Toxic: Logan's Story (Torn #4)(11)

“I…wow, I don’t even know what to say, Jade. I can’t imagine just leaving home and not talking to anyone for so long.”

“It’s not so bad. Like I said, the guys are my family now. The only person I truly miss is my sister. Once she turns eighteen, I plan on hunting her down. If I tried to see her now, I doubt my mom and stepdad would let me. My stepdad is an ass for sure, but in some ways, my mom is worse.”

“If your stepdad was as bad as you say, weren’t you worried about leaving your sister alone with him?” I asked.

She gave me a weak smile. “She’s only my half-sister. She’s his actual kid, so he wasn’t mean to her. He hated me because my mom had f*cked around on him and ended up with me. They hated me for something I had no say in.”

I frowned. “And I thought my life was screwed-up. I’m sorry you had to go through all of that, Jade. It’s bullshit.”

“Don’t feel sorry for me. I’m happy now, happier than I ever was there. One day, when the band makes it big, I’m going to go back home and rub it in all their faces. I’m going to tell both of them how much I hate them.”

Neither of us spoke for a long time after that. Instead, we drank shot after shot, both of us trying to forget. I was sure Jade was lost in memories of her old life, and I was torn between thinking about everything with Chloe and worrying about Jade.

Chloe’s mom had always terrified me. I’d seen Chloe come to school with bruises and cuts more times than I could count. I couldn’t help but wonder if Jade had gone through something similar. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to know.

Regardless of how these women had grown up, it was obvious that they were incredibly strong. I knew that they had to be damaged mentally from the abuse they dealt with, but they had rarely shown it, especially Jade. I’d known her for a few months now, and I’d always thought of her as a strong person. She had to be since she dealt with Eric, Adam, and Drake day and night.

Before I realized what had happened, I was drunk—not the stumbling-around-and-puking kind of drunk but a happy drunk. With the exception of the last few weeks, I rarely drank. I’d seen how Chloe’s mom was when she was drunk, and I wanted no part in something that did that kind of damage to a person. But this wasn’t that kind of drunk. Instead, I felt weightless and relaxed. While I knew things weren’t even close to being back to normal, for the first time since everything had happened, I had hope that I would be happy again. I knew it was just the alcohol talking, but I didn’t mind. I liked it. Between school and Chloe, I was always stressed. It was nice to just let loose for the night and chill.

It dawned on me that I looked forward to these nights with Jade more than I’d realized. I looked up to see her absentmindedly running her finger around the rim of her shot glass. Without either of us realizing it, she was quickly becoming my go-to friend. She was becoming important to me, and I’d be damned if that didn’t scare me. I never got close to anyone with the exception of Chloe and Amber. I wasn’t sure how I felt about my realization that Jade was important to me. Being close to her left me open and vulnerable. Over the past month, I’d had enough of feeling vulnerable.

I stared at her, taking all of her in. She reminded me so much of Chloe with her rocker-chick style, but they were so different. Both of them were beautiful in their own way. I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t noticed just how beautiful Jade was before now. She had just the right amount of feminism and ball-busting attitude that it made for a deadly combination.

I racked my brain, trying to remember if I’d ever seen her with a guy. I couldn’t think of a time when I had. I’d seen Adam and Drake leave the bar with a one-night stand tons of times. Hell, even quiet Eric had picked girls up occasionally. Jade never did—at least, not that I’d noticed, and I’d been to tons of their shows.

“Why are you staring at me like that?” Jade asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

I’d been looking at her for God only knew how long. I grinned sheepishly as I dropped my eyes to the floor.

“You’re beautiful,” I stated without really thinking about it.

When she didn’t say anything, I looked up to see her watching me.

Finally, she grinned. “If you’re starting to spout off shit like that, you’ve had too much Jack tonight, my friend.”

I gave her a questioning look. “What do you mean?”

“You’ve spent the last few months with Chloe, Logan.”

“So?”

“Chloe’s gorgeous.”

“What’s your point?” I asked, getting annoyed fast. Why can’t she just take the damn compliment like a normal person?

“I’m not even close to Chloe. After being with her, there’s no way you can think I’m pretty.”

I studied her, waiting for sarcastic Jade to break free. Instead, I saw the truth in her eyes. She really thought that she wasn’t pretty. She wasn’t just fishing for compliments.

I stood and walked over to where she was sitting. I crouched down on the floor in front of her. “Jade, you and Chloe look absolutely nothing alike, but that doesn’t mean you’re not beautiful. You are.”

Her eyes widened, and she quickly looked away. “Well, thanks then.”

I reached forward and grabbed her face to pull her back toward me. “Who told you that you weren’t beautiful?”