Toxic (Denazen #2)(75)

All the empty tables in the place and a man the size of a Volvo has to wedge himself into this one? He crashed into the seat backing Jade’s—the one Kiernan and I were in—and his two kids climbed in across from him. One had a can of soda, the other was waving a headless Barbie doll that looked like it’d been dragged through the mud.

We were squashed against the wall, a few inches of free space separating us from the booth’s large new occupant. “Now what?”

Pounding the table and kicking the seat, the two kids screamed, demanding hot fudge sundaes.

“What’s that smell?” Kiernan pinched her nose.

As if to answer, the man next to us leaned toward the aisle slightly and fired off the most foul-smelling butt burp ever launched.

“OhmyGod.” I gagged. Frantically waving my hand back and forth to clear the air, I tried to lean over the seat to hear what Kale was saying. With the kids pounding on the table, it was impossible. I could see his lips moving but couldn’t quite make out the words.

“Move!” Kiernan pushed me up onto the table. “He’s about to blow again.”

She pushed past, knocking over the kid’s soda can in her haste. It tumbled off the table and into the younger one’s lap, inciting an entirely new crying jag.

“Quick! She’s heading to the bathroom.” Kiernan jerked me forward before I could dismount the table. I slipped in the soda and crashed to the floor, dragging her down with me.

Of course the chaos didn’t end there.

The Six version of a classic Lucy and Ethel bit, Kiernan and I, sprawled across the floor, didn’t have time to move. A woman in a pencil skirt and tacky blouse—something I might have expected Dad’s flunky Mercy to wear—came rushing down the aisle. I tried to move my leg, but the area was too narrow, and there was nowhere for it to go. Since we had somehow managed to not break contact, we were still cloaked by Kiernan’s ability. The woman’s foot caught under my knee, and she went flying—right toward Kale, who’d just gotten up from his table. In an attempt to save herself, the woman made a grab for him, but he jumped back onto the seat and out of her way. She crashed to the floor with a shriek, skirt splitting up the side.

I didn’t waste time. Hauling Kiernan off the ground, I steered us around the cursing woman and into the bathroom.

“Ugh. I don’t understand it,” Jade’s voice growled. I should have had this wrapped up by now.”

I gave Kiernan an I-told-you-so grin and scrunched down to see which stall Jade was skulking in. Last one on the right. “Come on.”

Inside the stall, Jade mumbled something too low for me to hear, then said, “I swear. I’ll get him.”

Slipping in to the stall next to her, I carefully closed the door. “Here.” I braced my hand against the divider wall. One foot balanced on the edge of the toilet, I said, “Grab my leg.”

“Grab your leg? You’re going to what, watch her take a dump?”

I rolled my eyes. “She’s on her cell.”

Kiernan sighed and grabbed my ankle.

Hauling myself up, I lifted onto my toes. “Crap. I’m, like, an inch too short. Hang on.” Twisting, I placed my right foot on the toilet paper dispenser and hopped up.

“Stop moving,” Kiernan snapped. “I almost let go!”

I ignored her and wrapped my fingers over the edge of the stall, pulling forward. “Bet if I knew Parkour, this wouldn’t be so damn complicated,” I mumbled. I’d just cleared the edge, the top of Jade’s red head finally in view, when something cracked.

“Um, Dez? What was—”

Under my right foot, the paper dispenser broke free from the wall and crashed to the ground. I went with it.

I hit the floor with a jar, knocking my head against the edge of the toilet. Something smacked me in the face. Fingers.

“Ow!”

Kiernan squealed. “Oh, my God. I think I’m sitting in pee!”

“Oh, my God,” Jade’s voice snapped from the stall next door. She pounded on the metal divider several times before sighing. “What are you doing in there?”

I reached for the coat hook and tried to haul myself up. “Relax. It’s probably just water.”

“I’m so not loving you right now,” Kieran breathed, pulling herself up. She unlatched the door and pushed it open. “And stop wiggling. She heard us because I lost contact, like, twice already!”

Next to us, the toilet flushed, and Jade’s door swung open. She straightened her shirt and walked across to the sinks. She shot a quick glance at the stall we were in, its door swinging open, then at the door, and shrugged.

“He might be weird,” she said, turning back to the mirror. “But he’s endgame material.” She turned on the faucet and soaped up her hands.

My boyfriend was not weird. He was perfect. Dragging Kiernan across the room, I kicked hard at the pipe beneath the sink. It took exactly three blows for it to come apart, sending water shooting in all directions.

We left Jade battling water and squealing like a five-year-old.





28


“Are you okay?” I heard Kale ask when Jade finally emerged from the bathroom. Her hair was slicked back, and her shirt was soaked.

She mumbled something and paid the bill, then followed him out the door.