A Kingdom of Venom and Vows (Stars and Shadows #3)(52)

“He did that to her?” Her voice was weak and pleading, and I hated that I couldn’t take this away.

I moved closer to her, forcing every inch of space out from between us, and her body trembled against me.

“This was him.”

Her eyes skated over every inch of her mother, and I knew the moment she saw the note Gavril had left for her. Because there was no mistaking his intentions. He did this to hurt her, but he also did it to haunt her. To make her face the things she had done to his mother and pay for those sins.

But she had already paid more than enough. And I was tired of watching her sacrifice.

If I wasn’t already ready to kill my brother, then the look on my Adara’s face now would have sealed his fate. I didn’t care what kind of magic he possessed. I would kill him and my father.

“Oh my gods.” Adara stumbled backward, but I was already there. Already holding her and trying to give her the only support I had to offer.

She turned into me, digging her fingers into my chest, and she let out a harsh, ragged breath against my neck. I wrapped my arms around her, pressing her into my body as tightly as I could get her, and I breathed her in as I stared at the people around us.

“Sorin.” I simply said his name, but he was already nodding.

“I’ve got it.” He met my gaze, and I could see the truth lying there. “Go take care of her.”

I tightened my arms around her and lifted her into me, and she didn’t stop me. She only clung to me harder as I pulled her away from the space, away from the horror, and my gaze met her father’s.

He, too, looked haunted by what he had just seen, but there was so much concern there. Concern for his daughter who he had lost so much time with.

I left him there, along with everyone else, and I moved us until the sounds of their voices drowned out behind us. Adara didn’t say a word as we left them, but I heard the way she tried to stop herself from crying, the way she tried to hold it together.

And it made me feel helpless.

I pushed through our bedroom door and kicked it closed behind me. I wanted to burn the memory of the way her mom looked from my brain, but I knew that she never would. This would be something that would stay with her forever.

And I would never let her carry that burden alone. I would carry it for her if I could.

I climbed into the bed, still holding her against me, and only when I leaned back against the headboard did she allow the first sob to rack through her.

She grasped my shirt as if it was the only thing keeping her in this world, her nails digging into my chest underneath as she buried her face against me.

I ran my fingers over her hair and down her cheek, trying to reassure both of us that she was okay. Tears poured down her face and her breath hitched in her lungs, the oxygen intoxicated by her emotion.

“I’ve got you, princess.” My hands tightened around her, and she buried her face harder into my neck. I didn’t know what else to say, if there was anything I could say that would take even an ounce of this pain away from her.

But I knew that I wouldn’t leave her.

So, I did the only thing I could. I held her and ran my hand slowly up and down her back until her sobs calmed and the tears stopped rolling so fiercely down her cheeks.

She had become so still I thought she had fallen asleep, but her hands tightened against my neck just before the words slipped from her lips.

“I feel…” She hesitated, and I continued to run my hand along her skin, encouraging her. “I feel so guilty.” Her voice was hoarse from her tears, and she stumbled over her words.

My hand stalled against her back, and I pressed my palms into her upper arms until I could pull her away from me far enough that I could see her face. I needed her to see how serious I was when I spoke.

“There is nothing for you to feel guilty for. You didn’t do this.”

“But…” More tears seeped down her face. “But I did kill the queen, and he took my mother’s life for it.”

“The queen deserved her death, Adara. If it hadn’t been by your hand, it would have been by my own. Her blood on your hands should bring no guilt.”

She wiped at the tears on her face as she gently shook her head. “I hadn’t even thought of her.”

“The queen?”

“My mother,” she admitted quietly. “I have barely thought of her once since you arrived in my village to take me. I have hated her.”

I wasn’t surprised by her admission. From what I knew of her mother from her deal with my father and Queen Kaida, she was cruel in the worst of ways. She used Adara, raised her for slaughter for my family, and then she pretended to hold back tears as she so easily gave her away.

She knew what the king and queen had done to Adara’s father, or at least what we all thought, but still, she gave her only daughter to those very people, and she was paid handsomely for it.

I had delivered many of the coins myself.

Her daughter was the Starblessed that was promised, and she lived her life bleeding every bit of those advantages dry.

When I first met Adara, I had that same vision of her in my mind, but I was wrong. She wanted no part in being the Starblessed. If she could have simply ripped those marks from her skin, I had no doubt she would have.

But her mother wouldn’t have traded her blessing for anything.

“And you are not to feel guilty for that either.” I pressed my hand against her chin, lifting her head until her remorseful gaze met mine. “You are still allowed to mourn her, Adara. You can be sad about the death of the woman who didn’t treat you well. She was your mother, whether she was good at it or not. But you don’t owe her anything. Not in life and not in death.”