A Kingdom of Blood and Betrayal (Stars and Shadows #2)(5)

“He is.” Evren looked down at my wrist, and I wondered if he could remember the night we left as easily as I could. Did that night haunt his dreams as it did my own? “But that doesn’t mean anything, Adara.” His thumb traced over my scar before he slowly looked back up at me. “He will stop at nothing until he has you back.”

“I won’t go back.”

His grip tightened on my wrist. “I know. I won’t let him take you again.”

“And if that means he tries to kill you to get to me?”

“You are mine, consequences be damned.”

“Yet you would so willingly use me as a pawn in your games?” These were games of kingdoms. A game I had no business being part of.

“Is that what you think I’m doing?” He didn’t speak a single word that lacked conviction. “Do you not think it would be far easier for me to give in to what my father wants or even my mother? Do you honestly think I wanted to fall for the one person I shouldn’t want, the one person who could destroy everything?”

I didn’t say a word in return. I simply stared up at the tent ceiling as I tried not to let his words affect me. I was failing miserably, and I feared he could hear the erratic beat of my heart.

“I have spent my entire life making decisions based on others, princess. If I was thinking of no one other than myself, then I would have stolen you away the first moment I had the chance. I would have stolen you away and never looked back.”

“Your mother?” I was desperate to know how many of his decisions had been affected by her. What would his mother have him do with me if he allowed her the chance?

“My mother, my kingdom, my friends.” He tucked his arm behind his head and rolled to his back. He stared up at the tent ceiling too, and I wondered what thoughts were running through his head that he didn’t say aloud. “The acts of my father, and my brother after him, have determined the fate of my decisions more than anything. It is often that we are ruled by hate far more than we are ever controlled by love.”

Chill bumps ghosted over my skin. He was right. Far too many of my own decisions were fueled by hate. Hate for my mother and the decisions she made. Hate for his family for the life they forced me to live. Hate for the dreams that plagued my mind of my father, whom I didn’t even know.

“But your powers are…” I trailed off, and he turned to look at me.

“I’m strong, Adara.” He lifted his fingers just above his chest and let his magic fall from them. It coiled around his wrist almost as if it were alive and eager to touch him. “But I am not strong enough to defeat them. Not on my own.”

“But you’re strong enough with me?” Fear consumed me, but I didn’t know what I feared the most. The fact that I was going to be used in this war against kingdoms or the fear I wouldn’t be what they had expected of me.

That everything that had happened wouldn’t be worth it.

“It’s not about me being strong enough.” He finally looked over at me, and there was something in his gaze that I couldn’t place. “It’s about what we become together. It’s about the choices we’ll make as mates.”

“And what if that’s not what I want? What if I don’t choose to be everything that the world has deemed me to be?”

“I fear you don’t have a choice in that. Neither of us do.” He didn’t take his gaze off me as he lifted his hand and pressed his fingers to my cheek. “But if I did have a choice, Adara, I would choose you.”

I shook my head as I watched him because I couldn’t allow myself to believe his words. Believing them made me weak, they made me vulnerable to being hurt even more than I already was.

“I would choose you over anything, princess.”

He leaned forward and closed the space between us, and I didn’t stop him. I simply let my eyes fall closed as he pressed his mouth to mine and kissed me with desperation that was far too familiar to my own.

His kiss felt like a brand. It felt like an apology that he would never be able to say with his words.

And I chased the feeling of it. I kissed back just as hard, and I moaned into his mouth when his hand grazed over my neck. I wanted him.

I wanted his body, his passion. I wanted him to make me forget everything but this moment we were in.

I wanted to forget that I was the Starblessed and he was the prince of both blood and magic. We were mates, and I wanted to think of nothing else in that moment.

But he slowed the kiss, and reality crept its way back in. He pulled away from me slightly before pressing another gentle kiss to my mouth.

He searched my face, and there was so much indecision staring back at me in his own.

“We should sleep, princess.” He ran his fingers along my cheeks, and I could see him warring with himself. “Tomorrow will bring much for us to face.”

I clamped my eyes shut as he guided me until my head was laying against his chest.

I felt his next words rumble beneath me. “But we will face them together.”





CHAPTER 3





The warmth of the sun was bleeding through the tent, and I moaned at the delicious way it heated my skin. I could stay in this moment forever with my eyes still closed and the kiss of the morning welcoming me. Nothing could touch me there. Not the truth of what the day was to bring. Not the heartbreak that still lay dormant in my chest.