Best Kept Secrets(134)

"Gaither was barely conscious enough to recite his vows.

Reede and I supported him between us through the ceremony,

then dumped him back at the gate of Fort Bliss."

"One thing puzzles me. Why did Reede insist on Celina

getting married?"

"He kept saying he wouldn't let her baby be born a bastard."

Alex looked at him intently from behind her shaded glasses.

"Then, why didn't he marry her himself?"

"He asked her."

"So, what was the problem?"

"Me. I asked her, too." Seeing her confusion, he blew

out his breath. "This all happened the morning following

the, uh--"

"I understand. Go on."

"Celina was still real shaken up and said she couldn't think

clearly. She begged us to stop badgering her. But Reede said

she had to get married in a hurry, or everybody would find

out what had happened."

"Everybody found out anyway," she said.

"He wanted to protect her from the gossip as long as

possible."

"I must be dense, but I still can't figure it. Celina has two

men who love her begging her to get married. Why didn't

she?"



"She refused to choose between us." A furrow of concentration

formed between his brows. "You know, Alex,

that's the first smart, adult decision Celina ever made. We

were seniors in high school. God knows Reede didn't have

any money. I did, but my folks would have gone ape shit if

I'd've gotten married before I even graduated, especially with

Celina carrying another man's baby.

"She had another reason, though, more important than

finances or parental approval. She knew that if she chose one

of us over the other, it would alter the friendship forever.

There would be an odd man out. When it came right down

to it, she wouldn't break up the triangle. Funny, isn't it? That

happened anyway."

"What do you mean?"

"It was never quite the same between the three of us after

we got back from El Paso. We were on guard all the time,

where before, we were always nakedly honest with each

other."

His voice turned sad. "Reede didn't see as much of her

as I did while she was pregnant, and that wasn't very often.

We were busy with school and she stayed close to home.

Oh, we went through the motions of still being best buddies,

but when we were together, we tried too hard to pretend that

everything was normal.

"That night she tried to abort you stood between us like

a solid wall. None of us could ever go up, over, around, or

through it. It was there. Conversations became an effort.

Laughter was forced."

"But, you didn't desert her."

"No. The day you were born, Reede and I rushed to the hospital. Besides your grandmother, we were the first people

you were introduced to."

"I'm glad of that," she said thickly.

"So am I."

"If I'd been Celina, I would have snagged one of you

when I had the chance."

His grin slowly faded. "Reede stopped asking."



"Why?"

Junior signaled for the waitress to refill his coffee cup.

Then, cradling it between his hands, he stared into its dark

depths. "He never forgave her."

"For Al Gaither?"

"For you."

Stricken, Alex raised her hand to cover her mouth. The

guilt she had borne all her life pressed in on her like a vise.

Junior, sensing her anxiety, rushed to say, "It wasn't because

she'd conceived you. He couldn't forgive that abortion

business."

"I don't understand."

"See, Alex, Reede's a survivor. Hell, if anybody was ever

destined to turn out rotten, it was Reede. He didn't have a

snowball's chance in hell of making anything out of himself.

Social workers, if Purcell had had any, would have pointed

at him and said, 'There goes a wasted life in the making.

He'll go bad. Watch and see.' But no, not Reede. He thrives

on adversity. He's a scrapper. He's strong. He gets knocked

down and comes up fighting.

"Now me," he said with a scoffing laugh, "I can overlook

other people's weaknesses because I've got so many of my

own. I could understand the panic and fear Celina must have

felt. She took desperate measures because she was afraid to

stick it out.

' 'Reede can't understand taking the path of least resistance.

He couldn't tolerate that weakness in her. He expects so

goddamn much out of himself, he imposes the same standards

on everybody else. Those standards are virtually impossible

to live up to. That's why he's constantly disappointed in

people. He sets himself up to be."

"He's a cynic."