Ask Me Why(39)

I pinch the bridge of my nose. “We kept this going for almost two years, until Veronica got pregnant. The day she found out was the true beginning of an agonizing end. The arguing started almost immediately. The last thing I wanted was a woman connected to me for the rest of my life. But that baby was mine, and I was prepared to raise him. Veronica felt the complete opposite. She planned to have an abortion the moment a doctor approved the procedure. Don’t get me wrong. I’m supportive of the woman’s right to choose. Unless, of course, that decision involved killing my child.”

An erratic stampede thunders in my ears. There’s not a reality for me where Ollie doesn’t exist. It’s simply not a feasible thought. I clench my eyes shut and picture his smiling face. He’s the only good I have.

Braelyn’s hands are curled into trembling fists. She looks ready to spit bullets. Not sure if her expression is aimed at me or Veronica. I’m guessing the latter. Either way, she gives me the fire power to continue traveling along this road paved in cruel memories.

“By some miracle, I convinced Veronica not to terminate the pregnancy. It was a bloody battle. She made me miserable for nine months. Carrying him full term was a death sentence to her. As punishment, she set out to humiliate me whenever physically possible. She could write the book on manipulation. Veronica held everything over my head. Nothing was off-limits. She’d come to my office. Hound me at home. Come to the bar when I was out with friends. Wake me up at three o’clock in the morning with a list of demands. If I didn’t give, she’d threaten to call the clinic. That bitch had their number on speed-dial.”

A tremor snakes up my limbs, making me shiver. “Veronica used our baby as a weapon against me. Once she was further along and showing, things went from bad to unbearable. She went legit psycho. I honestly don’t understand how she ever appealed to me. Whenever we were in public together, she’d fight with me on purpose. The ugly kind, like a wreck you can’t look away from. I was the worthless bastard who knocked her up. She let anyone within listening range hear about it. I’m thankful Veronica was stuck in town for med school. Even though I was in hell with her around, the alternative would have been worse. She would’ve left just so I’d have to chase her. Her tolerance for me shrank to nothing by the time Ollie was born.”

I swallow the bile rising in my throat. “He was wailing with all his might, but Veronica wouldn’t even look at him. She left the hospital mere hours after giving birth. The doctors strongly advised against it, but there was no reasoning with her. She took off without a word, and I let her go. When the door slammed behind her, it was disturbingly clear that Veronica would only be known as an egg donor.”

The restless air shifts and settles around me. A familiar numbness seeps into my pores, the haze of indifference expanding. “I had Ollie, and that’s all I cared about. For his sake, I try to remain civil whenever he brings her up. He wants to know about her and why she left. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever struggled with. I could give a rip how she treated me. But Ollie deserves better.” My exhale is rough, purging the remaining debris left inside of me.

“So, there you have it.” I dust off my palms. “Veronica shoved my empathy and compassion through a meat grinder. That shit is a pulverized mass, hideous and beyond saving. Not that there was much to begin with. Living happily ever after is a myth. That notion belongs in fairy tales and bedtime stories. Reality is a twisted, mangled version. The sanctity of marriage is a farce. My parents were stellar models for that sham. If the concept wasn’t already lost on me, Veronica would have finished the task. That’s what makes me a successful divorce lawyer.”

Braelyn’s throat bobs with a gulp. “Well, now I’m the speechless one.”

“We’re fucked up, huh?”

She nods. “Sadly, yes. I’m not sure who’s worse off.”

She is, of course. But I don’t dare voice that. “It’s not a competition.”

“No shit?” Her eyelashes flutter shut, hiding that stunning gaze. But those mossy pools are fixated on me again a moment later. “Is Veronica gone for good?”

I sneer at the sound of that woman’s name spilling from Braelyn’s lips. “She’s in California for her residency. I’d prefer Australia or Africa, but a few thousand miles between us is good enough for now.”

“Do you think she’ll try to gain custody of Ollie?” The wobble in her voice is a punch to my solar plexus.

Thick tar gurgles in my gut, staining everything with a black hue. “She’d be batshit to try taking me on. I’m a damn good attorney. My case against her would be bulletproof. Veronica wouldn’t survive the battle I’d rain down on her. All she cares about is her career. I’m sure she’ll make the best surgeon. Ripping out hearts with her bare hands is a specialty.”

“I don’t get that. What kind of life will she have?”

I’m quiet for a moment. Past and present collide with the future in my mind. “An isolated one. That type of solitary existence is what I always imagined for myself. Ollie changed that. He’s fulfilling dreams I never allowed myself to have.”

Her sigh is a pleasant tune. “See? That’s what I mean. He’s everything to you. Why wouldn’t Veronica want to meet Ollie?”

Pondering her question isn’t necessary. My response is split-second. “She’s callous and senseless. I sent her pictures from his first birthday, trying to be nice for Ollie’s sake. Maybe she’d want some semblance of a relationship with her child, right? Any sane mother would. Well, the sealed envelope was returned with a big note clearly stating not to contact her again.”