A Promise of Fire (Kingmaker Chronicles, #1)(102)

“Flynn’s a great warrior, but he’s never had to be a leader. Suddenly being part of a ruling family can be intimidating.” I nudge her arm. “As you know.”

“And you,” she answers, nudging me back.

I feel the blood wash from my face. “What do you mean?”

“Just that you’re practically part of the family, and Griffin will make it official sooner or later.”

My insides freeze solid. “I don’t function well in families. And that’s not his decision to make.”

Jocasta laughs. “You fit in perfectly. We all love you, and Griffin has never been so focused, not even when he was taking over the realm. You’re everything to him. More than any of this.” She sweeps her hand out, indicating not just the castle, but the whole of Sinta, I think.

The ice inside me melts. Suddenly, I’m burning up and terrified, scared I’ll be too weak to resist.

Scratch that—I’m petrified I’ve already given in.

*

As soon as I can cross the courtyard without my head spinning, I try to move back into the barracks. Griffin gave me his room and moved down the hall, but I can’t help thinking he’s planning on moving back in. Soon. With me still in the room. A few buildings between us would definitely help keep me sane.

He catches wind of my packing after dinner and arrives in my room with his eyebrows drawn down, his arms crossed, and only one word to say.

“No?” I repeat, incredulous.

“Do you need me to say it in sign language?”

I roll my eyes. “That won’t be necessary.”

“Obviously it is.” He puts his hands on my hips, backs me against the wall, and then kisses me until I can’t breathe. Or think. Or stand up, apparently, because I stumble when he lets go.

He steadies me, a satisfied smile curving his amazing lips.

“Don’t look so smug,” I say, panting. “I fall down all the time these days.”

“Not when you’re standing still.” He drags his tunic over his head.

I stare, and he flexes.

“Show-off,” I mutter.

He grins and drops the tunic over my head. “So you won’t scream bloody murder,” he says, backing out of the room.

His shirt falls to my knees. I punch my arms through the sleeves, make a rude hand gesture, and then slam the bedroom door.

Missing him already, I crawl into Griffin’s big bed, curled up in Griffin’s big shirt, and go to sleep wondering if it really matters what I do when no one can see.

*

With my continued guidance, the realm dinner preparations are well in hand and the royal family is irreproachable in their court etiquette and memorization of facts. As soon as I’m able, I also go back to supervising the rebuilding of the north wall. I get Flynn and Kato to help and Jocasta and Kaia to bring out picnics.

After we got back from Ios, I suggested employing some of the older children as servants in the castle. We need extra hands for the realm dinner, and in general. The castle servants from before mostly ran off during the takeover, and used to a simpler life, no one here felt the need to replace them until now. The children who were old enough jumped at the chance to make money for their families, and the Sintan royals now have adoring, loyal servants. A house full of children who love you eventually turns into a house full of adults who would defend you to the death. That’s something Andromeda would never understand.

Jocasta and Kaia took them all, marching them back to the castle for a good scrubbing and their new uniforms. We replaced our missing wall builders the next day, starting again with food and fun. The new children still eat like they’re starving even though their bones are no longer visible, and their faces don’t look sunken or hollow. They work fast and well, always leaving us time to organize games after lunch so they won’t have to work during the hottest part of the day.

Flynn doesn’t interact with Jocasta beyond common courtesies, and I learn that he’s known her since before she could walk, which isn’t promising for what Jocasta has in mind. It’s like she said, no one comes near her, and he and Kato seem more interested in impressing the children than impressing the princesses. They haul the heaviest rocks, tease the boys, show them fighting moves, and encourage them to join the army when they’re older. They’re strong, handsome, and fun, and the boys worship them.

If Jocasta almost never looks at Flynn, and Kaia looks too much at Kato, the men don’t seem to notice. What I notice is that I end up the hub of this great big wheel, and without me, all the spokes would go flying. It’s as bad inside the castle as it is out. If Griffin isn’t around, everyone defers to me. Me! How in the Underworld did that happen? Now, I have to organize, direct, plan, and practically throw certain people together. Gods! I hate responsibility.

Two days before the realm dinner, the children march ahead of us on the way back to the main gate, singing a bawdy song Kato really shouldn’t have taught them. Kaia is turning kalaberry red, and Jocasta is pretending not to hear.

I casually slide my foot to the side and trip her.

Jocasta lets out an oath I’m surprised she even knows and then glares up at me from the ground, her cheeks flushed pink and a dark curl bouncing over one eye. Perfect.

“Oh, no! You tripped on a root.” I crouch down and poke her leg. “You twisted your ankle.”