Always(Time for Love Book 4)(33)
“Oh, right,” he said, instinctively focusing his attention on Magda’s eyes.
“I’ll leave you two to talk,” Brenna said, sliding a hand on his arm. “I’m getting a drink. Do you want something, Ash?”
“I’ll be fine for now, Bren. Thanks,” he said. He couldn’t help but watch her walk away. What he wouldn’t give to take her in his arms again—as his girlfriend. He shook his head, annoyed at himself for his continued foolishness.
He drew his attention back to Magda, who was watching him with interest.
“You know, Ash,” Magda said as she arranged herself on her chair, “I’ve been walking around with less-than-perfect eyesight for a while now. I haven’t noticed that it’s been deteriorating gradually because I’m still able to see as long as I wear my glasses. Isn’t it funny how I got used to things, not realising there’s something significantly wrong with my vision?”
Ash chuckled. “Yes, most people tend to adjust. Only when it becomes bad enough do they do something about it. It’s always better to diagnose and treat any health issues early. The ideal, of course, is to take measures to prevent problems developing altogether.”
“Yes,” Magda mused. “Like my eyesight. Right now I think I’m seeing clearly enough to get by. But I’m sure that after you fix it, I’ll be surprised at the difference a clearer vision makes. Have you had your eyes checked lately, Ash?” she added.
“Yes. I see my colleague regularly for tests.”
“That’s good. Make sure you’re seeing things as clearly as you could. Your vision could be cloudy and you might not know it. Lots of us make poor decisions because of poor vision. It’s a shame, really.”
Ash stared at Magda. Was she trying to tell him something?
Another lady with an apron on came by with a tray of drinks. He took a glass of wine and glanced around. His eyes landed on Brenna, chatting with Gemma. She was comfortable around him today. That was good. It seemed their friendship was back on track.
His heart lurched at the thought. He had made the right decision, hadn’t he?
CHAPTER TWELVE
“He hugged me very tightly, Gem. I know he’s gone back into hiding, but he couldn’t fool me. His heart was beating so loudly I swear I heard it,” Brenna said with conviction.
Gemma sighed. “Yes, he’s gone back to his old coping techniques—swallowing his hurt and pretending everything’s okay.”
“But that can’t be good for him!” Brenna exclaimed.
“And it’s not good for you either,” Gemma said pointedly.
Brenna slumped back in her seat. “He broke up with me so I wouldn’t feel so torn. He didn’t want me to feel guilty and stressed from worrying about his reactions when I’m with Darren. But this is worse! This hurts so bad!”
“Then tell him that.”
“But what about him, Gem?” she asked in a softer voice. “He said it would be easier for him to handle his jealousy if we’re not in a relationship. If I force us to get back together, wouldn’t I also be forcing him to suffer more? And I can totally see why his jealousy is quite irrational when it comes to Darren. He watched me with Darren for years. Multiple times he’s seen us kiss and be lovey-dovey. He must have been wounded enough from that, so I can understand why he couldn’t bear to see me and Darren together now.” She sighed in frustration. “I love him so much but I don’t know what to do!”
Gemma slammed her drink on the table. “This is ridiculous. You guys love each other yet you’re not together. You’re both protecting each other from further hurt and you’re both suffering from it. It’s not fair!”
“Hey, what’s going on?” Rebecca asked as she, Sarah and Amanda joined them.
Gemma repeated her mini-tirade against the unfairness of the situation Brenna and Ash found themselves in.
“You know, Bren,” Amanda said. “If only Ash could get over his jealousy, this wouldn’t be a problem. If only he could trust that you won’t fall in love with Darren again, then he wouldn’t get too jealous. And then you wouldn’t feel like you’re hurting him whenever you and Darren have to pretend in front of Patty.”
Brenna stared at Amanda, a lightbulb going on in her head. “Amanda, thank you,” she said with awe.
Amanda exhaled loudly. “Don’t thank me yet, Bren. I’ll do what I can to help Ash wake up, but his scars are deep.”
“What I mean is I can work on making him trust that I won’t fall for Darren again,” she answered, a smile spreading on her face. “Magda’s right. She told me earlier she believes love can conquer all. What I have to do is show Ash I love him fully and unconditionally, and that I’m his girl whether we’re together or not. That I’ll keep turning up even if he tries to push me away. Then hopefully, he’ll see that he really has nothing to worry about.”
*****
Brenna went back to the buffet table to get more food. To her disappointment, the olives in some of the dishes had run out. She loved olives like some people loved chocolates.
She settled for some Caesar salad and returned to the dining table where everyone was seated. Deliberately passing behind Ash, she peeked at his plate. Just as she’d suspected, he had five olives pushed to the side of his dish. Usually, he’d have given them to her by now, but she guessed he didn’t want to look like he cared too much. Silly man. Wasn’t he supposed to act like they were good friends again?