Brazen and the Beast (The Bareknuckle Bastards #2)(96)

There was no denial in Devil’s eyes. No humor, either.

“I am nothing like what she deserves. Born the bastard son of the worst kind of man, raised in a bed-sit in Holborn, then raised again in the filth and fights of the gutter.” He paused. Then, “And Ewan. I can’t ask her to live in his shadow.”

One of Devil’s dark brows kicked up. “I’m not sure Henrietta Sedley is the kind of woman who lives in anyone’s shadow. I heard she nearly took out Michael Doolan with a blade stolen from you.”

“She was ready to slice him to bits.”

Devil smirked. “Good thing you came along.”

“Don’t twist it,” he said. “She’s not like us. She doesn’t fight dirty. She’s so clean, it’s impossible to imagine how I wouldn’t drag her into the gutter if I touched her.”

“So far above you, you can barely see her,” Devil said softly. The words full of memory.

“Yes,” Whit said, looking down at the empty street below.

“And what does the lady say?”

How could I forget this? Had she known what they’d had? How rare it had been? It didn’t matter, because he’d ruined it. He’d made her feel like a chore.

As though he wouldn’t spend the rest of his days chasing the pleasure he’d felt with her.

I can’t love you.

I never asked you for love.

“Have you told her?” Devil interrupted. “About the past?”

He met his brother’s eyes. “I’m not good enough for her.”

Devil shook his head. “You’re wrong, but I’ve never been able to convince you of it. Neither has Grace. But listen to me, bruv. You’re the best of the lot of us.”

Shame flared at the words and Whit looked away. “That’s not true. I couldn’t keep you safe.” He stopped, thinking of the night they’d run. “I couldn’t keep my mother safe. And I can’t keep Hattie safe.”

Devil sighed. “Ewan is an ass, but he’s always been the smartest of the three of us. And he’s always known where our weaknesses lie.” A pause, and then, “I thought I was like the duke.”

Whit’s head snapped up at the confession. “You’re nothing like him.”

“Most days, I know that. And here is what I wish you could see.” His amber eyes glittered with frustration and insistence. “I wish you could see that the Mad Duke of Marwick is threatening your happiness for the second time in your life, and this time you have something far more devastating on the line.”

Hattie.

“And I wish you could see that you didn’t simply punish yourself in the last few days; you punished Hattie. And worse, you made her choice for her.” He reached a hand to his brother’s shoulder. “You are more than our savior.”

Whit closed his eyes, remembering the night they’d run. “I could barely move. You should have left me.”

“No.” Devil came to his full height. “You were one of us. Ewan came for us all that night. Ewan, who is lost, and the duke, who is dead, and it is time for you to realize that without you, Grace and I would be nowhere. It’s time for you to realize that without you, the Rookery would be nowhere. The men wouldn’t have jobs and the women wouldn’t have pride and the children wouldn’t have lemon ice every time we have a ship in harbor. And that’s you. I didn’t build that. I was too angry and too vengeful. You built it. Because you’ve always looked out for us. And you shall always be the best of us.”

The words hung between them, until Devil added, “Henrietta Sedley might be the best woman the world has ever seen, but don’t for one second believe that you are not her equal.”

You made me your equal.

Hattie’s words, full of awe.

Whit’s own disbelief.

“I can’t convince you of it,” Devil said softly, wrapping his hand around Whit’s head and pulling him close, until their foreheads touched. “And, sadly, neither can she.”

Whit took a deep breath. “I can’t keep her safe.”

“No.” Devil shook his head. “It’s the worst truth. But loving them is the best.”

Loving Hattie.

“I’m sorry to break up what looks like a beautiful moment, but we’ve a problem.”

The brothers looked up to find Annika crossing the rooftop, tall and blond, her coat billowing in the wind and her brow furrowed like she was in the midst of an Oslo winter.

“Nik!” Devil said, releasing Whit from his grasp, turning with a wide grin on his face. “You will not believe the rumors I’ve been hearing.”

Nik’s didn’t look to him. “I don’t care.”

“I hear you’ve a new friend.”

The Norwegian stilled and looked to Whit, pleading in her eyes. “Tell him to shut up.”

Whit couldn’t help his own smile, welcome after the events of the last few days. “Where were you twenty minutes ago when he came up here? I would have liked for him to do the same.”

“One of the boys told me you brought a certain fast driver up to the roof to show her the stars last night,” Devil said.

Nik cleared her throat. “It was to make amends for your fledgling criminals stealing her gig in the first place.”