Torn(19)

I should have hated him for that. I should have walked out of his life for good but his wife, Bell, was the one who brought us back together.

Caleb has no idea that Bell confided in me about the morning that the police called Caleb after he filed a missing person's report because I'd taken off. A man's body had been found in a cheap motel room littered with needles.

He thought it was me. He lost it. Bell told me how Caleb had cried when he thought I was dead. She shared what he said about wanting another chance with me. I'll never forget that.

Caleb's always been the one just out of my reach. He's been the one I've worked the hardest to prove myself to. We've gotten close since I started my career in music. He's proud of me. He tells me every chance he can. He's finally the brother I've always needed and now, I'm questioning whether that'll change if I tell him what I discovered about our family two days ago.

"Gabe said you were taking off soon." He glances at me. "You know I would have been pissed if you left New York without telling me."

I lean back in the leather chair I'm sitting in. "Gabriel hates when you call him that."

"That's why I do it." He takes a long, slow sip from the bottle of water he grabbed out of the refrigerator when he showed up at my apartment. "You seem on edge."

I feel my jaw tighten. After he called fifteen minutes ago saying he was on his way over, I put the envelope Daniel dropped off in the safe that's built into the wall of the closet in my bedroom. I hid those secrets away so no one would stumble on them, especially my brothers.

"It's a woman, isn't it? You must have them lining up."

I turn to look at him, blinking at the sight of his eyes. They're a different shade of brown than mine. I never noticed that until now. "I met someone the other day. She used to work for Noah."

"Noah? Our cousin? Doing what?"

I rub my hand over the back of my neck, suddenly feeling the unmistakable grip of tension. "She was his assistant. She handled those new promotional shots that the label wanted of me."

"She's a photographer?" He straightens. "That's different for you, isn't it? You're more the supermodel type."

I'm more the 'whoever is available for a night type.'

"That's not my scene." I hesitate. "I dated one model. She was great but it ran its course."

"You like this girl, don't you?"

I give him a smile. "She's f*cking beautiful, Caleb. I can't get her out of my mind."

"What are you doing about it?"

Other than pissing her off yesterday when I pulled back, nothing. I spent most of last night back at Hugo's place, working on that new song. It was useless. I couldn’t concentrate knowing she was out with someone else. I had my chance. I f*cked it up royally.

He doesn't wait for me to answer. "I've never heard you say a girl is beautiful, Asher. She's special, isn't she?"

"I barely know her," I say honestly. "There's just something about her that's different."

"Don't waste time debating whether you should make a move." His gaze drops to the water bottle in his hand. "I did that with Bell. I wasted years."

I know he did. We all do. Caleb fought everything he felt for Bell for most of his adult life because he was scared he'd damage the friendship they had since they were kids. They're happy now, but it wasn't easy for them to get there.

"I didn't say I wanted to marry her, Caleb." I laugh. "I met her two days ago."

I watch as he pushes himself to his feet. "I know exactly what you want to do with her. If she's like all the other girls who throw their panties at you at your concerts, you're gold. You're Asher Foster, for Christ's sake. Go see her. I'll bet you a twenty she wants you as much as you want her."

I'd make money on that wager. After yesterday, I doubt like hell Falon wants me to shine her shoes, let alone f*ck her.

"You're taking off?" I stand too. "You just got here."

"I need to run." He taps the palm of his left hand on his bare thigh. "I mean literally run. I'm working towards a marathon. I dropped by because I forgot my water bottle and because Bell wants you to come over for dinner before you take off again."

I scan his frame, realizing for the first time, since he got here that he's dressed in his running clothes. It's a new passion of his, one he took up to balance the stress of the family business. "Tell her to call me. My schedule is up in the air right now."

It's not. My life is. There's no way I can sit through a family dinner this week, or anytime soon. I'm too f*cked up to hold it together around Bell. She's one of my closest friends. She'll know something is wrong the minute she sees me.

"Will do, Junior."

The nickname hits me with the brutal force of a punch in the gut. He didn't start calling me that until a year ago. It came out of nowhere and stuck. I've never complained. I never will. He'd stop if he knew. Everything between us would change if he was aware of the secret our parents have kept hidden from us.

"Call the photographer." He slaps me on the back. "Do it before it's too late and she meets someone else."

I watch him walk out before I pick my phone up off the table, pull up Falon's number and call her.