A Dawn of Onyx (The Sacred Stones, #1)(92)

I squeezed her hand tightly, my brows knitting inward. “What for?”

“When the King found us in Garnet, he told us what you did for Ryder. For all of us. How many you had healed in the Onyx Kingdom outpost. I had no idea where you had gone. If you were still alive. But part of me knew all along you would be just fine on your own. That maybe, it was necessary. I fear I sheltered you too much. I just know how dark a place this world can be.”

My thoughts flashed to Bert, the wolfbeast, Halden’s lies. “I’m grateful. Had I known what was out there, I might never have given myself the chance to be brave.”

My mother shook her head and pulled me into her arms. “I’m so lucky to have you as my daughter. The world is a better place seen through your eyes.”

It felt like home, resting my head against her shoulder, and feeling her soothing hands on my back. “If anything, I get it from you,” I mumbled into her.

“My kind girl. Don’t let anyone take that from you. The shining light you have within.”

I nodded into the crook between her neck and shoulder, the nighttime buzzing of crickets and cicadas like a cocoon for our embrace. With everything that was unfolding—understanding I would likely not see Kane again for months if not years, the brewing conflict with a Fae King—I hadn’t realized how much I just needed my mother. I never wanted to let go.

She squeezed me harder and said, “I think tomorrow I’m going to swim in the bay. What do you think of that?”

A single tear slipped down my cheek onto her dress. “I think that sounds wonderful. I’ll join you.”





TWENTY-SEVEN


I waited up until I couldn’t keep my heavy eyes open a moment longer. The candles I lit for Kane’s visit had long since puddled, swallowing their wicks whole and drowning the room in shades of blue and black. I had hoped Kane would come see me before he left in the morning, but he hadn’t, and I steeled myself against the nagging hurt. I wasn’t a child. He was a king heading into a greater war than I had ever known, and the worst was yet to come.

He had more important things to do than say goodbye to his… to me.

I wasn’t sure what I was to him.

We definitely weren’t lovers, but we were more than friends.

I slipped into my nightdress and crawled under the covers. Sleep was a welcome drug, pulling me under a fog of rest and away from emotionally complicated thoughts.

I woke to the familiar smell of woody fir, and surprise gave way to warmth, unfurling inside me as I buried my face in Kane’s chest.

He was here—in my bed.

I nuzzled even closer.

We had never really cuddled before, except maybe when I was dying—which, of what I could recall, wasn’t all that romantic. I took a moment to enjoy his strong hands around my back, pressing me to him.

“You feel good,” I murmured.

He hummed his response against my ear and ran a gentle hand down my back. My nipples pebbled at his touch, my breasts becoming tight and full against the silky fabric of my nightdress.

When his finger brushed my tailbone I shivered, and a dark chuckle rumbled from his chest. I pulled back slightly and looked up at him. His body felt languid against mine, but he was breathing as heavily as I was, desire filling his eyes like endless pools.

“I thought you weren’t coming,” I said.

“I wouldn’t have missed this for anything.” He brushed a few hairs away from my face, and ran his hand up my bare thigh, his touch rough and warm and setting me on fire. I wanted to devour him—to feel him everywhere. I had wanted this for so, so long, every minute we were both still fully clothed was a tragedy.

And his extraordinary gentleness was killing me.

My eyes focused on his full lips, and I parted mine, breathless.

He leaned in as his hand ran lazily up and down my thigh, pushing my nightdress up ever so slightly. His mouth was close—

So close—

But when his fingers grazed my hip bone, he pulled back, jaw rigid and pupils flaring.

“What is it,” I breathed.

“You’re… not wearing anything under your nightdress.”

I flushed, my face somehow going hotter than it already was. “No.”

“Why not?”

A laugh slipped out at his confusion. “I don’t usually sleep in them. I don’t know. I can put some on?”

He barked out one dark, cruel laugh and then rolled onto his back with a deep, pained sigh, and a forearm draped across his eyes.

“Are you all right?” I asked, breathless, and confused by the shift in his energy.

“Not by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, I’m losing my mind a bit.”

I slunk closer to him, my breathing still uneven, and planted a single, soft kiss on his warm neck. Balsam and leather filled my senses, and I released a soft hum against his skin.

A groan, guttural and raw, fell from him and he stood, climbing off the bed all together.

I sat up, raising an eyebrow in silent question. “Do you really not want this?” I asked, slightly sheepish.

“You know I do,” he said through clenched teeth. “More than I’ve ever wanted anything.”

“So you wouldn’t prefer I sleep with someone else?”

I was only kidding, but he stalked closer, eyes blazing. He looked like he wanted to crush mountains.