who’s been sniffing around. We can start planning our strategy tonight at the house.”

“Haven’t you heard anything I’ve said? The wedding is off, Tate. For your protection, you shouldn’t be seen with me.”

“Like hell. Tonight we’ll talk with my contact and decide what to do next.” His voice was calm, utterly implacable.

“I won’t ruin your future, Tate. The answer is no.”