The Story of Me (Carnage #2)(116)
“Get me out of here, Ben,” I tell him.
He shakes his head. “Na, George, let’s just go inside and we’ll wait for Cam and let him explain for himself what’s going on.”
“Get me out of here now, Ben.”
“How about you come to the airport with me and we meet him there together, George,‘ay? How bout we do that, sweetheart?” I shake my head, my phone rings and its Tamara’s name showing up on the caller ID. Cam gave me her number in case there was an emergency and he must’ve given mine to her.
“Hello?”
“You really thought you had it all worked out, didn’t you? You really thought that he would change for you? He won’t change for anyone, but he will come back to me. He’ll always come back to me.” I end the call with a shaky hand and turn my phone to silent. I close my eyes for a few seconds and try to think. I need somewhere to go, somewhere to be alone, somewhere the press won’t be waiting for me. I take a deep breath.
“Ben, will you please take me back to the city? I wanna go to the loft. You can drop me there, please.”
“George…”
“Ben, if you don’t start driving I’ll get out and start walking, now drive the f*cking car.”
“What loft, George?”
Shit, I’ve not been there since Sean died. Cam knows about it, but we’ve never been there. It’s Sean’s place. I would never take Cam there.
I give Benny directions and we drive in silence back into the city. I turn off the radio. I’m not in the mood for music right now, so I sit and lose myself in my own twisted thoughts and overactive imagination.
I know by coming here that I’m reverting and doing what I’ve always done in the past. But running away is just how I cope when things feel out of my control. Running away is my choice. Something I’ve chosen to do, therefore putting me back in control.
Benny opens my door. We’ve stopped outside the old warehouse and I didn’t even realise it. Benny’s top lip is sweating and I know it’s not from the afternoon sunshine.
“Ben, look, I know you need to do your job and tell him where you dropped me, but please tell him not to come here expecting to see me. Tell him to let me have some space and I’ll talk to him when I’m ready.” Benny lets out a big huff.
“I can try, George, but that big f*cker don’t see sense where you’re concerned. He’ll be here, and he’ll bang that door down till he gets to you. Mark my words, girl, he won’t leave till he sees ya.”
I say nothing, kiss Benny on the cheek and turn and tap my number into the security doors. I put my hand up in acknowledgement to the two doormen in the office and head for the lift.
*
I step inside the apartment and know in an instant this is wrong. I’ve done the wrong thing coming here. This is Sean’s place. Me coming here is going to hurt Cam and I’ve done it without even waiting to hear his side of the story. I did that once before with Sean and it cost us four precious years.
I pull out my phone and call for a cab to come and fetch me to take me to Cam’s apartment. It’s just ten minutes away and I could walk, but I’m worried about the paps.
I go back downstairs and wait in the lobby for the cab to arrive. It’s a big black London taxi and the driver reminds me of my Uncle Finn. I talk to him through the window and explain that I need to get into my apartment block, but the press might be waiting for me. Once he realises who I am, he agrees to help me out. I give him the code to the underground car park and he gives me his jacket and tells me to get down in the foot well in the front of the cab. If the photographers don’t see anyone in the back, they will assume his cab is empty. He also leaves his ‘for hire’ sign on, just to help me out a bit more.
The cabbie's name is Don and he tells me that he knows my dad. He has a drink with him in the Boleyn Pub on Green Street before a West Ham game sometimes. Apparently, they went to school together.
He talks me through every street and tells me there are four photographers on the street outside the apartment block. I hear him tap in the code and we drive into the underground parking garage.
“Right, love, I’ve got ya as close to the doors as I can. I’ve parked so the passenger door opens up straight on the path. I’ll come round and let ya out. I can’t see any of them arsehole reporters, but ya never know where they might be lurking.”
I pull Don’s jacket from over my head.
“Thanks so much, Don. How much do I owe you?”
“Don’t you worry about that, sweetheart. You just get in there safe and tell your ol’ man he owes Don Weeks a drink when he next sees him.”
He comes around and opens the passenger door. I climb out, swipe my security card into the box and tap in the code.
“Thanks so much, Don,” I tell him as he waits to make sure I get in safely. I will pay him and I will make sure he gets a bloody big tip too.
“You’re more than welcome, sweetheart. Be lucky and I hope you get all this sorted and them scum leave you alone. It’s a crying bloody shame what they’re allowed to get away with. Leave ‘em down a dark alley with your dad and Uncle Finn and they wouldn’t be so brave. I can tell ya.” For some reason, this makes me give him a quick peck on the cheek as I step inside the small lobby of Cam’s apartment block. Because he owns the penthouse, he has his own lift so I swipe my card again and the doors open instantly.