Beyond the Shadow of Night(45)

The only spark of hope for Asher was how well Rina was coping. One way or another, she was bringing in as much food as the rest of the family combined. Whenever she did this she said nothing, just hurriedly put it away in the cupboard. But Asher noticed.

And so did Papa.

One dark evening late in the year, they all sat down to a meal of potato soup and dumplings. A lot of dumplings.

“Why are there so many dumplings?” Papa said to Mama.

“Are you complaining?” she replied.

“No, but . . .”

Asher noticed that Rina was staring straight ahead, and Keren was giving her a suspicious look.

“I just wondered why,” Papa continued.

“Because I had lots of flour,” Mama said.

Papa thought for a moment, then nodded to himself. He lifted his spoon and held it above the nebulous steaming liquid, lowering it slowly. As soon as it touched the soup he dropped it and let out a frustrated grunt. He stared at Rina, then at Oskar and Sala, as though daring each one of them to speak.

“I can’t take this anymore,” he said to nobody in particular. “It’s Rina, isn’t it?”

There was silence.

“She got the flour, didn’t she?” he added when it became clear his question was not going to be answered. He turned to his wife. “Golda, where did you get the extra flour?”

“I found it.”

“Found it?”

“In the cupboard.”

“But . . .” He turned to Rina. “Look at me, Rina.”

But she could do no more than glance at him.

“Rina?” Papa said again.

Now her look was direct. “You prefer to starve, is that it?”

“No, but . . .”

The two were like a pair of stags locking horns.

“Papa, don’t ask, because I won’t tell you.”

His voice softened, almost cracking. “But I worry for you. Is that so wrong?” He turned to Mama. “Do you know what she’s doing to get this food?”

“Nobody knows,” Rina said. “And it has to stay that way. But please just believe me, Papa, it’s not what you think.”

“I’m not sure what I think,” he mumbled. He shrugged and turned to Oskar. “Oskar, if it was your daughter, what would you think?”

Oskar blinked a few times and looked toward Sala for encouragement. She nodded at him. “We’re just grateful for any extra food we can get,” he said. “We need it . . . I mean, Sala needs it more than ever.”

Papa glanced at Sala. “Really? Why?”

Oskar put an arm around his wife. “She’s . . . expecting a baby.”

Everyone stopped eating and stared at Sala.

“Oh,” Papa said. His jaw lowered as if to say more, but he froze for a couple of seconds as his stare met with that of Oskar, and he lifted his spoon to his mouth.

A long silence followed, nobody else even daring to eat for fear of making a sound.

Then Papa sighed. “And, uh . . .” He glanced at Sala, then Oskar. “. . . have you considered where the extra food is going to come from?”

“Hirsch!” his wife said. “Don’t be so rude.”

“But it’s true. I just wondered whether they thought about—”

“Mr. Kogan,” Oskar interrupted, “I appreciate your concern, but what else can we do?”

His wife leaned forward. “And the war might be over by the time my child is born.”

Papa gave a harrumph. “You really think so? I think you’re deluded.”

“Stop this,” Rina said, slamming her hand on the table, which made her papa visibly back away. “Stop it now. Don’t you all see you’re letting them win if you argue? Let’s try our best to live normal lives. All of you, think what you would really want to do in an ideal world. If you can do it, do it. Don’t give in.”

“That’s all well and good,” Papa replied. “They’re worthy words, but we’re only just getting enough food as it is.”

“It will be okay,” Rina replied.

“But how?”

“We’ll manage. Don’t worry, and don’t ask. Just eat.”

“What’s this? My own daughter ordering me about?”

“Telling you not to worry isn’t an order, Papa.”

Papa shook his head, bemused, but started eating, and they all followed. There was no more conversation until well after the spoons and empty bowls had been taken away, but Asher thought about Rina that night. Like everyone else, he didn’t know exactly what she was doing to get the extra food, but he knew she was brave.

That they survived the year was mainly due to her efforts, whatever they were.





Chapter 15

Parking lot, Allegheny County Jail, Pittsburgh, August 2001

Diane pretty much threw herself into the passenger seat and slammed the car door shut. “Let’s go.”

Brad had driven them three blocks before she said another word. “Damn bureaucrats,” she muttered.

He waited for an explanation that didn’t come before taking a guess with, “So, it’s a no-go, then?”

Another two blocks went by, including a thirty-second wait at the lights.