A Kingdom of Blood and Betrayal (Stars and Shadows #2)(6)

It was just me and the fantasy that my slumber allowed.

I reached to my side, my body craving more warmth than even the sun could provide, and my hand was left wanting. I blinked my eyes open against the brightness that filled the tent and reality came crashing in.

I was still a prisoner to those outside the tent, and I was alone.

Voices were calling orders to one another outside, but I didn’t care about any of them. Evren was gone.

I stayed with him last night when he asked me to, and now, I knew I should have felt relieved that he was gone when I awoke, but I felt foolish.

I threw the small blanket off me and moved back to the side of the tent where my bedroll still laid on the grass. I quickly slipped my boots onto my feet and rolled up my bedding with short, frustrated movements.

I put together Evren’s bedroll as well because I couldn’t stand to look at it any longer. I dropped both by the door of the tent before I took a deep breath and pushed my hair out of my face.

I stepped out of the tent and tried to leave every bit of my insecurities behind me. I was in a camp full of my enemies without my dagger, and I wouldn’t allow them to see that their prince had given me every reason not to trust him, yet I had still given him more of myself than I should have allowed. I was foolish enough to only allow one of them that pleasure, and even though he had already proven what he was capable of, my chest ached with how easily I had given into him.

I moved toward the small fire that still had deep red coals burning at its center, and I lifted my hands out, chasing their warmth.

“How did you sleep?”

I spun my head to the side at the sound of Queen Veda’s voice and watched as she came up beside me. Her dark hair was pulled back at the nape of her neck, and her trousers were coated in dirt and dust from her days of travel. She held out some sort of dried meat in my direction, and I hesitated.

“I’m not going to poison you, Starblessed.” She chuckled softly and held it out further in my direction. I noted the dark circles under her eyes as she raised her chin. “If I did, this would all be for nothing.”

“Don’t call me that.” I took the meat from her hand, but I still didn’t bring it to my mouth.

“Starblessed? That’s what you are, isn’t it?” She was studying me as she spoke, gauging my reaction to her words.

“These marks on my skin aren’t a blessing.” I shook my head and looked back to the fire. “They have done nothing but damn my fate.”

“Your fate can’t simply be damned by the way you were born.” Her gaze roamed over my cheeks before falling to my shoulder. “The mark of the stars didn’t curse you. It was people who did that, Adara. People who don’t give a damn if they hurt you as long as they can control you and weaponize you for their own rule.”

“People like you?” My mark sparked to life against my spine, and I knew Evren was near. I looked over my shoulder, and there he stood near his men and a few horses, and he nodded at something one of them was saying even though he was looking directly at me.

“I don’t expect you to trust me, Adara.”

I pulled my attention back to her. Her hands squeezed into fists even as her shoulders fell.

“I would question your sanity if you did so blindly, but Queen Kaida and I, we aren’t the same.”

My stomach hardened at her words. She was right, I didn’t trust her, and I didn’t think I ever would. She was the queen of the Blood kingdom, the mother of my mate, I stuttered in thought at how easily that word formed in my mind, who betrayed me, and no one becomes queen without a thirst for power.

“I apologize for not taking your word on that.” I crossed my arms. “Queen Kaida would like for me to believe that she isn’t nearly as bad as she truly is as well.”

“That’s probably true.” She smiled, though it didn’t reach her eyes, and gave a half shrug. “But I’ve never known the woman to be anything other than her true, cruel self.” Her gaze dropped to my hand where I was still holding the dried meat, and she nodded toward it. “Eat. We’ll be leaving for Sidra Palace shortly.”

She turned, leaving me with nothing but the meat and my thoughts, and I looked back to where Evren stood. He was still watching me, his gaze hard and unreadable, but it flickered to his mother as she moved away from me.

I shoved the meat into my mouth as he took a step in my direction and quickly turned away from him. I wasn’t ready to face him after last night, after I allowed him to kiss me after everything that had happened. I had kissed him with so much want laced behind my lips, and he left the tent this morning without a single word.

“You ready?”

I could feel the heat of his chest at my back, but I didn’t turn around. I just stared ahead at the dying fire and nodded once. I could feel him studying me from behind, the heat of his gaze stronger than the flames in front of me, and I quickly swallowed the tough meat before wiping my mouth.

“Princess?” Just hearing his voice made my stomach tighten to the point of pain.

“I asked you not to call me that.” My voice was cold and unfeeling, exactly like I wanted it, but the complete opposite of how I felt inside. The urge to make sure he was okay was overwhelming, and I was dying to know if he was plagued with his nightmares often.

“Okay.” I could practically hear the frustration in his voice. “Are you ready, Adara?”