Beat of the Heart (Runaway Train, #2)(66)

“Manny, you’re slacking, dude.”

A grin stretched across his chalky face. “It ain’t me, man. You’re the one dragging on the triplets.”

“Ha! So you caught that?”

With a smirk that outrivaled mine, he replied, “You ain’t got nothing on me, Ese.”

I laughed. Visiting sick kids and teenagers in hospitals was one of the hardest and most rewarding parts of my job. I mean, it’s a hell of a mind-tripping, ego-bend when you’re the one to put a smile on the face of a kid who was bald from just going through a round of chemo. Or out of all the famous people in the world, they’d wanna hang out with you.

Today, however, was an unexpected visit to Scottish Rite. I’d been lounging on the couch with a beer in my hand, waiting to drink myself into a mindless stupor, when Abby had called me. I knew the moment I picked up the phone that she wanted a favor from me by the sugary-sweet tone of her voice. After what had happened at the farm with Mia, I’d been on her shit-list for a long time. Especially when I continued to be in her words, ‘a stubborn *’, for not reaching out to Mia.

What I had failed to tell her, or any of the guys for that matter, was that I had tried for days to call and text Mia, but she had never returned any of them. Finally the prideful side of me had said screw Mia and her stupid stubbornness. Unfortunately, my sappy-ass heart hadn’t quite gotten the message.

Even though I sounded like a total * admitting it, the past four months had been the most miserable ones in my life. I played it off around the guys, acted like things were fine, and that I was the happiest motherf*cker in the world. Whether they were truly buying it, I don’t know. I mean, they had to notice I wasn’t hooking up with any chicks. A few weeks after Mia left me, I took a blonde bombshell back to the bus with me. Even with all her assets and hard work, I couldn’t get it up. All I could see was Mia in my mind. I ended up getting the chick off as fast as I could to get her the hell away from me. After that nightmare, I hadn’t attempted to try again.

There was a part of me that felt like I needed some kind of penance for what I’d done. I mean, if it hadn’t been for my past with Kylie and the other chicks, maybe Mia wouldn’t have felt she couldn’t be with me. Not to mention the ugly truth that I’d used a lot of women over the years. That fact was one of the reasons why I’d told Abby yes. Plus, I wanted back on her good side, so I’d agreed to come along with her and her brothers as they made a charity stop at Scottish Rite, which wasn’t too far from my house.

I had a feeling there was more she wasn’t telling me about why she was recruiting me, rather than Jake, but when the limo came by to pick me up, I didn’t press her for any details. I figured if she wanted to talk about it, she would. I just hoped she didn’t mention Mia. That was a subject I refused to talk about with anyone other than Jose Cuervo.

“Hey man, is your head in your ass or something?” Manny demanded.

“Huh?”

“You totally just screwed up. Like epically.”

“Sorry.” Fuck, I felt like a major * letting my mind wander to Mia when I should have been focusing on Manny.

“Yeah, well my problem might be that my head is in my ass, but I think yours lies in your sticks,” I said.

“Ain’t nothing wrong with these bad boys besides being a little banged up,” he countered.

I held out mine to him. “These are for you.”

His eyes widened. “Seriously?”

“Yep. But you gotta promise me you’ll practice.”

His head bobbed furiously. “I swear I will.”

I pointed a finger at him. “You better.” I took a card out of my pocket and gave it to him. “You’ve got my number now, so you better call me and let me know how it’s going.”

“Dude, I will. Thank you. That’s awesome.”

“Let’s say the next time we jam, we do it at your house and not this shitty place?”

He laughed. “I’m down for that.”

A nurse appeared before me, signaling it was time to go. “All right, Ese. I gotta hit the road. You take care of yourself, okay?”

“I will.”

We gave each other the traditional guy hug, or pat on the back, before I went to meet the nurse in the doorway. I waved goodbye one last time to Manny.

“Ms. Renard and her brothers are in 305,” the nurse informed me.

“Thank you,” I replied.

Peering at the wall, I started counting down the numbers to 305. But then I heard Abby’s sweet voice floating back to me, and I knew exactly where to find her. She had just finished singing when I reached the doorway. I wasn’t too surprised to find her in the bed, snuggling with two bald, little girls who were absolutely enraptured by her and her singing. She kissed both their cheeks goodbye before rising out of the bed. As she powerwalked by me, I could see the tears pooling in her eyes. While her brothers started making their goodbyes to the girls, I left to go to Abby.

She hadn’t gotten far down the hall. “Mi amor,” I said softly, as I caught up to her.

“I’m okay,” came her weak reply.

Side-stepping in front of her, I drew her into my arms. “Hey, it’s okay to cry. This shit is hard.”

Fisting the front of my shirt in her hands, she sobbed into my chest. Although I knew the little girls had gotten to her, I could tell that this was about more than just them. It most likely had to do with Susan, Jake’s mom, and the grief that both she, and Jake, were still experiencing.