You Had Me At Christmas: A Holiday Anthology(22)
“I didn’t want to doubt her motives when she was telling me I could be the next John Entwhistle.” His jaw tightened. “I was a gullible idiot.”
“Simone wouldn’t undermine her professional credibility for an affair. You’ll be another Entwhistle.” Kayla managed a small smile. “Whoever the hell he is.”
Jared focused on her smile like a drowning man sighting a lifeboat. “Bassist with The Who.”
“This one!” Maddie stopped at a display of artificial trees flocked in a rainbow of colors. Kayla moved her away from the black one.
“You can’t be a Goth until you’re a teenager. And we’re getting real.”
They wandered through the lot inspecting the different species on offer. Jared showed Maddie how to roll the needles between her fingers to release the different scents, the citrus fragrance of the white fir, the pine scent of the Douglas fir. Her presence kept conversation general, but occasionally Kayla felt Jared’s gaze, the brush of anxious care. Are we okay?
How did she feel about his confession? Better, she decided after delicately prodding around the edges of the hurt. No longer paralyzed. This wasn’t a man awakening to the sexual possibilities of other women, the beginning of a pattern leading inexorably to infidelity. It was a one-off, a geek’s music crush.
If Simone hadn’t been so hell bent on screwing her husband, Kayla would never have been jealous of their friendship. The Frenchwoman was a homewrecker, willful and selfish. And her frequent hints that Kayla wasn’t woman enough to hold Jared had found fertile ground when Kayla was already feeling insecure—the starter wife—and ignored by her husband.
Some of that Jared could fix and taking responsibility helped. Rebuilding trust would take a little longer. She was wary now of being hurt, wary of giving as freely as she once had.
Some of it, Kayla had to fix. The inner monologue was hers. I’m not pretty enough, skinny enough, interesting enough. As long as Jared was in rock ‘n’ roll, there would always be brazen women wanting her husband. She had to find a way to deal with that. And find a way to regain her sexual mojo.
They chose a six-foot noble fir, silvery green with short, sturdy branches that would make it easy for small hands to hang ornaments. The tree guy, a chatty dude dressed in shorts, puffer jacket and a beanie gave the branches a trim and attached the stand. Leaving Jared to lift it onto the roof-racks, Kayla re-settled the kids in the car, and then lent her husband a hand tying it down.
As they were wiping tree resin off their fingers with tissues before touching the car doors, she said offhandedly, “Is it difficult? Turning down all the opportunities?”
“Is it hard for you?” he challenged.
“Yeah, men are really lining up.”
“The guy at the bar the other night was keen.”
She nearly dropped the tissue. “You noticed that?”
“Of course. The dude who sold us the tree is checking you out right now.” Glancing over her shoulder, she saw the young guy admiring her ass. Caught out, he blushed and waved sheepishly. She waved back.
“And no, it’s not difficult.” His tone was matter of fact. “I love you. We exchanged vows. Sleeping around isn’t on the table.” Holding out his hand for her discarded tissue, he balled it and tossed it into a nearby trash can.
“I have nothing against you appreciating sexy women,” she clarified. “I’m not a hypocrite.”
His dark eyes gleamed. “My bandmates always delayed putting their shirts on until you got to our dressing room, babe.”
“Oh God, was I that obvious?” She laughed and went with it. “Well, good, because I have no plans to give that up. So…yeah, you can keep looking at sexy women.”
“I’m looking at one now,” he said and opened her driver’s door.
Fluttery and flustered, she went to get in the car, but he stopped her, his gaze sobering. “I’m so sorry. For all of it. I promise I won’t let my ego get out of control again.”
Last night, drunk, he’d stood on the outside table and yelled, “King of the f*cking world.” She pushed the image out of her mind. “Thank you,” she said softly. “I needed that assurance.”
When they arrived home, Jared unloaded the tree under Maddie’s supervision, while Kayla took Rocco inside and settled him for a nap. Returning to the living room, she hesitated, then detoured to their bedroom and retrieved a white box from the top of the wardrobe.
Moving the fine tissue paper aside, she fingered the smooth satin of the corset she’d bought in Edinburgh for a kiss-and-make-up date. Tartan-patterned, though she doubted any Scotswoman would wear it for anything other than sexy fun times.
The last-minute purchase had made her late for her rendezvous with Jared, and she’d had to run, arriving twenty minutes late, breathless and excited…only to see Simone kissing him.
She lifted the garment, holding it against her.
Maybe it was time to reclaim the optimism she’d felt when buying it. Green and red, its colors worked perfectly for the festive season. Bob could have an early Christmas present. After checking Jared’s schedule with Dimity, she made a couple of calls and then sent a text.
Bob. Hot date alert. Be ready at six p.m. on Sunday night. It’s a sleepover, so pack a change of clothes.
Kayla hesitated, biting her lip. What the hell.