Bitter Sweet Heart (Lies, Hearts & Truths #2)(93)

“I just don’t know how to handle this,” she admits.

“Your son just came out and your daughter is going to be living in sin soon, I’m pretty sure you can handle me dating an older woman.”

“River being gay wasn’t a surprise to anyone, least of all me. You being involved with your professor . . . Maybe it also shouldn’t be a surprise, but it is.” She sighs.

I nod. “I need to check in with Clover and see how she’s doing. I don’t want her to be on her own tonight.” Might as well keep on with the honesty—and prevent my parents from inviting themselves inside to continue this discussion.

“I’ll call you tomorrow, okay? So you can update me,” Dad says. “And if there are concerns about this husband of hers, please tell us so we can help.”

I nod once and let him pull me in for an awkward hug before I get out. My mom slides along the back seat and meets me at the side of the truck.

Her lips are pursed, and her brow is furrowed. She looks . . . tired and worried. She settles her palm against my cheek. “I feel like I’m missing a lot of pieces of this story. I’m worried about you for a lot of reasons.”

“I’ve got it handled, Mom.”

She stares at me. “I’m concerned that you’re giving me lip service to shut me up, and that I’ve been missing a lot of signs.” She steps in and wraps her arms around my waist. “I love you. Please be safe. And use condoms.”

I laugh.

She leans back and gives me a look. “I’m serious. I can handle a lot of things, but you getting your professor pregnant before you graduate isn’t one of them.”

“We’re safe, Mom. Don’t worry.”

“It’s my job to worry. Especially about you.”

I help her into the passenger seat and stand in the driveway, waving as they back out. I wait until their taillights disappear down the street before I pull my phone out and send Clover a message. My gut tells me not to go to her until I get the all clear. I don’t want to make an already-shitty situation worse.





Thirty-Two





The Crossroads





Clover





My heart rate calms slightly once I’m out of the athletic facility’s parking lot, though I don’t feel great about leaving Maverick behind—and with his family, no less. I’m on edge as I turn onto Hackett Street, looking for Gabriel’s black BMW. He’d been quiet all semester, ever since the holidays—too quiet. Going through our lawyers, playing by the rules I set . . . That isn’t like him. He’s always liked setting the parameters of our relationship.

The street is empty of cars, though. I’m nervous as I pull in, terrified that Gabriel is going to be waiting for me. But there’s no one lurking in the shadows, at least not that I can see.

As soon as I walk in the door, I call Sophia, and she comes down right away. I fill her in on what happened after the hockey game and how it seems Gabriel has been watching me somehow, even if he hasn’t come around.

“This is not good,” I conclude, wringing my hands. “I have no idea how many people witnessed that. What the hell was Gabriel thinking?” I clasp my hands, resisting the urge to bite my nails.

Sophia shakes her head. “I don’t know, but now might be a good time to consider that order of protection. Gabriel was quiet for a while, but he’s really been escalating since you filed for divorce.”

I think back to the beginning of the end of our marriage, when his control started to slip, and his behavior became erratic. “I thought him showing up at my parents’ over the holidays was bad, but this is something else. What if he reports me to the school? What will I do?”

“Take a breath, Clover.” She reaches over and squeezes my hand. “You were very careful. You followed all the rules, and based on the official protocol, you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Logically yes, but you and I both know that my colleagues—our colleagues—won’t see it that way. The double standard in this profession is ridiculous. No one even bats an eyelash when one of the men professors ends up marrying the PhD candidate he mentored. This won’t be viewed the same way. I might not want to be a professor in the long-term, but it could still have a very negative impact on my future career.”

“You’re assuming the worst is going to happen. Do you really think Gabriel would report you to the school? And wouldn’t he need tangible proof?”

“It was stupid to go to Maverick’s game. What the hell was I thinking?”

“He asked you to come support him, so you did. Lots of faculty attend school sporting events. I doubt you were the only one there tonight.”

“That might be true, but how many of those faculty members are sleeping with one of the players?” I run a hand down my face. “That was such a bad call, Sophia. I should’ve known better.”

She sighs. “You can’t go backwards, though, so we need to make a plan for how you’re going to deal with this. Regular classes are almost finished, and then we’re into exams. What’s the worst that can happen? I’m asking sincerely—in your mind, what’s the worst-case scenario? What are you most afraid of?”

I stop and consider that. “It’s so complicated.”