Breathless (Steel Brothers Saga #10)(24)

“Don’t even start, for God’s sake. Just sit down at the table and let me pour you a cup of coffee. Did you ever consider the fact that maybe you got here before they did? Maybe you’re excited to hear their proposal?”

Again, I said nothing and sat down at the table as she instructed. A few seconds later, a steaming cup of black coffee was thrust in front of me.

“I’m going to take a quick shower. When my brothers get here, just tell them you let yourself in. I’ll even tell them I left the door unlocked for you. Got it?”

I nodded, feeling like the world’s biggest asshole.

“Also, tell them I’ll make some breakfast when I’m done.”

I nodded again. Then I simply sat, taking a sip of coffee that burned my tongue, and waited. Waited for two of the Steel brothers to show up for our meeting. And I knew, as soon as they saw my face, they'd be able to tell I’d fucked their little sister.

I’d made such a big mistake.

As much as I wanted to, though, I couldn’t bring myself to regret what had occurred. In fact, as much as I knew I wasn’t ready to offer Marjorie Steel anything close to what she deserved, all I could think about was getting back into her bed.

Which meant only one thing. Even though I needed the work, I had to turn down whatever the Steels were about to offer me. I couldn’t be around Marjorie. Our need for each other was too great. I would never be able to resist her, so the only choice I had was to stay away from her.

Far, far away from her.

I looked up when the door opened. A few seconds later, Jonah Steel, my best friend in the world, walked into the kitchen.

“Bryce, you’re early. What’s wrong with this picture?” He laughed.

Not too obvious. I’d never been known for my punctuality.

“Just interested to hear what you guys want to talk to me about.”

“I thought Tal filled you in a little.”

“He did.” I cleared my throat. “But I’m still curious. About the details. You know.”

Joe smiled. “We’re hoping to welcome you aboard here. Ryan should be here soon. Is there any more coffee?”

I cleared my throat again. “I don’t know. Marjorie poured me this cup and then excused herself to go take a shower. She said she’d make us breakfast when she was done.”

“Great. I’m starved. We’ll call this second breakfast, like the hobbits do. My first breakfast was at five thirty. So how are you holding up?”

Nothing like getting right to the point. Oh, I’m a huge mess. Such a huge mess that I took advantage of your baby sister last night. Right in the room that used to have unicorns on the wall.

Yeah. Couldn’t really say that.

“I’m good.”

“Your mom still okay?”

“The same. Henry helps a lot. She’s pretty much taken over.” I sighed. “I miss him, actually.”

“You’re his father. Take back the reins.”

“She needs him right now. And he adores her.”

“He adores you too. Don’t stop being his dad just because his grandma needs something to focus on.”

I nodded. What else could I do? I didn’t want to tell Joe that I was so much a shadow of my former self that I didn’t feel I could be a father to my son. What if I turned into my own father? No, couldn’t even begin to go there. I could never put my son in harm’s way. I’d leave him first.

“It’s working for now, Joe. I’m doing the best I can.”

“I hear you asked Tal to make you a hand around here.”

“I did.”

“And that’s when he told you about what we were considering.”

“Yeah.”

“I get it, Bryce. You want to work your body to a pulp so you can forget everything that went down, if only through exhaustion. But buddy, it won’t work. Been there, done that.”

“With all due respect, your father wasn’t a psychopath.”

“Maybe not, but he sure fucked up as a dad.”

“Please.” I scoffed. “Don’t compare our situations.”

“I’m not. But take a look. Be thankful. You’re strong and healthy, and you have a strong and healthy kid. And whatever else your father did, he was around for you when you needed him, and he never abused you.”

“That’s supposed to make me feel better?” I stood. “Christ, Joe. Give me a break.”

“Hey. Sit back down.” He gestured. “I didn’t mean to cross any line. No one knows better than I do the guilt of being the one who wasn’t abused.”

I nodded. Joe was right. He’d harbored immense guilt for decades over not accompanying Talon that fateful day.

By my psycho father and two other equally psycho dicks.

“Luke, Joe. And all those other kids. Names I’ll never know. Colin Morse. My father destroyed them. Why not me?”

“I don’t know. I wish I had answers. All we can do in this life is play the hand we’re dealt. It is what it is.”

“Am I supposed to feel lucky?”

Joe took a sip of coffee and paused a moment. Then, “I don’t know. I often thought the same thing. I never felt lucky, though.”

“I don’t either.”