Candy Cane Murder (Hannah Swensen #9.5)(18)

Joanne Fluke

breathing human beings and turned into part of the woodwork.

“You bet I used it,” Lisa replied with a grin. “When you first told me about it, I thought you were crazy, but it works every time I do it. I didn’t hear anything though, not unless you want to count Cyril Murphy’s crazy theory about what happened to Wayne.”

“What’s Cyril’s theory?”

“The part I heard had to do with alien abductions gone bad.”

“I didn’t know Cyril believed in aliens!”

Lisa shrugged. “It doesn’t surprise me. It’s a lot like believing in the Little People. Cyril tells everybody he believes in them.”

“He’s Irish. He has to say he believes in Leprechauns even if he doesn’t. It goes with the territory along with the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, kissing the Blarney stone, and drinking green beer on St. Patrick’s Day. What did you hear Cyril say?”

“I have to tell you what happened first.”

“Okay.” Hannah motioned to a stool at the stainless steel work counter and Lisa sat down. “Go ahead.”

“Cyril came in with Brigit and they sat at a table with Rick and Jessica,” Lisa named Cyril’s wife, oldest son, and daughterin-law. “Jessica was talking about how nice Sally’s party was and how much fun they were having until Mike came over and put Rick to work interviewing everybody.”

“Go on.”

“Then Brigit asked Rick for more particulars about how Wayne died, and Rick told her he wasn’t supposed to give out any information. And Brigit wanted to know why not since Jake and Kelly had announced on KCOW that it was a massive blow to the back of the head that had caved in Wayne’s skull and caused his death.”

Hannah made a mental note to try to get her hands on the crime scene photos. If she remembered correctly, Wayne had CANDY CANE MURDER

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been wearing his Santa hat when she found him. The hat was made of thick, furry red material and it had a wide cuff of white fur all the way around it. The blow must have been delivered with considerable force to cave in Wayne’s skull right through his padded hat.

“Then they started to talk about who could have killed Wayne. Rick didn’t say much and I figured he was a little uncomfortable about maybe leaking some information without meaning to do it, but Jessica and Brigit were talking about all the people Wayne had overcharged at the store. And then Cyril spoke up and said he knew exactly how Wayne had died, and the killer was going to get away with it.”

“That’s when the subject of alien abduction came up?”

Hannah guessed.

“That’s right. But first Cyril asked them if they’d noticed how bright the moon was last night. And they all said they’d noticed.”

“Cyril’s right about that. I noticed it, and so did Andrea and Michelle. We even commented on it when we were walking to the parking lot.”

“Well, Cyril said the reason it was that bright was because the aliens were refracting the moon’s energy with the hull of their giant space ship. And what they’d thought was the moon was really the hull of the ship.”

Hannah snorted. She couldn’t help it. “Oh, boy!”

“That’s not all. Cyril claimed that the aliens practiced thought control on Wayne, drawing him off the path and making him climb up the side of that steep snow bank.”

“Why would they do that?”

“That’s what Jessica asked him. And Cyril said the reason they wanted Wayne to climb up to the top was so they could take a better look at him.”

“They were too nearsighted to see him on the ground?”

Hannah’s grin grew wider.

“I guess so. Or maybe they just didn’t refract enough of the moon’s energy to light him up.” Lisa gave a little giggle.

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Joanne Fluke

“Anyway, that was when Brigit had to leave the table. She pretended to have a bad cough, but I could tell she was laughing.”

“Can’t blame Brigit for that.”

“I know. I almost lost it, too. But Cyril kept right on talking. He said that when the aliens caught sight of the white fur on Wayne’s Santa costume, they assumed he was an animal instead of a human. And since they had already abducted enough animals, they pushed him back down the snow bank.”

“Killing him in the process?”

“That’s what Cyril said. Is he crazy, or what?”

Hannah was about to agree that the master mechanic who fixed her cookie truck had slipped several cogs. But before she could say that, she remembered a small notice she’d read in the Lake Eden Journal. The Wolf Pack Lodge would be holding their annual Whopper Contest next week. If she remembered correctly, Cyril had won last year with his story about how the porcupine got its quills. “He’s not crazy,” she said.

“He’s not? ”

“No, he’s just practicing for the Whopper Contest.”

Lisa rolled her eyes. “I don’t think it’s very nice to joke about murder. Of course Cyril isn’t exactly mourning Wayne Bergstrom, either.”

“What do you mean?”

“Herb said they got into a really big fight a couple of days ago at the garage. Herb was picking up his squad car and there they were really going at it. Cyril was accusing Wayne of trying to put him out of business, and they were yelling, and shaking their fists, and … oh, gosh!” Lisa stopped speaking and her mouth dropped open. When she recovered enough to speak again, she raised shocked eyes to Hannah. “You don’t think that … ?”