Today Will Be Different(63)

My little son. What a smarty. What a sweetie.

“Always ahead of me, you are.”

With my good hand, I held out my toothbrush. “Hit me with some of that.” Timby squeezed paste on it.

We began brushing.

After a moment, I stopped.

I lowered my toothbrush. I turned to Timby.

“I have a sister,” I said. “Her name is Ivy. She’s four years younger than I am and she lives in New Orleans with her husband and two children. That means you have an aunt and an uncle and two cousins you’ve never met.”

Timby lowered his hand, leaving his brush sticking out of his foamy mouth. He studied me in the mirror.

Now the hard part.

“Even though they don’t know us,” I said, “they don’t like us.”

Timby pulled out his toothbrush, spit into the sink, and looked up.

“They know you,” he said. “But they don’t know me.”





Today will be different. Today I will be present. Today, anyone I speak to, I will look them in the eye and listen deeply to what they’re saying. Today I’ll wear a dress. Today I’ll play a board game with Timby. I’ll initiate sex with Joe. I won’t swear. I won’t talk about money. Today there will be an ease about me. My face will be relaxed, its resting place a smile. Today I will keep an open mind. Today I won’t eat sugar. I’ll start to memorize “One Art.” Today I’ll try to score Timby and me tickets to the Pope. I’ll ask around about Scotland. I’ll clean out my car. Today I will be my best self, the person I’m capable of being. Today will be different.





Acknowledgments


Thank you…

Anna Stein, Judith Clain, Nicole Dewey Barbara Heller, Holly Goldberg Sloan, Carol Cassella, Courtney Hodell, Katherine Stirling Eric Anderson, Daniel Clowes, Patrick Semple Reagan Arthur, Michael Pietsch, Craig Young, Lisa Erickson, Terry Adams, Amanda Brower, Karen Torres, Keith Hayes, Mario Pulice, Julie Ertl, Andy LeCount, Tracy Roe, Karen Landry, Jayne Yaffe Kemp, Lauren Passell Arzu Tahsin

Clare Alexander, Mary Marge Locker, Claire Nozieres, Roxane Edouard Ed Skoog, Kevin Auld, Nicholas Vesey, Phil Stutz, Tim Davis, Kenny Coble Howard Sanders, Jason Richman, Larry Salz Joyce Semple, Lorenzo Semple Jr., Johanna Herwitz, Lorenzo Semple III Peeper Meyer

These pages begin and end with George Meyer, as do I.