A Brush with Love(85)
Dan sat there absorbing her words, a lightness slowly flooding his chest until he thought he might float. For the first time, he faced freedom, absolution from the crushing sense of duty that had plagued him for so long.
He knew what he needed to do.
CHAPTER 34
HARPER
“You look like shit.”
Harper started so violently at the unexpected voice that she bit down on her tongue and cracked her knees on the underside of her disaster of a desk. She clutched a hand to her chest and turned to see Thu leaning in the doorway.
“You scared the hell out of me! How did you get in here?”
Thu dangled Harper’s spare key from an extended finger.
“Jesus, Harps, when was the last time you slept?” Thu narrowed her gaze. “Or showered?”
Harper ran a hand through her greasy hair. She’d been so lost in studying, it had been longer than she cared to admit. More than a week had passed, and Harper had isolated herself as much as she could through it. To her dismay, her concussion had forced her to take a few days off from clinic, which felt like dumping gasoline on the already roaring fire of anxiety in her chest. When she’d finally gone back, she’d taken great measures to avoid everyone, picking up extra night rotations to catch up, sprinting home to study into the early hours of the morning. Detaching as much as she could.
If she continued to drown herself in work, she wouldn’t have to think about what happened with Dan.
“Your desk is atrocious,” Thu noted.
Harper could only nod. She used to keep it so clean and orderly, but lately it had dissolved into chaos, herds of coffee mugs and stacks of papers making it difficult for her to find anything.
Thu continued to study Harper. Something she saw made her face soften in sadness.
“Come on,” Thu said, nodding her head toward the living room.
“What are you doing here?”
Thu didn’t bother answering, already making her way down the hall. Harper sighed and saved the work on her laptop before following her friend.
Thu was laying carryout containers on the kitchen table when Harper entered. A six-pack of beer sat next to the food, and Judy jumped onto the table to investigate.
“What are you doing here?” Harper asked again. She wanted Thu to leave.
She wasn’t mad or annoyed at her friend’s invasion. She didn’t have the energy for such complicated feelings. She just wanted Thu gone so she could go back to work, back to reading word after word until her body was numb and her mental image of Dan’s pain-stricken face was blurred.
Thu turned, anger flashing in her eyes.
“What am I doing here? Oh, I don’t know, Harper. Maybe it has something to do with you having a massive meltdown? Or maybe it has something to do with you avoiding me at school? Or ignoring my texts and calls for over a week? Or maybe it’s the fact that I knew if I broke into your apartment, I’d find you greasy-haired and tearstained, hunched over a textbook, looking like Gollum?”
The words floated through Harper. She could understand their meaning, but she couldn’t feel them. She couldn’t feel much. Just pain. And if she tried hard enough, she could pretend she didn’t feel that either.
Thu moved suddenly, wrapping Harper in a strong hug, squeezing her tightly. Harper wasn’t sure what to do; her arms didn’t seem to be working. A sudden sense of exhaustion flooded her, and she felt her body soften under Thu’s embrace.
“I’m here to figure out what the fuck is going on. And then to help you fix it.”
“Thu, I—”
“Shut up. We aren’t talking right now.”
Thu dropped her arms and returned to the food. She picked up a container, grabbed two beers, and settled onto the couch. When Harper didn’t immediately follow, Thu fixed her with a no-nonsense glare. Harper reluctantly grabbed a carton of Thai food and sat next to Thu.
The food was from her favorite spot, the same place Dan always picked up takeout for her. The familiar smell of it made her stomach knot.
“Eat.”
“Thu, I appreciate all of this, but I’ve got to get back to—” Harper pointed toward her bedroom, but Thu cut her off before she could finish.
“Eat the goddamn food, or I’ll hurt you.”
Harper didn’t have the energy to fight.
She wrapped a small rice noodle around her fork and brought it to her lips. Glancing back at Thu, who still gave her the evil eye, Harper ate the noodle. It was delicious. She tried to remember the last time she ate, and when she came up blank, she began shoving bigger bites into her mouth.
“Now, drink.” Thu twisted off the caps of the bottles and thrust one at Harper. Harper opened her mouth to protest, but one look at Thu’s cocked head and challenging eyes forced her to accept it. She took a tiny sip and set it down, digging back into her food.
Seemingly satisfied with Harper’s steady consumption, Thu turned on the TV. And flipped to football.
Intentionally.
Thu intentionally put on sports.
Something was terribly wrong.
Harper waited for Thu to crack a joke or turn it into a ‘gotcha’ moment, but after several minutes without Thu’s eyes leaving the screen and even a loud “Oh!” at a tackle, Harper’s curiosity won out.
“So … what’s this?”