Twisted Fate(41)

“I have a site and you can buy any of my stuff about Rockland or my experimental stuff; once the payment processes, the file downloads. I told you, people have spent hundreds of dollars, sometimes more, for my films. I wasn’t lying. I need to make money so I can do my major feature-length film.”

Declan looked like he was going to be sick. “Graham,” he said. “Do you know who downloads the films—is there a record?”

“I guess. It’s all through PayPal and my Amazon wish list. People buy me things from my wish list and then they get the movie. The ones of kids talking are pretty popular because I guess everyone loves kids. I actually thought I’d film Brian for a long time—like over his life, so you can see how he changes. Like in the documentary 35 Up. Have you seen it?”

“Graham,” Becky said, her voice shaking. “This movie has all of Brian’s personal information in it.”

“I know. It’s amazing how much he talks.”

“No,” she said. “I mean, you sold this thing and it has the kid’s address and everything on it.”

“Yours does too,” he said. Still seeming not to get it.

Becky glanced at me with incredulous fury and was about to say something to Graham but Declan cut her off.

“We have to take this to the police and find out who downloaded the movie,” Declan said.

Then Graham started to look freaked-out. “Oh my God, no way! We cannot take any of this to the police.”

“We have to!” I shouted. “Are you crazy? This kid could be out there and maybe they could find him right away because of this.”

Graham stood up and started pacing around.

“No,” he said. “No way. I didn’t do this so someone would hurt Brian. This is just a movie.”

“Didn’t you ever wonder why so many people were buying your movies?” Declan asked.

“Because they’re good!” Graham said. Then he looked sheepish and shrugged like maybe he did know. “Whatever,” he said defensively. “This is my job and my art; I’m not going to go to the police and have them take everything away from me. This is just what happened with the stuff me and Eric made. Why can’t people understand art when they see it?”

Declan and I exchanged shocked looks.

“What kind of movies did you and Eric make?” Declan asked.

“Beautiful movies,” he said. “Beautiful, beautiful movies.”





He called me in the middle of the night and his voice was rough with sleep or sleeplessness.

“You can’t let them do this to me,” he said. “You understand how I feel and what I’m doing. I don’t know why everyone tries to blame me for the things that go wrong.”

“Shhh,” I whispered into the phone, and then slipped out of bed and into the bathroom so I could have more privacy. “What’s going on?”

“You can’t let them take this stuff to the police. I had nothing to do with what happened to Brian.”

“Shh. Shh. Shh. It’s okay.”

“Meet me outside,” he said. “Down in my backyard by the fountain.”

I would have said no but he sounded so upset and frightened I agreed. “Okay,” I said. “Ten minutes.”

I had never done anything like this in my life but I had never heard someone sound so afraid before. I put on my sweatshirt and wool socks, then grabbed my shoes and carried them down the stairs so I wouldn’t make noise. Then I crept quietly over the creaky floors to the back door and slipped out.

The sky was a deep black-blue and stars shone brightly down. The moon was a little silver crescent. I could see him already beneath the fountain staring into the woods. He was wearing a black hoodie with a flannel shirt under it and his same Diesel jeans. He had a blanket wrapped around his shoulders. The water in the fountain was burbling. It shone liquid and lovely in the starlight. Even though he was upset and I was doing something I shouldn’t be doing I had an incredible sense of freedom being outside in secret with no one around.

When he saw me, he ran forward and held me in his arms. Rested his head on my shoulder. I could feel how much he needed to be hugged and we stood that way for a long time.

“What’s going on?” I said finally.

He looked at me annoyed and confused for a moment and then shook his head. “Please, you have to know I had nothing to do with anything bad that may have happened to Brian. I thought he was a nice kid and a really interesting subject.”

I laughed a little at the way he said it. “Yeah,” I said. “I know you did.”

“Don’t let Declan and Becky go to the police.”

“I can’t make Syd and her friends do anything,” I said.

He held both my hands and squeezed them and looked intently into my face.

“You can, though. You can influence her. You can talk to her. Listen, you and me understand each other. I know we do. We know what it’s like to be shy and outside and different and see things that other people don’t.”

He was staring at me so intensely and his face was beautiful and pale in the starlight. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes looked dark and frightened like an animal’s.

“I don’t know anything about this,” I said. “If you have some information the police need maybe you could just give it to them yourself. You can explain that you were working on this documentary. You just give them what you have. I don’t think they would take it away from you.”