When the Heart Falls(115)

"You're welcome. But don't think this gets you off the hook for what you did to Winter." I grab her purse, and though my mother taught me never to go into a lady's purse, I reach in, pull out the small bottle of white pills, open it, and dump them all into the toilet. With a flush, I destroy what I hope is her only drug stash.

She tries to stop me, but it's too late. Her lips are pulled down into a pout, but she's having a hard time making eye contact, and I imagine it's more than just her recent injury. Hopefully she realizes how recklessly she acted tonight. "Are there any more?"

She shakes her head. "No."

"Keep it that way."

I drop her purse on the counter and stalk out of the bathroom. Her voice stops me as I'm about to let the door go.

"Cade. Wait. Is she going to be okay? Winter?"

I look back at her, a sarcastic retort on my tongue, but when I see how forlorn she looks, I hold back. "Yeah, she'll be okay. Get some rest."

Confident she can manage to get herself back to her room now, I head back to mine.

Seeing Winter laying so helpless on my bed stops me short. Her black, silky hair cascades over my pillow like a dark waterfall. Pale, and so still, she looks like Snow White and my heart stops, imagining her in a crystal coffin of eternal sleep. As small as she is, carrying her half the way home when she passed out didn't strain me at all, but still, the night has taken its toll, and I slump into the other bed, my eyes never leaving her.

Her eyes flutter open revealing blue orbs with so many secrets. My anger at Jenifer returns when I consider all that could have happened to Winter tonight. "You have a real nice friend there." I don’t mean to sound so snarky, but I've never been good at pretending to act in a way contrary to what I'm feeling—which makes being around Winter all the more difficult.

Winter sighs and grips my pillow, and I wonder if it will smell like her when I sleep on it next. "She just wanted me to have fun." Her voice still sounds disconnected from her mind, her smile too bright. "She's harmless."

"Drugs aren't harmless." Once again I find myself reaching into a lady's purse. "And neither are these." I hold up the pepper spray and knife. "It's illegal to carry these here without a license."

"How do you know?"

"It's called research." What is it about this girl that makes me want to protect her? I'm here to study, to pass my French class and decide once and for all which direction my life will go, not to play knight in shining armor to a girl who keeps finding herself in troubling situations.

Remembering what brought this whole thing on in the first place, I change the subject to something that won't make me angry. "You probably have allergies. The red face, itchy ears, all that? Make sure to get some medicine tomorrow. You're sleeping here tonight." I hadn't decided that until the words were out of my mouth, but I realize they're true. I can't let her leave, not until I know she's okay.

"Why?" Her eyes fall shut, as if asleep.

"I'm not leaving you alone with Jenifer. Not like this."

Not asleep. She nods, and I'm glad she's not fighting me.

"I'll get rid of the pepper spray and knife." I shake the can and stand to leave, but Winter reaches out for me, catching my hand in hers.

"Don't go." She's looking up at me, her eyes big and sad. She looks so delicate, with her high cheekbones and soft lips, like a flower about to blossom, or ice about to break.

She pulls my hand to her chest, and I feel the swell of her breast, the cool touch of her skin, so smooth and tempting.

With more strength than I gave her credit for, she pulls harder until I'm sitting next to her on the bed, her body wrapped partially around me, thighs, stomach and chest pressed against me. My pants tighten uncomfortably as the attraction that's been growing between us hits me. I shift to adjust myself, my eyes glued to her, my breath coming in short bursts. I can't remember wanting a woman this badly. Ever.

As her eyes close again, I give in to one small temptation and bend down to kiss her forehead, then place her hand on the bed and pull myself out of her embrace.

"Cade… my Cade" she whispers my name with a breath, then falls into her dreams.

Grabbing my toiletries, I head to the bathroom. My body feels hot. Too hot. I need to cool off, to think. Getting close to this girl is a bad idea. She's not a one night stand or a summer fling. I refuse to treat her as such.

As I force myself not to think of her, my mind wanders to Stevie. Being the caregiver is a role I'm used to. I miss him more tonight than I have since I left. I wonder how he's doing, if he's taking his medicine without a fight and getting enough nutrients. I hope my parents are spending time with him, talking to him, paying him some attention, not just seeing to his physical and medical needs. He won't thrive without interpersonal connection.

I pause at the shower stall and pull out my cellphone, scrolling down to Mom's number. My finger hovers over the call button, but instead I press cancel, close the phone and put it away.

Stepping into the shower, I let the hot water pour over me, washing away my guilt and fear… at least for a few minutes.





WINTER DEVEAUX

CHAPTER 9





SHARP PAIN—the kind that shreds your brain and leaves you a zombie—pulls me from a delicious dream that I can't remember but will always wish I could. My eyes burn when I try to open them, the light streaming through the dorm window cutting through me like a laser, and I have a random thought that someone must have turned me into a vampire last night. It's the only thing I can imagine that would cause this much misery.