Between Hello and Goodbye(63)

Silas stared a moment, then his head bowed. “Shit. I’m sorry for that. That doesn’t mean much after the fact—”

“It’s okay. From what Faith says, it happened before your watch. I didn’t tell you to make you feel like shit, I told you because you’re important to Faith and maybe this is my way of saying I appreciate it. Because she’s important to me too. I’d rather there not be any bullshit between us.”

Silas nodded, arms crossed and leaning against the counter. “You’re awfully generous, man. For what it’s worth, I sampled the company product myself. That’s what the NA comment from Max was about. So I know what that addiction feels like, and sure, it might not have been on my watch, but I’m really fucking sorry about your mom all the same.”

I nodded. “Thanks. Strange, though. I feel like this isn’t the first time we’ve met. I know that’s nuts but…”

“No, I get it,” Silas said with a wry smile. “That’s a strange side-effect of addiction. Closes distances. Like we’re members of a secret club and we all know the password.”

“Pretty much sums it up.”

A short silence fell in which any weirdness evaporated, and we relaxed into what I thought might be the start of a friendship.

“How long are you in town for?” he asked.

“Couple more days.”

“And then what happens?”

I thought my hackles would go up at his pointed question, but he was being upfront too. No bullshit.

“I don’t know. I don’t know what the fuck’s supposed to happen next.”

“I don’t want to get all up in your business—”

“Yes, you do because Faith is your business,” I said. “I’d be a dumbass to get in the way of that and wouldn’t want to, anyway.”

“I just don’t want her to get hurt. You’re the first guy she’s ever wanted me to meet. The first guy she’s ever mentioned by name.”

“She’s the first woman I’ve stepped onto the mainland for in years,” I said. “The only one I’d do it for.”

Silas nodded. “I know she really cares about you. Probably more than she’s willing to admit. But…I hate to point out the obvious; you haven’t been together all that long.”

He was right. Faith and I were new, but how I felt about her seemed like it was set deep down in me. As if it’d been there forever and had just been waiting for her.

“It’s hard to remember that sometimes.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” Silas said. “She seems really happy. But you’re there and she’s here and that’s fucking rough. I get it. But maybe you don’t need to figure it all out in these few days. Maybe let things happen the way they’re supposed to happen.”

That was the opposite of how I operated. Being in control and staying that way had been my life’s goal. The second you let your guard down…

Silas broke me out of my thoughts with a hand on my shoulder. “You’re a good guy, Asher. I can see that.”

I smirked. “And if I hurt Faith, you’ll kick my ass.”

“Correct,” Silas said with a grin. “But that’s not what I was going to say. I was going to say, because you’re a good guy, I’m not worried. Things will work out.” His grin widened and his eyes softened. “If you don’t believe me, go talk to Max. He’s positivity personified.”

We clasped hands, this time without the death grip of suspicion on his part and rejoined the others. The conversation flowed even easier now, and Max and Silas didn’t leave until close to midnight.

When they’d gone, Faith and I cleaned up, then curled up in her bed.

“I noticed you and Silas had a long chat in the kitchen,” she said, her head tucked under my chin. “Everything okay? Seems like you two hit it off.”

“We got our shit sorted.”

She relaxed against me. “I hope he didn’t give you a hard time.”

“Not much. He wanted to run a background check, criminal record…”

She laughed. “He’s protective. It’s sweet.”

I pulled her closer. “I’m glad you have him.”

Someone to take care of her when I can’t.

Faith could take care of herself, but that didn’t stop me from wanting to protect her. Keep other people’s negative bullshit off of her and let her be who she wanted to be. Because I knew it could be something special if given half a chance.

But not in Hawaii.

The island had put her in crutches, and her time there was spent in pain, sweaty and struggling. Here, she was effortless—elegant and sexy in designer dresses and heels. Cabs screeched to a halt for her, and men broke their arms hurrying to open doors. She was alive and vibrant in a completely different way than she was in Kauai. This city was her natural habitat, and I snuffed out whatever unspoken hope may have been lurking in my heart.

It wasn’t fair to her to do anything else.



“Here we are again,” Faith said two days later at the Departures terminal at Sea-Tac. “We’re stuck, aren’t we? Trapped somewhere between hello and goodbye.”

I nodded, my arms around her waist.

She gazed up at me searchingly. “What do we do?”