Before I Let Go (Skyland #1)(62)

“There is no doubt in my mind over what I will choose.” Evren's magic snaked along my palm. “So you ought to clear the doubt from yours and prepare yourself for war if that's what it takes. I will go to war for my kingdom, and I will go to war for my mate.”

My chest tightened as I took in his words, as I took in the promise he had just delivered, but it was the next words that made me feel like I couldn't breathe.

“As will I.” Thalia's voice was sure and left no room for argument. “I will choose Adara, and I will go to war for her if that's what it takes.”

“As will I.” Sorin nodded in my direction, and emotion welled up inside of me.

“Without question.” Jorah held the queen’s gaze, and it hit me at that moment how much the three of them had come to mean to me. They were Evren’s friends, his advisors, and comrades, but they had also become mine.

“We should hide her.” Queen Veda looked to Evren. “She would be so much safer if we did so.”

“No.” Evren's magic surged, and I could feel it along with my own. “Gavril already knows that she's with me. There is no use in hiding her now.”

“But she would be safer.” She looked to Sorin then back to my mate. “We all know that she is the key to the prophecy and keeping her hidden would be the best plan for keeping her out of Gavril’s hands.”

“I won't hide.” I pressed my boots firmly against the floor as I looked around the table. “The prophecy has made it clear that I will be used by one kingdom or another, but I won't be used by hiding. If I'm to help your kingdom then I am to become a weapon.”

Queen Veda shook her head, and I knew that she didn't agree but it wasn't her decision to make. Evren said that I was to stay at his side, and for me, that meant even when his brother arrived.

“Sorin and Jorah, make sure that our men are ready.” Evren issued the command without looking back at his mother. “We should be prepared for any kind of trick that Gavril could throw our way.”

Sorin and Jorah stood, both bowing their heads slightly in Evren’s direction before leaving the table.

“Thalia, I’d like for you to work with Adara in my room. Make sure she's ready to control all of her magic if the need arises.” He didn’t look at me as he gave her his command.

“Of course.” Thalia stood and looked to me, but I wasn't ready to leave his side.

“But…” I tugged on Evren's hand, and he lifted them and pressed my knuckles against his mouth once more.

“I will meet you shortly.” His gaze never fell from mine. “Stay with Thalia.”

I stood slowly, even though it was the last thing I wanted to do, and my magic reached out for Evren as if it was begging me not to leave. I leaned down and grasped his face in my hands, and I pressed my lips to his before I could think better of it. I kissed him hard and desperately. I didn't care that there were still so many in the room watching us. I didn't care that his mother sat next to him while I desperately clung to my mate.

He pressed his forehead to mine as we broke the kiss, and his breath rushed out against my lips. “You are mine,” he whispered only loud enough for me to hear, but the possession snaked through every inch of me.

“I am yours.” I stood before I could no longer find the will to do so and looked toward Thalia.

She nodded to me once before I followed her from the throne room with the sound of the queen's murmured voice echoing behind us. We pushed through the doors and stepped into the hall, and I took a deep breath that didn't seem to fill my lungs.

“This way.” Thalia led me down the hall but not in the direction of mine or Evren’s rooms. She took me toward the side of the castle I had never been, and I followed behind her dutifully.

“Where are we going?” I struggled to keep up with her long strides. “I thought Evren wanted us to go back to his room.”

Thalia's gaze bounced down the hallway before looking back at me. “Evren is careful with his words, but you and I are going to the library.”

“The library? I thought he wanted me to train.” I feared that I would have to use my magic when Gavril became a direct threat, and I wasn’t sure I was ready.

“He wants us to research the prophecy to find out whatever we can.” She wrapped her arm in mine and pulled me closer to her. “He wants to have every advantage possible when Gavril arrives at our door.”

“And that advantage lies in the library?”

“Evren knows that power lies in knowledge. Even if we aren’t able to find the answer we seek, we may find the answer we don’t know we need.”

We turned right and went down another long hallway until we reached an ornate set of double doors. Thalia pushed inside and grabbed a small lantern from the table. The library was dark and smelled of old parchment and wood.

It was much bigger than the library I had visited in the fae palace, and I ran my fingers along the spines of the books as we passed.

Thalia led us down the aisles of books, and I followed her step for step as I had no idea where I was going.

“Here.” She set the lantern on a small table that faced an old wooden bookshelf filled to the brim with leather-bound books. “This is where we’ll start.”

I pulled a book from the shelf, dark green leather supple against my fingers, and I sat down at the table and began flipping through it.