The Yellow Rose Beauty Shop (Cadillac, Texas #3)(63)

“It ain’t for me.” Agnes’s eyes settled on Piper and she nodded. “Liquor? Yep, that’s it. Your job is to go to a liquor store and buy whatever looks and smells like moonshine. Whiskey won’t do. It’ll make the punch taste funny.”

“Agnes Flynn!” Stella gasped.

“It’s just for the little punch bowl. The big one is going to have red punch in it. Nancy already told me so. But there’s going to be a little one on a second table for folks like Heather. She tells people that she’s allergic to the pineapple juice that goes into red punch. The smaller punch bowl will have something made out of white grape juice, so whiskey would sure show up in it.”

“Vodka,” Piper said.

“That’ll work,” Agnes said. “Just don’t let nobody see you gettin’ it or it might set off an alarm. She has to drink it for my plan to work.”

“And what is this plan?” Stella asked.

“To make this the only Yellow Rose Barbecue Redneck Ball in Cadillac. The jubilee and the chili cook-off are enough. And I sure don’t want it to have the name of your beauty shop,” Agnes answered.

Stella was just glad that it wasn’t her job to buy liquor. It wouldn’t bode well for the preacher’s wife to be seen in the liquor store and someone would be bound to see her even if she tried to buy it in Sherman or Denison. Then when she and Jed announced that they’d been married more than two months, someone would remember that she’d bought liquor after they were married. Gossips were very good at remembering dates and times!

Agnes pointed at her. “Your job is to get one of them flash-point-drive things that you put into a computer and get someone to fill it plumb up with country music. I want that kind that you can do the hoochy-cooch to. Ain’t no way we’re goin’ to be bored to death with a bunch of waltzes from the Civil War days.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Stella said.

“And Charlotte’s job?” Piper asked.

“You tell her to come see me tomorrow. We’ve got some discussin’ to do. Now I’ll be goin’ to my therapy here in about five minutes, so y’all best scoot on out of here.”

“Does Violet go to the same therapy?” Piper asked.

“Hell, yeah, she does.” Agnes grinned. “But she’s a big baby. I hope she whines around until she loses every bit of her clout in Cadillac.”

“Heather is going to be just as bad,” Stella said.

“I can handle that girl with one hand tied behind my back and I’m about to prove it. Y’all know that she ain’t from Tulsa like she says. She’s from a little bitty place that ain’t got five hundred people about fifty miles west of there. Town called Ripley. She went to college in Tulsa and wants everyone to think she’s big city.”

“Well, how about that?” Stella smiled.

Agnes pointed at the door. “They’ll be comin’ to take me to the therapy room any minute now, so it’s really time to go, girls. Y’all come back anytime. And tell Charlotte I want to see her tomorrow.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Piper said.



Charlotte had a cancellation late in the day so she reached the rehab center by five thirty. Stella and Piper each had a job to throw wrenches into the barbecue ball. With Heather tipsy and country instead of classical music playing, there didn’t seem to be much else that was needed. But if Agnes summoned her, by golly, there was no way she wasn’t putting in an appearance.

“I brought you a chocolate cupcake from that fancy shop down the street,” she said as she entered the room.

“Thank God! Bring it over here and I’ll eat it while you call in a large pizza. They brought liver and onions for supper. I like onions but I hate liver. We’ll share us a pizza and visit a spell,” Agnes said.

“Only if the nurse says it’s all right,” Charlotte said.

Agnes pushed her call button and a lady poked her head inside the door. “Yes, ma’am?”

“I want pizza. Y’all got a problem with my friend going to get it for me?”

“No, honey. You can eat whatever you want, and between you and me, I wouldn’t have eaten that supper they brought in here, either,” the duty nurse said.

“Thank you.” Agnes peeled the paper from the cupcake and talked between bites. “I bet Violet ain’t got a cupcake. If I had the energy, I’d get in my wheelchair and go past her room with chocolate on my mouth.”

“Agnes Flynn! Breaking a hip hasn’t slowed you down a bit.”

“Hell, no, it didn’t slow me down. It just gave me more time to plot and plan for the barbecue ball. You know we ain’t got but two weeks to get it all planned out and ready to go.”

A smile turned up the corners of Charlotte’s mouth. “You are incorrigible, woman. What kind of pizza do you want?” Charlotte dug her phone from her purse and flipped through the contact list to find the number for the pizza place.

“Supreme with extra bell peppers,” Agnes said. “And a side order of jalape?os. They won’t be as hot as what Cathy grows, but they’ll do. And I want the biggest sweet tea they sell. The tea they got in here ain’t got a bit of sugar in it. And yes, I’m incorrigible. If I hadn’t been, Violet would have destroyed Cadillac years ago with all that bullshit she puts out.”