Broken Trust: A Dark High School Romance(53)

Each of them was so in sync that they didn’t even have to speak. They just handed the food around, shared their life, and had each other’s backs. The loyalty I could see between the four of them … it said a lot. It told me that they were not the type to betray someone they cared about. Not easily at least.

More of Beck’s argument from last time ran through my head. He’d said it was Dante or me, and he chose me.

I understood that. I really did. But why couldn’t they have talked to me? Warned me at least so I was a tiny bit prepared.

“It really hurt me,” I said suddenly, and their conversations immediately ceased. Suddenly, I was their sole focus. “Not that I had to kill someone and you all didn’t give me a heads-up, but that I had to go through it alone. I’d thought we were a team. Stupidly. I trusted you four, even when everything in the world was telling me that you were bad news, and then you proved the fucking universe right by screwing me.” I eyed Beck. “One of you literally.”

He opened his mouth, but I cut him off before he could speak. “I’ve never run from the darkness in your world. If anything, I have embraced the assassination attempts, almost dying, being hunted down like animals, dealing with Catherine, and every other fucked up part of this world. I embraced it all because from the moment that plane crashed into the forest, I haven’t felt alone.”

My voice broke, and I tried my hardest to get it together, but I couldn’t seem to. “My parents were ripped out of my world in an instant. A split second, some black ice, and I was an orphan. Alone. Even having Dante in my life couldn’t come close to healing the hole that left in my soul, but you four … you made me feel like I had a family again.”

I broke off, my head falling forward as tears dripped onto my clenched hands. “I’m not sure I can let you all back in like that again. I won’t survive losing you a second time.”

I could practically feel Beck vibrating at my side. Dylan was doing the same, and when I looked up, Evan and Jasper were wearing twin expressions of devastation. Until this point I wasn’t sure any of them quite understood how much they had hurt me. How far they had broken me with their actions.

But … it seemed they might finally understand.

“We don’t deserve your forgiveness,” Dylan said softly, his voice rough. “There was nothing we could have done to stop you from having to cater to Delta’s fucked up world, but we could have prepared you. We could have stood at your side instead of on the opposite side. That is on us.”

Beck nodded. “I thought I was protecting you,” he said, his voice a wash of dark emotions. “That if you went in blind you wouldn’t do anything to raise Delta’s suspicions. You wouldn’t do anything to get yourself hurt.”

I had to look at him, I couldn’t help myself. His eyes were boring into mine

“I never for a second thought you would assume we’d deliberately lured you into our world. I thought you would trust in us. That you’d know we were doing everything we could to protect you, while not raising our parents’ suspicions.”

I’d hurt Beck as well, that much was clear as he sat there, looking a little broken, too.

“Dante was not the smartest move,” I told him softly, my tears finally drying up. “My anger over that ... it clouded my judgement.”

Fire flared in Beck’s gaze, and I was confused for a beat as I tried to figure out what had triggered that. “Dante was the best choice,” he said coldly. “Not only is he aware of this world and the mess of rules we have to follow, he was the one guaranteed to make you act fast and not fuck around. Our parents are insane, and they would have hurt you to get their own way.”

Aware of this world. Did Beck mean simply because I was part of Delta and had shared some things with my best friend. Or because he was a bit of a fan of their company and its rise to power? Or maybe even a slight reference to the Grims and his place there?

Or was there something else…?

“You know you’re one of us, Riley,” Evan said seriously, that more subdued side that he hid so well in public, appearing again. “It doesn’t matter what you do, or say, or how many ways you fuck up. You’re always one of us.”

“Unconditional,” Beck added. “Our bond is unconditional.”

The four of them reached out to me, almost like they were sealing that statement with one huge handshake. I hesitated, but only for a heartbeat. Unconditional was pretty rare in life, and if they were offering me that, then I could meet them all halfway.

“Unconditional,” I murmured, my hand joining theirs. My eyes met Beck’s. “We still need to talk,” I told him, and he nodded, looking more relaxed than I’d seen him in a long time.

After that I managed to eat and drink my coffee, the mug lovingly packed back in the box Beck had brought with him. “I know we could get them for every house,” Dylan said, as he wrapped each one gently, “but then it kind of loses that special touch.”

I snorted. “You’re all a bunch of softies underneath, aren’t you?”

Leaning down, he pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “Only around you, Riles.”

He stared down at me for a beat longer than was necessary in this situation, and I recalled the stunned way he’s acted after I’d ambushed him with a kiss last night. I was just about to ask him if everything was okay with us, when we were interrupted by Evan.